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What's Your Number? SM
October-December 2004

Numerology Books

by Rob Ragozzine
of SimplyNumbers.com

Letting Go with the Help of Numerology

“We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the life that is waiting for us." --Joseph Campbell

This month we will talk about Numerology and Letting go. 

Letting go can involve a course of action similar to “spring cleaning”. It isn’t about giving up rather it is about freeing up space within your life for new possibilities. For many people, the process of letting go can begin when they understand that holding on requires too much effort or energy. You may realize that a relationship is sour or that some other situation no long supports you. Numerology can help by providing you a detailed outline of your personality, from which you can ask the tough questions. 

Some of these questions include: 

How do I see myself? (represented by your Soul Number) 
How do others see me? (represented by your Outer Number) 
What are my strengths, and how can I best use them? 
What are my perceived weaknesses, and how do I let them limit me? 
What do I want to achieve? (represented by Life Path) 
Am I willing to take risks? 
Am I ready? 

Take some quiet time to jot down your answers to these questions. You may want to talk with a close friend or a well qualified therapist to help you to learn more about yourself and begin the process of letting go. 

On the next level, you can consider your answers as part of your personal myth, your life story. Carl Jung, Joseph Campbell and others talked extensively about how exploring your personal myths would eventually help you to break free. Utilizing your words, stories and imagery in the act of letting go, helps to bring about growth, consciousness and awareness. In other words, being aware of your own personal, and mythic, stories can provide a launching pad for some of the most important self discoveries of your life. 

How do you see yourself?

How you see yourself relates to your Soul Number within Numerology. It illustrates your inner strengths, dreams and desires. It is those parts of yourself that you keep to yourself, and may not be comfortable sharing with people that you are not close to. 

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. -- Eleanor Roosevelt 

What about your dreams? Do you act on your inner desires? Do you find ways to ignite the flames of your passion? Many people keep their dreams or desires hidden. They let their dreams take a backseat to the dreams of their partner or family members. By doing this they devalue themselves and erode their self confidence. Consider what Dancer, Martha Graham said “There is a vitality, a life-force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost. “ 

The process of letting go can be aided by developing a belief in yourself and your abilities. Believing and knowing that you, and your dreams, are valuable is important. You can’t let go if you constantly tell yourself that there is no hope, that there is no point to changing. 

You need to have confidence in yourself. Confidence increases when you have self worth. When you believe in yourself, and have strong personal values, then you will be better able to let go of relationships, and situations, which do not support you. You will be able to take certain risks. A core set of personal values can help you to have more pride in yourself. 

Consider five words that describe you best. What are they? Do they include words like confident, unpretentious, proud, friendly or compassionate? 

Perhaps, you consider yourself as independent and you have a Soul Number #1. In this case, you may want to be a leader. If you don’t take steps develop your leadership skills then you diminish your self worth. At first, others may not be able to see your leadership skills, even though you know that you have them. You’ll have to step up, and let go of any fears that hold you back from developing your skills fully. 

To better connect with your personal numbers, you may wish to develop a personal story around the Tarot card that corresponds to them. Each number has its own individual meaning. The colors, images, and textures of the cards are also very important. 

1 - The Magician 
2 - The High Priestess 
3 - The Empress 
4 - The Emperor 
5 - The Hierophant 
6 - The Lovers 
7 - The Chariot 
8 – Strength 
9 - The Hermit 

You can utilize the cards in any way that is comfortable for you. You don’t have to write. You only need to discover their meaning for you. You could paint, draw, or work with clay. Author, and journaling expert, Barbara Ganam says “The art of drawing or painting enables one to energetically move an emotion outside the body where it can no longer activate the internal stress response.” In other words telling your story can aid you in your process of letting go, and allow you to heal. 

Journaling, reading stories and myths, voice dialogue, and mirror exercises have helped me to develop a clear picture of how I see myself. The creative arts, such as writing, painting, dancing, and singing may allow you to get a better focus on your issues and help to you to move past them. You may wish to begin a simple diary as part of your process. 

How do others see you?

Do others see someone who exudes confidence or self-pity? 

How others see you relates to your Outer Number within Numerology. People see you through the lens of this number. It represents your skills, characteristics and personality traits. It is those characteristics, or parts of yourself, that you feel comfortable sharing with the outside world. 

Most importantly, your Outer number indicates how your friends and family will understand and view you. It is an image that you project, and a role that you play. We all project some image to the outside world. Often, we are not conscious of the image that we project or the roles that we fit into. 

In a way, this number can be a mask. Sometimes we try to fool others into thinking that we are somebody else. How do you greet new people at parties? Do you immediately share all of your inner secrets? Probably not, as we all want to put our best foot forward when we first meet other people, including potential partners. 

We project different images, and play different roles, at specific times and events. Our co-workers will see a different image than our friends. Our friends will see a different image of us than our family members. Others often see what we want them to. However, people generally get to know us better as our relationships deepen. We become more willing to risk getting hurt. 

Numerology gives us a general understanding of the image we are projecting to the outside world. Of course, even those people closest to us can have difficulty describing how they see us. 

Do others see you as a stimulating person? If you have an Outer Number of 3 or 5, then you may like to be the life of the party as you can be witty, optimistic and engaging. However, any of us can fall into the trap where we only show the outside world our “cheerful” side, and hide the side that is in fear or pain. We show a mask to the world. How important to you is that others see the whole you, and not just the social aspects of your personality? 

Does anyone see the parts of your personality that are wounded? Do others see particular traits in you that you cannot see? Do others see you fitting into a particular role? Are you perceived as a worker? Are you seen as a loafer? We all play certain roles within the relationships in our lives. Sometimes we will need to let go of outmoded roles that we no longer fit into. As we mature, our roles within our relationships change. At 8 you may be seen as the “baby” of the family, but at 28 or 38 you will have outgrown that role. 

How do my strengths and weaknesses help or hinder me? 

Identify yourself with your strengths and virtues. This can allow others to see you in a better light. You may not be used to seeing yourself in a particular way, but with time and practice you can develop a greater belief in yourself. 

Some people associate themselves with their mistakes, weaknesses, and limitations which can limit them. Other people identify themselves with their skills and positive qualities, which can strengthen them. 

Sometimes our personalities can be both a blessing and a curse. For instance, if you have an Outer Number of 6 or 9, then others may see your compassion, concern, caring and humanity. They might not see your fun and dynamic side. Also, this type of personality, can give you a reputation that immediately draws people in or keeps them at bay. At times, you can hurt others feelings when you spend too much time, caring for someone who is in need. Others may wonder why you are not spending time with them. If you don’t learn effective communication skills then they may not understand your actions. 

You will have to understand the drawbacks to your strengths and weaknesses, and work hard to prevent unconscious actions to create crisis or damage. Start to work improving the behaviors and abilities you consider drawbacks to your effectiveness. 

What do I want to achieve?

Your Life Path is your course in life. This number helps to illuminate the opportunities, chances, challenges, and pitfalls you can encounter in life. It can help with the process of letting go, by helping you to focus on all of your important goals, especially those related to the long term. Do your present circumstances help or hinder you on your path? If you feel weighed down by some situation then perhaps it is time to find a way to let go. 

Are you the creator of your own life story? What role do you play within that story? Are you the hero? Myth can help you look at how you play the role of hero within your own life. Today you can see heros, and their journeys, in movies such as The Matrix, X-Men, Batman and of course Star Wars. The hero's journey is a part of all our own lives. What is your journey? 

Once again, looking to the Tarot card that corresponds to your Life Path will help you to learn more about the roles, including hero that you play. Joseph Campbell said that a hero was someone who has given his or her life to something bigger than oneself. In other words, are hero is a person who had stepped up, and gone for the gold. A hero is someone who shines. Where have you shined in your life? Use these points of greatness to inspire yourself. Your personal accomplishments, stories and favorite myths can help to shed light on your life, and bring relief from stress and internal conflicts. Eventually, this can help you let go and to discover greater meaning in life. Myth can show you that you’re are not alone with your fears and ambitions. 

Those people who tend to mull over the facts (those with a 5, 7 or 9 Life Path number) may have a harder time letting go of issues that involve their Life Path. They may find that mundane situations are more easily handled. For them, they start to feel tension when they look at the big picture. It may then be easier to start to look at things from a weekly or monthly perspective, rather than a longer term. 

Some of us may have important hurdles to face. In order to aid the process of letting go, and moving toward achieving our goals, we may need to face issues with the help of others. We need to remember what it is like to do great things. We need to be willing to speak up. We need to risk. We may need to be heroic. We do need to let others see our true selves. How do you express yourself, and your feelings, to others? 

Author, Researcher and Psychologist James Pennebaker has done studies on the healing power of expression, and says that stress is helped when you share details about traumatic events. He says “Brain wave active results showed that the ‘letting go’ activity of confronting trauma brought about left/right hemisphere congruence.” 

How can I use my personal numbers to help me in letting go? 

As you develop a better understanding of yourself and your abilities, you will be better able to make healthy choices. You will know when it is time to let go. You will know whether a certain role has been outgrown. Of course, the people in your life may see in you in a particular way. Often, those closest to us become accustomed to accepting us in certain roles. As you improve your understanding of yourself, and how people perceive you, you may ask yourself the following questions: 

“Is this a healthy role?” 
“Am I afraid of the story that I find myself in?” 
“Is this a demeaning role?” 
"Is this particular perception impacting me negatively in my present life?" 
“Have I outgrown that role?” 
“What stories or myths does this role relate to?” 
“How can I grow as an individual and accept a new and significant role?” 
“Am I the hero of my own life?” 
“How can I improve my relationship?” 

Asking the questions above, will help you grow as an individual. The answers will help you in your process of letting go, and they will help you to develop and mature the relationships in your life. All healthy relationships will mature. You can help your relationships to reach new levels by being aware of the roles you play and learning to take risks and letting go of the situations and roles that no longer support you. 

The progression of learning more about yourself through myth, art, stories and Numerology can help you in the process of letting go. Currently, you may not be aware of your particular story, but you can recognize the various plots, people, places, events and scenes that make up your personal story. Hopefully you can weave this information into a successful and beautiful personal story. 

Good luck in your journey in Soulful living and Numerology. 

Tools & Resources:

Soul Number: www.simplynumbers.com/html/interactive/sn_int_soul.asp

Outer Number: www.simplynumbers.com/html/interactive/sn_int_outer.asp 

Life Path: http://www.simplynumbers.com/html/interactive/sn_int_lp.asp

Interesting Reading: 

Arthritis & Journaling: http://arthritis.about.com/od/journaling 
Smyth JM, Stone AA, Hurewitz A, Kaell A. Effects of writing about stressful experiences on symptom reduction in patients with asthma or rheumatoid arthritis: a randomized trial. JAMA 1999 Apr 14;281(14):1304-9. 

James Pennebaker: http://pennebaker.socialpsychology.org Pennebaker, J.W. (2004). Writing to heal: A guided journal for recovering from trauma and emotional upheaval 

Read myths 
Keep a diary 
Take up painting, singing, or working with clay 
Join a support group 
Relationship counseling 

Diary Writers: 

Anais Nin 
Hugh Prather 
Anne Frank 
Samuel Pepys 

Copyright © 2004 Rob Ragozzine. All Rights Reserved. 

Click here to learn more about Rob Ragozzine

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Click here to Read Rob's Aug-Sept Column


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