Life-Changing Discoveries About
Conscious Living and Conscious Loving
Kathlyn Hendricks, Ph.D.
& Gay Hendricks, Ph.D.
In our work with several
thousand couples, as well as our own relationship of
over twenty years, we've had the pleasure and privilege
of discovering what it takes to create lives of
exhilarating self-renewal. These discoveries have
changed our lives profoundly, and we offer them to you
in hopes that you can put their practical magic to work
in your life.
The First Discovery
Although women and men may seem on the surface to be
from different planets, we are all absolutely the same
at deeper levels. At the soul-level, we are seamlessly
connected to each other. Heart-resonance and
soul-connection transcend physical distance.
The Second Discovery
Relationship itself is the ultimate spiritual path.
Relationship interactions show us what we most need to
learn for our spiritual growth to become real. Without a
commitment to learning from each relationship moment,
years of meditation or therapy make no real difference
The Third Discovery
All of us have two deep relationship needs:
Closeness with others and space for individual growth.
Most of us feel fears of getting close and fears of
genuine independence. If you know how to use your
organic body-wisdom--breathing, conscious movement,
awareness--you can dissolve your fears of closeness and
independence with remarkable ease. Fear is merely
excitement minus the breath—we’re all only a breath
away from turning the fear of losing ourselves into the
excitement of union with others and the universe.
The Fourth Discovery
Commitment opens the field of possibility in which
miraculous relationship transformations can occur. There
is no substitute for total commitment. 99% commitment is
the same as 1% or 0%. The moment we make a full
commitment, the magic of possibility replaces
indecision, confusion and resistance.
The Fifth Discovery
Most of us have been taught a ruinous lie: That
truth hurts and we must lie to survive. In working with
20,000 people over the past thirty years, we discovered
something very different: Truth heals, lies hurt. Hiding
feelings or deeds destroys soul-growth in relationship.
Speaking authentically, with no blame, restores the flow
of loving connection. We have found no exceptions.
The Sixth Discovery
Blame destroys relationship, responsibility heals
it. Thinking of ourselves as victims turns a
relationship into an entanglement. Taking ownership
asking--"How did I contribute to making this
happen?" instead of "Who’s to blame for
this?"--restores a flow of connection.
The Seventh Discovery
Essence--who we truly are-- blossoms in an atmosphere
of authenticity and appreciation. When you are honest
with yourself and others, you create a field of clarity
and safety around you wherever you go. When you love
yourself deeply, you open a deeper capacity to love
others. When two or more people link up in an atmosphere
of authenticity and love, a field of boundless creative
possibility comes into being.
© 2000 Kathlyn
Hendricks, Ph.D. and Gay Hendricks, Ph.D.
More about these discoveries may
be found in books we¹ve written, including CONSCIOUS
LOVING, THE CONSCIOUS HEART and the new CONSCIOUS
LIVING. If you would like to learn more about conscious
living and conscious loving, give our institute a call
or visit our website.
The Hendricks Institute -
Dr. Kathlyn Hendricks and Dr.
Gay Hendricks have published over twenty books on
transformational subjects. They have appeared on over
500 radio and television shows, including Oprah, Leeza,
CNN, CBS's 48 Hours and many others. They live in Santa
Barbara, and maintain branches of their institute in
Europe and the U.S.