Get the Monkeys Off Your Back!
by Robin L. Silverman
 When you were little, you probably made a lot of wishes. So did I. Unfortunately, it always seemed to be a hit-or-miss proposition: sometimes they came true, but often, they didn't. So when I became an adult, I decided to see if there wasn't a way to smooth out the process and make it more reliable. By reading and experimenting with a combination of spiritual and scientific practices, I found that there are a few secrets that may be of use to you now.
Are you walking around with a monkey on your back? Most of us are. "Monkeys" are worries, regrets, anger and guilt that never keep quiet and refuse to sit still. They are born from the more than 50,000 thoughts each of us think each day, largely about things we cannot control, do not wish to see happen, won’t have time to experience or can’t let go. When it comes to mind and spirit self-improvement, monkeys are what hold us back from thinking clearly, reaching our goals and feeling more peaceful.
I know a lot about mental monkeys because I often feel like I am carrying around an entire zoo. "Go here!" one screeches. "No, go there!" another insists. They chatter on about my weight, my undone laundry and the garden I haven’t started. Depending on the day, the setting or whoever’s present in the room with me, they may remind me incessantly that I’m about to miss a deadline, a train or an important piece of the conversation because I’m still stewing about something someone said a dozen years ago.
Mental monkeys, unfortunately, sabotage all other self-improvement methods. If I set the alarm clock to work out, I hear, "I don’t want to get out of bed." If I try to meditate, they start talking about breakfast and the staff meeting at 10:00. Even trying something as simple as watching my breath is a challenge, since they’ll laugh and say, "You’re not doing it right!"
I’ve done my best to get rid of my monkeys, but it’s not so easy to do. No one else wants them. Have you ever seen the eyes of your friends or your co-workers glaze over when you try to give them some of what’s bothering you? I’ve tried ignoring my monkeys, but they just pop up in the middle of the night and, like infant children, scream until I’m awake enough to feed and comfort them. Soothing them with positive thoughts is only a temporary salve for their restlessness. Counseling silenced a few, but in time, their places were filled with new monkeys. I’ve thought about choking them more than once, but somehow that feels as if I’m suffocating a part of myself. I know lots of people who are carrying around dead monkeys on their backs, and they’re not happy about it...
>>> Continue Reading "Get the Monkeys Off Your Back!"©
Copyright Robin L. Silverman. This article was originally
published at our website, SoulfulLiving.com, in June
2002, as part of Soulful Living's "Self Improvement" Issue.
Click to View Our "Daily Soul Retreat" Newsletter Archive
|
