This month, it will be two years since my father passed away. I am frightened because, as time goes by, the memory of his physical presence grows farther and farther away. Today it is harder to see his beautiful, glowing soul, hear his melodic voice, and feel his warm embrace
than it was just one year ago. And, I know, as time goes on, these physical memories will become even more faint. I suppose if the memories were as vivid today as they were two years ago that the pain would be even greater. If there is a positive, I guess it is the knowledge that time and distance
help to heal the pain. But, what I wouldn't give to be able to give my father one last hug, have one last glance, and hear one last note of his sweet voice. I am comforted knowing that my father's light will forever live in my heart. No time or distance can ever take that away from me.
In this chaotic world filled with disappointments; one right after another, we begin to feel hopeless...voiceless. "My voice doesn't matter enough to change anything. One voice carries little weight for change in this world." We all think this at one time or another. If every voice would speak at
once...what thunder we would hear! Strike up a storm that rumbles with intent. -Jane
My Thought for the Day: "Old age gives you the wisdom of experience, and being young gives you the insight of innocence." - Pauline Gates
The spiritual life is a reaching out to our innermost self, to our fellow human and to our God.
Henri J.M. Nouwen
It is a rainy day today and one that brings a sense of peace to the world. As I sit here listening to a Piano CD of such pieces of music as Endless Love, Minuet in G, Fur Elise, The Rose, and even Smoke Gets in Your Eyes...I am calmed by the combination of writing, reflecting, bathing in music,
and even meditating through these mediums.
I feel depressed because I have not taken advantage of the opportunities I was given in life. Maybe I'll feel better tomorrow.
MY DIARY: I do love this Site and I know I will be reading alot of the info you have shown me but I would like to add something I love writing in my own journal nothing will ever take the place of my Diary ~*~*~* Ann ~*~*~*
Most journaling books say to hand write materials...my hand writing is slow and very poor looking so I"'m goin to try and just use a word processor. I do have a bit of a problem with the attitude that journaling is important...what did illiterate cultures do...were they just misearble repressed
humans? As with most other things, journaling will not be the panacea for all people
Poem titled-Awarness >I know that you can't love anyone else until you love every inch of yourself >I know that people tend to do things you disagree with,but it's you who gets angry >I know that self-love is developed with time, patience and understanding >I know that it takes more energy to
hate someone than it does to love them >I know that material things look pretty, but it doesn't create who you are >I know that beauty lies within,& the outer appearence is only a vechile to carry you through >I know that you only feel the need to be better than someone, if you really feel like less
>I know that your friends become your family over time >I know that times can get hard >I know that you'll always make it through those hard times >I know that you can't master anyone's mind until you master your own >I know that people can be cruel >I also know ypu can re-create what goes on around
you >I know that love can hurt, but time heals the wounds >I know that your thoughts create your experience >I know that because people yell or get angry, it doesn't mean they don't love each other >I know that you must speak the words the way you'd like to hear them >I know that times can bring
lonliness, yet you can go within to seek comfort >I know there's One creator of life, and once you realize this, it's easier to stop judging and labeling
May you find Peace and Unity Within Kristine Reedy Kristinereedy@savage-international.com
My thoughts for today is the following I am a writer but I need to find the time to do the things I love the most.And that is writing From :Diariest
Thank-you for this website. What a lovely idea. I look forward to hearing from others who are seeking ways to live more soufully. I was in a "Teamworks" Group that met once a month for two years. We met to talk about goals and priorities and to encourage, support and challenge each other. That
group broke up and I miss it. I wonder if there is a way to do that sort of thing online.
Thought For The Day, "Few have far to go, the rest of us are just hanging out."
It has been a good day. I have connected, have met with people and discussed issues of importance. I am learning and growing. I am listening to my own inner wisdom. I am learning to slow down and get quiet when it is necessary. The most important gift that I can give today is appreciation and
I have been on a long journey always striving to move forward. I know the whispers of heaven are calling to me, yet I do not listen. My heart aches for understanding and support and yet I feel so alone. My mind always thinking, & planning spins out of control for concepts not yet internalized,
for they are only small inspirations of what I do not know. Can you hear my cries, my desperation for understanding, my hope for acceptance.
So I will keep truding along the only way I know how, with faith as my sheild that someday it will I will reach the ultimate goal and with hope that I will someday reach the top of the mountain and there I will rest and be grateful for all that I have and endured.
God Bless You and Yours Diane email@example.com
This is my first time at this site. It is beautiful, not just the design, though that is wonderful also, but what everyone has to say. I am 19 years old and I have just started my soul search. Though it has always been there, I have never been so aware of it as now. Before I had always lived in a
world of "me" and "I". I have learned or should I say remembered that we are all connected in this life and it is a wonderful thing. If you really feel with your soul you can feel the power. It is beyond words. We are a part of something so precious it could almost make you cry. And the not knowing
of exactly what it is all about is wonderful and exciting. I use to think that this world was harsh and cruel and nothing matter. I even tried suicide a few times, but one day I had a wake-up call and realixed everything. How precious we ALL are. We must treat everyone like we would want to be
treated because they are us. I am you, you are me and that is grand.
Sometimes life can be a pain at this time I have found refugei n two things My Saviour Jesus Christ and my diary *Diariest*
I remember my father in who he was and not how he was. I remember the smell of him and the way he was a grump in the mornings. The feel of his unshaved cheek against my soft one. The smell of resin reminds me of him and his surfboards. The sound of the turning surf brings him back to me. The
feeling of sand stuck on my toes. The sight of my brother and the way he laughs. My dad has been dead twelve years and I still miss him. SBOT
Trudging through the middle class ennui and tedium that composes the majority of these posts I do have to wonder how Online Diary sites manage to create such a wonderfully homogeneous entity or writers and readers. The blanket grey wash of vaguely New Age philosophy and belief in the omnipotence
of "creative activities" creates an exquisite tedium that begs the question, "So What?"
Don't know much about feng shui, but my sewing corner did not feel right. After 6 years, I turned it around last week and WOW. I've been sewing like crazy. It just feels right now. It's wonderful. What else can I turn around in my life as I near 53 and retirement. Joan Lowder
I, John, always wanted to know what the unresolved discontent was in me. I was filled with anxeity, from as long as I can remember, I was scared of everything. My spirituality and faith were words that covered only the surface of my life. Things happened, an accident at work, an anxeity disorder,
a depression. I call it the black hole. Shaking all night and breathing so hard during the day that my chest hurt. Spending 3 weeks at a partial hospital program led to a decision to go to work again part time.I can not write anymore about my trek back to reality, it would be to long. What I will
say is that now I am closer to Jesus Christ than everbefore, I know he is alive. I believe in all my heart that that incident in my life needed to happen. I couldn't see it than, but now I do. I have changed and continue to get better.
E-mail me if you want to talk about similar incidents- firstname.lastname@example.org
I feel like I am nothing. Why doesn't he know that I would give hime everthing I have just to be with him? My body, my heart, my soul. But he will never know my feelings. I cannot tell him. I will not tell him.
Brandon Hamiltion if you are reading this I hope you are happy for ruining my life.
*Kate* (I would have given him the world.)
But I want somthing else to get me through this semi-charmed kind of life. Seriously.
Brandon Hamilton. My one true love and he turned me aside like a piece of trash. Even my dog left me---for Ina! Oh why is life so semi-charmed?
Dear Kate I feel your pain. in time I'm sure you will see that you are much better off without this person in your life.Someone else wonderful is waiting out there for you -- this person will cherish you and your love. *Diarist*
Kate, my heart goes out to you. i've been there too. - your friend
I enjoyed the most lovely day in my garden today. A day spent truly in the present momnet... hearing the needs of each plant spoken to me and tending to those needs. gardening is wonderful for the soul.
My life is so incredibly lucky and blessed. What did I do in my life to deserve this. I feel sometimes like I am waiting for the other shoe to drop and all will be gone/ruined.
I have calmed something previously unresolved in me. I have hushed the clamor of my clamoring for company, of me betraying myself, again and again with fear of being alone with my thoughts. Tonight, I was compelled to pull up a seat and join myself for dinner. We had a lovely, unhurried, and
From Diariest To Other Writers
I live in Ohio and it seems so hard to find other writers I need inspiration It seems so hard to sit down and relax and do some writing that is something I love to you .I have left messages on the message board but I can never find other writers Where are you diariest/writers if you are out there
email me : email@example.com or check out my web site :http://writerscloset.homestead.com ~*~*~*~*~*~*I need inspiration~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~
My thought focuses on many people. I recently felt this quote I found can relate to so many people but mostly, I am referring to teenagers, who are still growing up.
"The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good."
This quote means so much to me because today, in this world, so many people are judgemental and are inconsiderate of others feelings.
Take this quote into mind. Use it. It will help down the road.
I'm on a spiritual quest. I started this quest when I turned 50. I'm still a novice, a beginner. Each day I discover more about myself, some things that I like and some things that I would like to change. I just discovered this location today. You can be sure I'll be back. Life can be such a
it all begins with a tiny step. a breath. to breathe in commitment and exhale contentment. but the breath needs filtering...sort of an alien experience...like being from another planet. We must filter the breath to find the commitment. Breathe it in, fully, slowly, purposefully and hold it there
so it nourishes the heart, heals the wounds. Exhale contentment. Again and again. Stop breathing and the result is obvious. I ask myself, am I ready to breathe the purity of commitment? Pollution is a habit. Time for me to work on change. Breathe.
Today I want to share my thoughts with you and they are very personal but I figure that it is a way to help others as well. I lost my sister a few weeks ago and she was a young woman, talented and full of spirituality and even though Im still in shock at the whole thing I have come to realize one
important thing and that is to enjoy life and the gifts that offers us each day. Some people have the chance to travel to different places and they take that for granted when there is nothing more magnificent than seeing the wonders of the world but with the eyes of the spirit. My advice to everyone
is to enjoy the wonders of life, enjoy the sunset, enjoy the beach, enjoy a simple dinner with your family, enjoy a romantic evening with your partner, just enjoy with gusto and wondering eyes. Remember that life is a gift and we should love every minute with have with sincere love.
Im a simple woman who happens to think life is a wonderful gift most human take for granted and it shouldnt be that way. Today watching the tv show Everyday Elegance with Colin Cowie I come te realize that some people have incredible blessings that they should be thankful about and it came to me
how we dont put a bit of beautifullness to our lifes.
I admire Colin because he is a simple and elegant man who knows how to enjoy his work and his life style but we dont need to have much money to do so, we can enjoy life even if we are middle class people. We can make dinners more beautiful just we a touch of flowers and color napkins to our tables,
also we can enjoy lunch at the patio from time to time or may be eat at the kitchen making it creative and pretty looking. We just get to wrapped up with work and
stress when we should be enjoying the beauty of life.
I walked along the beach early this morning -- something I've just begun to do again - after a long time away. I've missed this time of reflection. I wonder why I've allowed myself to ignore this part of my environment. . . I live less than 200 yards from the place that brings me supreme peace
and gratitude. . . I've allowed life to get in the way. . . I look at the shells as I walk, daring not to touch them all, for touching them creates a connection and to throw one back because it is not "perfect" is like throwing a person away who is not "perfect." Why do we do that to people? Judge
them? Label them? Ignore them? That is not our role on this earth. . . You see, the shells are us. Broken, weathered, withered, glistening, and forever rolling with the tides - riding out the storms, sparkling in the newness of a day, waiting to connect with someone who comes along and touches us. .
. . ~ a Florida beach walker
I don't know if Im living in the wrong century but I still believe in knights in shinning armor. To me a knight and shinnig armor is a man who is first of all sincere, tender, valient, inteligent, loyal and sentimental, maybe someone like this is hard to find but I know he is alive some place on
I was about to leave my quest of ever finding me, after my sister's passing to heaven I began to experience fear, an incredible fear of failure. I still have that fear but something inside of me tells me to go on with my quest. Ever since I can remember I have been waiting for this modern knight and
even though I had more hopes before, Im not ready to let go of this dream.
Shoul I stop dreaming of finding this true love or should I go on, this is my question to God. If someone could inspire me with an answer my life will be a bit easier.
Where is my knight and shinning armor?
Being one with God means walking the road less traveled in life. Try it sometime it is absolutely wonderful to experience. -Melissa
I have nothing profound to say. Though I want to have something lasting profound to leave behind me. I have lived over half my life and the next or the rest of my life I wonder what is expected of me or can I live for me for once. I want my girls to know that I love them and that they are my
life. Children do that for some reason, make you live for them. I wonder if my mother lived for me. I miss my mother even today. Thirty years has passed since her death, and the pain and the void is still there. Will there be that void there for my girls. I don't want a void to be there. I want a
pleasure there in knowing that I was a good mother. Im not a typical mother, Im like a sister, a friend to my girls. They tell me so many personal things that no mother ought to hear. That is the way I want it, I want them to be comfortable. I don't judge them. I protect them. Im entering another
phase of my life. Thursday will tell if I will be here to make a difference in the world. Its going to be a day Iv waited for for months. Maybe I won't be alone anymore, I want to love again before I die. I want to laugh, love, and share life with somebody special. This rose wants to bloom
May God Bless You, "Rose"
I am waiting for my Knight in Shining Armor -- I know that he is out there and that the Universe will present him to me when it is time. I will wait till then...
Life was made for living.
If you want to succeed you have to believe you can.
It is early morning, and I've just nursed my three- and-a-half month-old baby girl and put her back to bed. What a gift from God she is! As I struggle with other challenges in my life -- being a working mom and new parent, trying to still find time to be a loving wife, and searching for a way to
permanently loose a considerable amount of weight -- I need to remember how very lucky I am to have this tiny, precious being in my life. Sometimes when I gaze at her I still can't believe she is "my daughter." There's nothing like the birth of child to add clarity to your life; I'm no longer
confused about what the priorities should be in my life. I need only look at Kaylee, and there is my answer. -- Karen
I'm so excited that I found this site. This is going to be a neat place for me to open up and write down all my thoughts.
Today was boring an i dident get to see my boyfriend
I started a new job yesterday, I was transfered to another department of the building I work in, another transition to go to. First I lose my sister and now one month after I have a new job, so many beginnings in such short time. I feel like a fish out of the sea in this new job, it will take
getting use to since I was for many years in the other department.
I need to find time for myself and for my healing process, I need to do some interior work in me so I will let go of my pain and also all the new feelings Im feeling of fear and somewhat panic. I need to meditate and do breathing exercises, I have heard of Tai Chi, some people
say is extraordinary for the mind, soul and body, so I will go in search of some video o book that will help me with some simple exercises to start a new routine. I know that right now I need to focus in me and my healing.
What does it mean to let yourself down? What do u do to be a disappointment to yourself? I feel that I have the key to unlock the doors to these questions. But I keep the answers close to me so I don't disappoint or let down those close to me. I'm afraid to let them see the truth. I know that if
I was happy with the person who I am there would be no reason to hurt others or myself. It's not easy to be friends with the person you have to look at in the mirror day after day. I want to find joy in who I am. I will find joy in who I am. But it will take time, patientce, and courage to face the
reality. I will emerge from the cacoon that now incases the old me to emerge and become the beautiful butterfly that is aching to get out and experience the the old world with new wings.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* From:Diariest I wish that I could find a place where I could go where other diariest meet such as I .I long for someone like me that like to write in a diary or journal it helps a great deal to write your thoughts on the pages I have written in
62 diaries and I long for more I love to write and I still wish that I could find someone I really need someone that we can share our ideas if anyone want to share over internet Then email me:firstname.lastname@example.org.I will email you back and we can share ideas over the internet female or male. From
Diariest To ALL FELLOW DIARIEST ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
i haven't written for awhile and i really miss it. i've felt like something has missing in my life and i hope i can figure out what it is because i feel so down. i feel like i'm all alone although tere are so many people surrounding me.i also feel distant from god the one thing i reelly need in
my life right now. ijust prey that god can feel this emptiness i'm feeling. and i can start shinig through.
I think I've found a friend. This is my first time at this site. I hold onto the thought that "we are where we are supposed to be". I have felt an uneasiness for so long. I yearn for feeling "at peace". What am I missing? I feel so lonely even though I am so busy with life.
I want to be happy with someone. I long to love someone. I have so much love to give. God, are you preparing that perfect person for me? I will be patient then.
My soul longs for - rainy days - walks in the woods - canoe trips - mornings in the mountains - walks on the beach -travels to see God's wonders - laughter - friends/family - a good book - moonlight - sunrise and sunsets - a garden to toil in - a life to love! Love and God
hello, my name is lori jean. i hope noone ever takes a breath for granted. we are all here today to experience what it is to be human, and to error is human. so if your having one of those days where nothing seems to go your way or if your constantly dwelling on your mistakes in life, i want you
to stop right now! and remember everyone has the capability to be hitler or mother mary teresa. all these superficial images we all have of some people, for instance, either someone is just plain good or just plain rotten, are very wrong. just as in yin and yang, there's a little evil in the good
and a little good in evil. it's what makes the world go round. one of my biggest mistakes in life changed me for the better, what i mean is that my son was an unplanned pregnancy or an "accident" as it is most commonly refered to. but everytime i look into his big blue eyes i'm reminded of what
unconditional love is all about. sometimes i am so overcome by his love i cry. without my "mistake" i would not be living the good life of a loving mother and a loving housewife, instead i would probibly be somewhere totaly different doing the opposite of what i do here everyday which is try to
spread as much love as i can muster, and i am so thankful for that.
believe it or not so many people have been shamed growing up, even in little ways, some are ashamed or embarrassed to be themselves. some children think that thier parents only love them when they are not acting like themselves, mabey the parent wants the children to act a
certain way or yell when the children are harmlessly having a little fun, or some parents try to live out thier own dreams through thier children and that is also very wrong. we are all put here on earth to be our own unique selves, how are children to know this if they grow up thinking noone will
love me if i act like myself, so usually they take over thier parents personalities since they know them the best and do the same to thier children. it's the great circle of shaming, and it needs to stop! the only problem: how do you teach everyone living on this planet that we are all different
from everybody else and there is nothing wrong with that.
Today is hard for me. I am going through some painful decisions of letting go of my youngest child and helping her to go on her way. It has come to a point that she needs her own place and I hate to let her go. She is now 21 years old and it has been really hard living in the same house. She is
an adult and she needs to be on her own. I never thought that it would be so hard. I know that we raise them to let them go and I do want to, but I worry that something bad could happen to her and I just want to protect her. She and I have been fighting a lot lately and I know it is because she
wants to "do her thing," and I am probably in the way. How do you let go and still feel that everything will be okay?
I love being able to come to this web to write all my thoughts down. I'm feeling so good today and I feel so welcome in this awsome world I hope everybody can see the joy in life as I do right now.
July 11, 20000 This is truly one of the most beautiful sites on the web.It has much valuable information for the search for my inner self. Thank you. I will be returning again and again. Sending all of you light on your journey, Susan Toronto,Canada
Feeling stuck in life with much anxiety and fear for the future, today was very rewarding. I took a day off from my redundant desk job (stuck in a cubicle) to just get things done that might help me not feel so stuck. This site was wonderful to visit and add to my file of bookmarks!
Hi I woke up today feeling good and I went for a run. But I am so tired now I just want to crash. I have so much to do and not a lot of time.
Hi i'm feeling a lot better i actually feel like i have friends again. i went out with some old friends last night and it felt so good not to be alone. i've really been trying hard to tolerate my sister but it seems like the harder i try the more frusterated i get. i feel good and energetic
althogh i'm kind of disapointed i didnt go run this morning. i hope everyone is having a wonderful day.
Sometime life throws us a curve ball that we nevr could have expected. Just when we think we're headed in one direction... life takes another turn. but maybe this turn is necessary on the path to geting to where we need to go.
Hi I haven't writen for a while but I went out last night and it was really fun to do some things with my friends. i'm playing in a softball tournament this weekend and it's been a lot of fun. I'm playing with some guys who I didnt talk to much before but they've really turned out to be cool. Me
and my sister are not understanding each other real well I just don't understand her. I'm so exited just to relax tonight. My grandmas coming over and she always brings joy to our house. I hope everybody has a nice night.
Hi i'm feeling very tired today and my body is pretty worn out. i just got done playing in a softball tournament. i felt like i did pretty good but i don't understand why some people get so competative. its starting to rain outside and there is no where else i'd rather be than inside watching a
good movie. i love the rain but i feel a little lonely i have my family and everything but sometimes i just want that soulmate to be with me. will i ever find that persoin i can spend the rest of my life with? how long do i have to wait although there are times i love just being by myself and not
even thinking about anyone.
sOMETIMES I FEEL SO HOPELESS. I HAVE SO MUCH IN THIS WORLD BUT IT SEEMS MY BODY JUST WON'T DO WHAT IT NEEDS TO. I FEEL LIKE ALL I'VE BEEN DOING IS EATING BUT I ALWAYS WANT MORE. MY WEIGHT IS ALWAYS ON MY MIND AND I GET SO SCARED OF GAINING WEIGHT EVEN THOUGH DEEP DOWN I KNOW MY BODY WILL BE FINE
IF I GAIN A COUPLE POUNDS. I KNOW I'M BUAETIFUL NO MATTER MY SIZE.
i love myself. i love that i am athletic. i love that i am good at most everything i try. i love that i'm not afraid to try new things. i love that i have a lot of friend. i love that i'm outgoing. i love that i'm independant. i love that i can be alone and still be happy. i love that i am never
bored and can always find something to do. i love that i am able to work on things so i can always improve myself. i love that i love to run. i love that i'm srong. i love that i'm healthy. i love that i have such an awsome family. i love that i like to meet new people. i love that i'm not shy. i
love that i'm able to do everything that i love to do. i love that i'm able to walk. i love that i'm able to talk and listen. i love that i'm smart. i love that i have a voice and i can use it. i love that i'm a women. i love having three sisters and being close to them. i love that i can help
people out. i love that i can see. i love watching the seasons change. i love that i have food to eat. i love that i have a computer that i can share my thoughts on. i love that i can read. i love that i can hear. i love the sound of rain. i love to watch the rain. i even love to walk in the rain. i
love that i love myself. i love god. i love that i have angels watching over me. i love that i am proud of who i am. i love my hair. i love my body. i love my eyes. i love this world i live in. i love that i am able to grow each day in all areas of my life. i love the lessons i learn each day. but
above all i love myself.
Thanks to our spiritual dimension, which can be defined as the aspect of ourselves that does not believe in limitations because it does not experience them, we can challenge the most basic boundaries that enclose us. -Deepak Chopra ¤Matilda¤
this is the first time I am writing here. I am so glad this site exists. my journey of insight began before i was even aware of it. lately though i have had to notice. going through a seperation and trying to learn to love myself for the first time, it is hard work. the more i love myself the
more i realize how so many of the men i chose did not. the hardest thing i am having to face is the reality that some people are so damaged that no amount of love and understanding can heal them. they are so closed off to the love that does exist in this world, it is really sad. Especially, when you
care about them. i read somewhere that sometimes you just have to cross the bridge and move on, when others are ready they will do the same. tabli
I am so glad to be alive. This world is such a beautiful place.
I haven't called my husband for a month. How can i ignore his selfcentered behavior towards me. How can people be so cruel as to not be available to their loved ones when thy are sick. I get so lonely though, no one to do things with. My friends are either married or dating seriously and have
limited time for me. I am so scared of ending up alone all my life, yet I am not willing to be hurt and ignored by someone who claims to love me. I need some single friends. Tabli
Hi i hope everybodies having a good day. i'm really trying to teach myself how to type and i'm hoping if i type to this site everyday i'll be able to learn soon.
Diariest here .Just thanking God that I am here my writing is getting better I am learning and understanding myself at one point in my life I was just writing but now I am writing because I need to chance and I love to write my thoughts in the pages of my diaries.There is nothing like it.
My one question today is will i ever find that one guy thats right for me? i feel like i'm all alone in a world so big. How am i ever gonna find that one guy that's right for me. Please god just help me to find the right guy for me at the right time.
Today I was thinking about my life and trying to get things in order....like that would ever happen...but I was thinking about what the thing was that caused the most grief in my life so I could better deal with it...and I came to some conclusions:
1. It is very easy to be hurt when you care about someone more than they care about you.
2. Its always good to have something to do when you are angry. Channeling excess anger and energy into something good is a good idea.
3. You can't always depend on people just because they say you always can.
4. Time can be both an evil and a blessing, and sometimes both at once.
5. Sometimes is harder to NOT do anything than to do something.
6. Being lonely is worse than being poor.
Thats all for now....I'm feeling pretty low on the totem pole today.
Peace and Strength, ~Annie
What do you do when the only people who are able to dry your tears are the ones that are making you cry? ~Annie
hi everybody hope everybody is full of joy.
I wake up with a fresh, new, positive start in the morning.. but then my brother comes along and it seems the day is ruined. I hate fights, I don't think I start it, but I can never remember, why the fights, how the fights... I want to love him, but why does he have to push me away or try to
Deep inside each of us, in places nobody likes to think about, lurk our gods and monsters. The distinction between the two can be a very fine line sometimes. Most people like to think of themselves as civilised, as rational beings incapable of the inhumanities, the atrocities, the sheer
animalities which fill evening media reports. But in truth, we are the people whom we read about. We are those savages whom we see on the television nightly. No one can sink to a depth of evil that does not exist in the best of his brethren, nor can one rise to a goodness that cannot be found in the
most despicable of his compatriots. The world is rife with the stench of Humanity's foulness, yet perfumed with her nobility. It is my most fervent wish that we survive as a species long enough, that the sweet fragrance of our Humanity, overpowers the sickly odor of it.
As someone with a chronic disease, it sometimes hard to be upbeat and optimistic. And doing it alone, my Husband died 15 yrs ago, is not easy. But I remember the words of my Grandmother, "this to will pass, and God's love is never-failing," have helped me keep me sanity. I have journaled ever
since my husband died, and I believe has helped me to keep perspective in this ever-changing world. Thank you for this "My Thoughts" site. Jeanne
Writing in a public forum seems a little awkward to me but I'm sure it will, at some point, come easily. I've been writing and keeping a journal for years but have found myself closing off and not being honest with myself concerning my emotions. Not that my life is bad, just my interpretation is
a bit skewed. Being content is one thing, happiness is another.
Trying to fall easily through this life, sometimes I feel as if I am falling too fast. At other times I feel like I am just floating. As life goes on, though I feel I am falling farther from where I should be. Perhaps, this is why we die.
It is such a wonderful thing to express yourself in words. To put on paper what is bottled up in your mind and your very being. I've only recently learned how rewarding it is to journal. This website allowed me to see that I am not alone in life's struggles. We all have circumstances to deal with
and we are not alone. Life offers some very challenging situations. It's how we handle them is where our strengh lies. It's great to XPRS YRSLF! Peace!
FOR GOD HAS NOT GIVEN US A SPIRIT OF FEAR, BUT OF POWER, OF LOVE, AND OF A SOUND MIND.
Every now and again my sweetie and I go to the dog pound and look over the pups. We are in no position to have a dog just yet, but it's fun to day dream. We could have that Boston Terrier and name her Bubba Jean, or this here Basset Hound and call him Phipps. There are always little notes the
pound staff likes to write about each dog. "Blackie likes to DIG!" Which means you can kiss those flower beds good bye. "Bashia is not good with children." Letting you know that with Basia you will be the lady with the fat, mean dog. The dog that makes all the neighborhood kids cry when she goes out
for a walk. Todays favorite was a weenie dog named Tina who is "A nice old lady, but needs her teeth brushed." We keep going because, well, someday we will be able to get a dog that we love. And also because someday I hope to see a note on a kennel that says "Freckles likes to drag his behind on the
carpet." That will be my favorite day!
I just read your great interview with Salle Redfield, and needed to share a quote from one of Sonaya Roman's books, which relates to the creation of your wonderful web site!
"When things happen effortlessly, and doors open, it is not only because you are on your own higher path, but you are weaving it into the higher vision for all mankind"!
My life works like this all the time and I love it! I just do what Oprah told us in 1987 when I met her in Fort Lauderdale: "I totally listen to my inner voice guiding me, and I believe that is God talking to me"! "And if I have doubts about something, I don't do it"!
THANK YOU FOR CREATING A FABULOUS WEB SITE!
ANGEL HUGS! SusanADvorak@aol.com
It's been a busy day just like every day. How I would love to remove so much of the "clutter" from my life. It has been wonderful to discover peace within and to experience moments of peace away from all the noise. -- Just a thought:) P
Is it ever too late to begin soul searching? Sometimes I feel that it is something that I should have started at least a half a lifetime ago. I know it is never too late and yet I can't seem to convince my inner self of that. The ups and downs, the quick mood swings; the knowing where I am and
where I'm going, but wanting it to change and yet not to change. I want to be happy with the way it all is....but I feel guilty wanting it. And that makes for unhappiness. I need to learn how to soul search. Is it a reasonable quest.....can it really be learned? My quest is to find the answer to
this and then apply what is learned.
It is never too late to search your soul for the answers you need to mold your life into what you want it to be. You have already taken the first step, which is realizing your desire to soulsearch and looking to start doing so. I congratulate you. It is a truely wonderful thing to do, and it
really does have a very positive impact on your life and the lives of those around you. It has changed the way I look at the world. It can be learned if you are open to it. Its not something that can be learned by reading a book or following instructions...it comes from within. Best of luck to you.
This is a quick, 5 minute entry. I feel I am being held back, financially...I applied for a job and they(my potential employers) have not gotten back to me...they are offering 9 dollars an hour for very monotonous factory work...but it is the money I need...not the tedium...so I have to put up
with the tedium until I get back into classes to find out what *I* want to do, not what my English teacher or my dad wanted for me. I need the money to find a place of my own to explore the new aspects of my changing beliefs and not be judged by my dad, a Methodist minister. Anyone know of any way
to intuitively pray or set up a sacred space to help the money situation along? Anything along those lines???
A soul-searcher, beginning all over again.
Calgone take me away, better yet the shores of Lake MI. What a day of work. Took a resident to the doctor's office today and my soul has been sucked dry, my heart aches, angry and tired. Someone who lives where I work is not taking care of herself and she is much younger than most everyone else.
If she continues in this self destructive path, which she says is going to happen anyway, she will lose one or both legs due to her own choices. I am mad at her. I know there is nothing I can do but talk to her and try to encourage her. Talked to our ADON before I clocked out now I'm just trying to
unwind before I go home and enjoy the weekend. Feels good to sit here in the quiet and close my eyes. Feeling better already. Thanks, your friend, P :)
Feeling somewhat confused. I feel bombarded with all these spiritual self-help books and websites that sound so wonderful! I was raised primarily as a Christian, but parts of Christianity don't work for me very well anymore. I am trying to decide what I truly believe about the Universe and the
Deity. Feeling like I have to choose exactly what I believe before trying to find a mate...or maybe I should find a mate who is just as confused as I am and join him in his own spiritual quests. There is one young man who might fit the bill, but he does not really want to try to figure out his
emotions and beliefs. It's like he wants to stay where he is, and this frustrates me, because ultimately, I am his friend, and I know all too well that I cannot personally "save him." Nor can I commit the soul-to-soul crime of forcing him to any particular religion. But he says he feels he has no
real reason for living and he wants to commit suicide. This scares me a great deal...if any of you would want to offer prayers, I would appreciate it greatly...
Anna, the soul-searcher beginning again
There is no reasoning to the thing we call "life". What is the purpose of doing anything, we just die. To me dying is the best part of life, eternal happiness. There is no more hunger, no more being alone, no more being afraid, no more of anything that make people want to hurt their fellow man.
Don't complain or fell sorry for yourself for the things you don't have. Look at what you do have and feel grateful.
Being alone at night, when the room is dark and the silence overpowering-Reaching out to touch-only the emptyness-the longer and longer nights
I wonder if the rain is really God crying?
I believe that there is a total reasoning in life. There are times when it seems debatable but in the longrun, there is a reason for every season. We are put here for a purpose, to fufill something, wheather we see it or not.
!?From the soul?!.....my first glance into the mirror must have been taught chains surrounding my candy coated imagery loved for a material i shed my diamond and exist as the rough the soultry abyss thats been diluted so by this soluable of hatred and perplexing torment thats become my purgatory
"livelyhood" trapped in the ever contorted oubliette of my own passion i long for that of another my favorite blanket no longer keeps me warm and i know no other will suffice ART1 albuquerque nm
I have strayed from my spirituality in the past year and it has had a profound affect on my well-being. When I'm seeking the answers, when I need them the most, they're always retreating. But when I allow myself to let go, and just take each moment as it comes, they're so easily discovered.
Patience with myself and with the world is essential but oh-so-hard to find.
I have been going through self help for about the past year....sometimes willingly sometimes pushing myself somtimes dragging and kicking. I spoke with my sister today. It was nice. She seems to accept me for who I am. I definitely accept her for who she is, so why wouldn't she right? One day at
If there is a reason that we are living, why welcome death so soon? And why suicide? I know too many people that would rather commit suicide than try to live life in general...I have seen them fight the internal battle of who they are vs. society's idea of who they should be, and they would
rather die via suicide than conform...I do not see either way as noble. I would rather live and be myself(whoever I am) and find someone who is just as wonderfully phenomenally wacky as I am(there's BOUND to be someone!). THAT to me is part of living!
3 years ago I went suicidal, for many reasons. But through the support of friends and teachers I have come a very long way. As I look back on it all, I know it all happened for a reason. If I didn't go through what I went through, I wouldn't be as strong today and my life wouldn't be nearly as
good. The shell of something might seem terrible and disasterous but with time, the deep inner core can be strenghtening. I'm not saying being suicidal is a good thing...it is NOT...but it *has* made me stronger.
YES! I finally have the job I've wanted since July and the beginning of this month! It's factory work, yes, but I'll be more able to pay bills, etc.! Not that I want to do factory work forever; I don't. But still, it's better than low-income, stressful restaurant work.
I have vowed to follow my heart and follow my dreams... I know that when I am living "on purpose,"
God and the Universe will meet my needs.
I vow to listen to my soul and live an authentic life.
I started collecting quotes as a hobby back in Boston over 13 years ago. Now that I'm back "home" in Arizona I continue to collect...and share...quotes. Here are two recent acquisitions: "Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like no one is looking." And,
"Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful. If it's bad, it's experience."
Everyone has a moment in history which particually belongs to him. It is the moment when his emotions achieve their most powerful sway over him, and afterward when you say to this person "the world today" or "life" or "reality" he will asume that you mean this moment, even if it is fifty years
past. From "A Seperate Peace" by John Knowles.
I found this quote quite interesting. Its not every day someone actually thinks to that depth now is it? Kim
I am 14 years old and even though I haven't been living long I have learnd a lot about life. I learned that everywhere in life there are going to people that down you, and say that you aren't good enough, so in life I learned that I have to give not only my all but more, but I know in the end I
will make it. Even though I wan't to give up I keep going, cause I know that tomorrow the sun will shine a little bit brighter with that extra ray of light that will give me the hope that one day I will be on top. I could always cry when the world lets me down but I it hold in and us the hurt and
anger as more power to do my best. I also have faith in god. Some say that prayer doesn't help and it is a wate of time. Some say that god won't love them because of what they have done in there life, but god will always love you. He doesn't hate the person he hates the sin. He will always be there
to listen no matter what you have done. So pray to god and you will start to see that extra bright ray of sun in the morning. God bless!!!
My thoughts..... HHHMMMMMM .... I have so many! You know the ones about how do I get through another day when the last several days have wiped me out. Or how do I out of bed when I want so desperately to still be deep asleep. 2 years ago, my life was not close to what I wanted life to be. I was
unhappy, and fearful, and angry - that I didn't know what to change in my life. I didn't even know where to start or what was wrong. Then I found my faith and made a decision that changed my life. I guess you could say I have a motto I carry withing me concerning life ...... That decision was not to
do ANYTHING that I wouldn't do if it did not make my soul sing. You see music makes my soul sing, the laughter of children, and long passionate thunderstorms, and waves lapping upon my feet - the joys that God put here to enjoy. These are some of the things that make my soul sing. I chose from now
on to do only those things that I would do if I so rich that all of my friends and family were taken care of - what would i do? As I have answered that question over and over again - I have found that those are the things I do. Yes, it is hard, some of the things that make my soul sing require lots
of hard work. Like school - I enjoy it so much but I have no social life. I love my job and everyone knows a job means responsibilty and commitment - even on days I would rather be on the beach. Somedays when I am in bed not wanting to leave the haven of blankets i must ask myself - So, will staying
in bed make your soul sing?
Dear Lord, please watch over my mother tonight. Please help her to heal. Please bring her back home to us soon.
We love her so much!
the feel of the wind and watching the wind in the trees can give the greatest peace. sunny
i feel so confused i have everything i could possibly want but there is that one thing i'm missing. all i could ask for is that one phone call from that one special person, we could have so much fun together. i just wish he wanted it as much as i do. well until we meet again i'll keep praying
Today, I visited my omcologist for an update on my condidtion, which is an advanced melanoma. There was lot controversey about the diagnosis of my condition six years ago, but I have been very assertive about getting treayment and tried to put my bitter thoughts behind me. That said, I'm not
having a particularly hard time dealing with idea if dying, but about the circumstances, ssuch as the loss ofvarious functions. I swrite in my dail journal but it doesn't seem to work. mombarb0224 2aol.com
hi i'm just getting ready to leave for cross country practice i love running. it is so spiritual. i just wish more people would realize it. i'm starting another school year tomarrow but i'm kinda looking forward to it, i'm just going to enjoy each day and take it for what it's worth.
Why do we allow ourselves to get so bogged down with trivia and the mundane? Why do we willingly become overly involved in another individual's drama and trauma? When will we realize what is truly precious and savor each moment? Relish the present; it's all we have!
Be careful where you step...Watch what you eat...Sleep with a light and you got it beat.<p> Snow is gonna come...Frost is gonna bite,my old car froze up last night. I'm not gonna hang my head,because I could wake up in the morning dead. Dave
Today the beginning of a three day holiday. Hot and must stay in. Catching up on laundry, got shopping done. Getting time to read and do internet. Got a date with husband tommorrow. THings look good. Renee'
Everyday he came down the stairs. Everyday he said the same words to me: " Close those curtains". He did not like the sun coming in through the windows of the new sunroom I had built in his absence. " it makes the room hot" he kept commenting, though he never sat there and though the room was
never hot. The moment the curtains were opened he would shout: " pull them down, pull them down" with a fervor as if something bad was about to come in through the
windows. HIS HOUSE was dark and cold, MY HOUSE was sunny and warm, a celebration of light and color and everything that was beauty and energy.
It was not the state of our house, it was the state of our minds. His was a dark chamber, full of forbiddens and taboos. Things were inherently bad, shameful and evil.
I drew the curtains. I remembered the last time I was with Zack. He asked me: " Where are you now? ", " I see myself in a sunny place." I said. " Is it an island?" he inquired, somewhat worried. I looked around with my eyes closed as they are mostly when I am with him : " No, I
do not think it is a place on the map, I think it is a place in the mind." , " Yes" he whispered to me and I could feel his smile " Yes, Now you are where you should be."
I set down the thermostat of our central air conditioning. I AM FREE. I was born free, no one can put limits on my dreams , thoughts or emotions but me. The 'institution' maybe able to control various parts of my body and psyche at different times, but nobody can cover the sun
that is shining inside me. No one can stop the songs in my heart, the colours of my mind. There is only one real prison in this world ; the one we capture ourselves in.
I pray that my dreams will be realized in the very near future.
My husband of eighteen years was killed in an auto accident last year. The resulting chaos and revelations have led me to a spiritual crises, the likes of which I have never known. There have been days when the pros of taking my life have outweighed the cons.
This is not a matter of missing my husband. It is the realization of how unhappy and abnormal our life together had been. I had adapted to and loved a man who could not love me in return, no matter how much I wanted to believe he cared.
My husband kept many secrets from me, many of which have resulted in my being sued and having to pay penalties throughout these months following his death. My future is being snatched away piece by piece.
Beyond the belief that my two precious children were meant to be born, I have no idea as to my purpose in life. Nothing seems to matter. My only comfort is knowing there are loving relatives who could raise my children, if necessary.
What drew me to this web site was the journaling aspect, which I happened to see mentioned in Health Magazine. I started journaling in January of this year, and have processed the main themes of my journals into several poems. These endeavors have helped me maintain my sanity
throughout this nightmare.
Thank you for taking the time to read this.
You have the devinity of gods, the purity of symbols, and the shortcomings of other mortals.
The mixture is potent.
I have just received the Lord again. I've done this many times, but have never followed through with it. But this time, things are different! I am seventeen years old and have never felt any better. I've had rough times and I've had easy times. Now I know exxactly what to do do and say and when
to say it. Signed: Muffy, Florida
So if I am doing the right thing, why do I hurt so much? He was bad for me and I made him go - for the first time I chose me over someone else. But now all I want is to take it back and hear him say he loves me and it's all a mistake. When someone chooses you it fills you up. When they un-choose
you, it leaves an empty sick place inside.
In the quiet though, when I let myself hear the voice which guides, it says just let go, please let it go. You have made room in your life for someone wonderful and now you only have to believe you deserve it.
I think that sounds worth working towards. T
I am thanking God for yet another outlet for my seemingly endless reservoir of dreams, thoughts, and overwhelming emotion. I thank God most of all for all the moments I am allowed to meet kindred spirits, as in this site. How absolutely wonderful that there is a forum such as this, and what
comfort I have found here tonight in souls bared, and in confidences shared. I find myself hopeful, yet still somewhat bewildered by the spiritual quest I began approximately 6 years ago and am convinced I shall always be on this quest, albeit in different lessons. I feel that the journey itself is
surely more important and fulfilling than the destination itself. *Marianne*
I have felt an aching in my soul for so long...I know that somewhere out there, true love awaits. I believe that my soul-mate exists, yet I have not met him. I get the distinct impression, both in my heart and in readings and horoscopes, that our paths may cross soon. I pray that I remain aware
of all that comes to pass every moment so that I do not unwittingly let long-awaited love and happiness slip away. My heart literally feels as if it is about to burst, aching with the love I long to give to the one person whom it was meant for. I do not want to regret one moment of my life, or wake
up to find one day that I had a chance at happiness and let it slip away. I feel as if everything in the world could fall away, as long as I was able to love to my full capacity, for eternity. I just wish it were happening in my life at this very moment, yet I know that all is revealed at the proper
time, all according to His divine plan. How I wish I were in that moment now, in love and loved in return, for this love to really be THE ONE I've hoped for and dreamed about for so long. Until then, I shall be living my life while carrying this love in my heart and anticipating the glorious moment
when I can share it all with that special, one-of-a-kind man. *Marianne*
I have visited this site often. The feelings expressed are beautiful. Thank goodness there is a place for positive reflection on everyday living. Everything in my life was perfect. I was doing what I wanted to do. I volunteer/help with children and child issues for my area. I love it. I thought I
had found my purpose. Then......In a few short weeks I became so ill. Ignoring the illness only made it worse. Now I'm forced to stay quiet and still (Not my style) so that I may recover. Why? I ask myself. Why did this happen now? I thought that what I was doing was important. Why have I been made
to stop everything? I guess this is my time to reflect on my path. I need to learn to be quiet and still and listen to my inner self. I thought I was doing that, but obviously I was wrong. Obviously, I was running to fast. Now I sit and listen. I sit and read the words in this site. I am still
learning, but this is a beautiful place to come and just....be. Thank you.
Hi! This is Diariest... I am here to add a little note of what is going on with me. I have no diary and I am due for one I feel naked and I feel very uncomfortable without a diary. From this day forward I will not run out of Diaries I will continue to have a diary . BEcause it is who I am .And it
is what I do.
I have the made the bold and courageous move to follow my dream. I know deep inside my heart that I have made the right decision. I am honoring my authentic self. I have total faith that God and the Universe will take care of me.
I am going through the most painful time of my life.I am thinking of divorcing husband I am a writer and I am gooin gthrough hell someone help me Write me at my web page http:Writerscloset.homestead.com
Today is the first day of the rest of my life. I vow to cherish every moment of every day.
Never ask anyone the question "What do you think I should do?" because only you know wht is right for you. cmj
Today I am beginning to see the sunshine through the clouds. You could say I'm waking up to all of my blessings.
Wow, I am thinking of thougts presented here today.
Life is worth living.
We are all connected to the light the source of goodness and truth.
peace be unto you all
What an incredibly beautiful fall day it is today! I am going to go for a joyous walk. *Diarist*
Remember to take a deep breath every time you see something beautiful. In time, you will learn to focus on the beauty in all things.
Diariest--Journalers: Inspiration for writing is in life. A Wheelbarrow, a flower, a window pane and even the things we look past: like the window sill. Life is inspiration. Writers only notice the things that others over look; I've been noticing things for ten years. I am young. I have more to
see. And when I don't see them--when something in me refuses to notice the little things, then I stare for hours at the big things and open my journal and write: "What do I want to write about?" I say, "I want to write about oceans and scents and mermaids. I want to write about broken homes and
hearts and pin cushions. I want to write about a grandmother making an afghan or a child building a house out of popsicle sticks. I want to write about stick men who talk and teach me how to write." Try that. Write what you want to write about. But remember: no matter what shade it comes in, no
matter how many words, how colorful or long or flowery: in the end, you are still writing about YOU, and how you notice things. Writing is all I have and I treasure it with my life. I will always treasure it. Without it, I'd crumble. If I don't write for three days, I get cranky. It is my free
therapy; my channel; my listener and complainer. But what's more: I am writing to me about me, and only I know it. I hope everyone sees pleasure in everything they write, even if it's what Kafka wrote from time to time, plus countless others: "I have no heart to write today." Tomorrow you will.
Hi! this is Diariest I am a old diary writer I have been writing for about 24 years And I am getting bored witht he same way of journaling BUt I will not stop writing in my journals,I just need some new ideas.Can anyone help me via-email me: Diariest@suite101.com And you can log on to my new
exciting web page: www.DearDiary1.homestead.com/JournalingSecrets.html Log into it you may find some useful info
i just stumbled onto this site, and i havent read yet what is about but i felt like venting. One day i'll be able to look in the mirror, breathe in the air, and learn to accept myself and live life once more, but the road inbetween is like the worse torture in the world. I've always gotten down
on myself but my determination ofself un happiness has manifested it self physically and mentally to extreme points, i look and feel like garbage and nothing seems to help me, i don't even know what keeps me going except for falling asleep and dreaming and the wish that one day i'll be what i was a
long time ago or just a version of my better self. Girlzrbad@hotmail.com Christopher
I pray that happier days find you soon. Perhaps prayer or some inspirational books would be of help to you at this time.
May God Bless You, Your Friend
At night after I tuck my 3 year old twin daughters in bed and they fall asleep, there are times when I go in there room to watch them. I think they are the most beautiful children in the world and I thank God for the precious gift he has given me. It helps to take away all of the days troubles.
Every day life presents opportunities for growth. We can choose a new path, or take a different road; or go off our own trail. Life offers unlimited chances for us. Our lives mirror what our thoughts create, we need to dwell in possibilties.
Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way. The Lord be with all of you. 2 Thessalonians:16
My thoughts today are sad. My father is ill, my brother's mother is ill, my partner's parents are ill.... I feel small and alone. Being a grown-up, taking responsibility, being the strong one is hard. I want to cry, but at the same time I seem unable to let go and weep. The wheel is turning and I
want to jump off for awhile.
The day is windy and winsome - perhaps a haircut awaits - or a lobotomy -
I had given up....let go. In doing so, I opened the door. Inner self was waiting, building my life for acceptance. Little over 3 months ago, this started to emerge. From despair to joy. From hate to love. From judgement to forgiveness. From fear to acceptance.
I look eagerly for what awaits, I listen and love ..... Keeping my face to the light.
Thank you for the opportunity to share.
Pray for our country today, that the right man be elected to lead us into the next century.
I will share the thought that this is a wonderful website and i thank the creators,editors,writers etc. who were involved. I have shared this site with some friends who are in need of a spiritual uplift. I think that in these times we are so wrapped up in everyday issues and other folks problems
that we tend to forget about ourselves! So this is such a blessing to have something so positive and i just want to let you know it is appreciated! Thanks for letting me share. Angie, CA
This is a day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it. Feel the sun on your face... Dd not be in a hurry. Did you know where you are going too? I do not mean work, school or home. Why are we here? Just too hang out or perhaps there is a deeper meaning. Every step we take bring us
closer towards a journey. A journey that has a beginning, and a end. There is a big picture, that I cannot fathom. We all have a part in that picture. These are some of my thoughts for today. I have faith in the Creator who knows the master plan.
My thought today is how short life is and how easy it is to be swayed off the path when you're not paying attention. I am having a lot of intense realizations that I am letting life pass me by. I feel sad because I know better and should do better. My spiritual life ought to come before
everything but I let is slide into the background. I've always tended to let people who don't have as much spiritual awareness as I do push me around, waste my time, manipulate my feelings, take my joy, etc. Mostly it's my family. I can't seem to let them go even though I know I must. God please
help me. Time is so short. I have to get on with my life now.
Life is hard when you can see a big piece of the big picture. Seeing where others are going (when they are going in the wrong direction) is very frustrating. Please God give me the wisdom and strenght and creativity to help them.
Finding your own personal mission statement-or running from monsters- There are alot of things in our world and thoughts which function as "monsters". There was a monster at one government job I worked call R.I.F.F. (Reduction in Federal Forces) There is another kind of monster in my life right
now that I cannot not label but the feeling of fear that monster's inspire is leering at me. \ But you know-some monsters just disappear when the lights are turned on-I think that just by taking the time to pause here and write-I just turned on a light. Feels better not running from monsters!
Hope somebody else out there finds a way to turn on a light and make it through another dark and monsterlike moment. Geneva
I am very happy to have found this website-On for the first time ever. I am always looking for new and creative ways to express myself and look inward. I had a good day today-productivity is so important to me at this stage. I own my business and I need new ways in which I can express myself in a
non-judgemental environment-THIS IS IT!! :)
When one gets ill with a supposedly terminal illness like cancer doctors should not take one's hope away. Prayer and hope in the miracles that Jesus performs even today helps the victim to live in a more possitive way.
Hi everyone...I feel so alone sometimes even though I am surrounded by so many wonderful and loving people. Every day I feel compassion for all those around me, and I make a genuine effort to see the good in everyone. I know so much how beautiful and precious this life is, I'm just going through
a challenging period in my life...I need to be strong, but most of all I must believe in myself. Why am I having such a hard time believing in myself? I've devoted so much energy to my spiritual and personal growth, and I love myself for that, and I love who I am. Its just that I lately I don't feel
a part of this world...and it creates confusion within myself. I'm continuously thinking about how beautiful life can be, and I wonder why everyone in the world can't see it that way...but at the same time, there is so much about the "real world" that I must learn to accept and integrate myself
into. I never want to lose who I am...How can I find a balance between my spiritual self and the hectic world around me?
I started a new job four months ago. The pay is the best I have ever received. I want so much to last here. But lately I've been a nervous wreck. I'm afraid my nerves are getting in the way of my job. I have always been uncomfortable around people, and it takes me a very long time to warm up to
them. I'm seeing a therapist to help me with my problem, but it takes time. I pray that I don't lose my job because of my fears. I wish I could make these feelings go away, I want so much for people to understand me. Everyday I wonder what they are thinking about me. Today I stated taking medication
for my anxiety, I hope it's not too late. How I would love to tell my co-workers of my problem, if I knew they would understand and not judge me because of it. I want to tell them all to give me some time. Please give me a chance. That's all I ask. If I am given the chance I can do it. God, hear my
hard work is taking the difficult option from the three available .yes, every problem comes with three options as solutions .no promlem is insurmountable it just requires hard work for a solution!!!!! rohit
To the "Nervous Wreck" Journalist, I feel your pain. You must believe in yourself and learn to put your feelings before your coworkers. We all have insecurities in life. It doesn't matter what your coworkers think of you. What matters most is what you think of you. Smile. Tell yourself you're
great! Because you are! And do your job with pride for the special soul you are and for the special gifts you bring into this world! You are a gift from God. Remember that!
Just be your best, and let the Universe do the rest!
My fiancee and I perform weddings in "Paradise." At least that's what we call the gorgeous Emerald Coast of Florida. We conduct ceremonies in Panama City Beach, FL (or home base) or travel anywhere on the coast from New Orleans to Charleston to ? Thus, the name of our website www.coastalwed.com.
Your website is breathtaking. It seems a perfect venue for services such as ours. I don't really know where I'm going with this, except that I believe there is a mutual inspiration to share. Your thoughts and comments are most welcome! Best regards, Bobbie Wilson
Kathleen, I am so grateful to have found this site. The support center that I volunteer for (New Hope Healing Institute found at nhhi.net) is putting together a writing group for survivors of childhood abuse and look forward to exploring some of your writings in preparation. Finding materials
specifically geared for what we need has been difficult. Thanks, Kim
"Two Questions, Two Answers
Q. How long do we have? A. As long as it takes
Q. How much do we get? A. As much as we need." Richard Stine
Whatever journey we may be on...all that happens is for the good and growth of our soul. All who we encounter teach us more about about ourselves. Be not sad of endings as they open but one more door to your soul. Walk in and experience the wisdom waiting there. And always listen, listen to the
voice of your soul which will always provide insight for your next adventure. In light and love, continue living, for those who have gone before.
We must Be the Change we wish to See
Today I feel strange - I enjoy being around him and he treats me so good but I feel that we are not right for each other at some times and at other times we are the only 2 people in the world that matter. He is not what my parents would pick for me but he is certainly special - do I really love
him or the idea of being with him - isn't that love?
I knew what I wanted but chose to do what I though was right but it wasn't and now I stand alone. I wish I could go back and fix what I have done but I know i'm now only left with this feeling of pain which I can't explain.] Diana
People say not to ask others what to do because only you should know but I don't realize that I have even half the options I have entil someone else tells them to me. I have made many discoveries this way. ~D~
These are my thoughts about life. Life is full of jubiliation and enjoyable when you think about some one who is close to you by heart and if that person is not with you then it becomes a tragedy.The situations get even worse when that person for no reason , just to give relief to his/her self
does not give you proper response. and the things go on in that selfish and greedy way.
NEED HELP IN KNOWIN HOW TO JOURNAL ___________________________________
Do you get stuck on what to write well you can go to my Diary club Just go to yahoo Click the " Clubs" logo and find the jouranls and Diaries The title of my club is DiariestPages I have alot of info that may help those that are experts and those that are just beginning We all
can learn something. Sign Diariest
Sometimes you have to do what you don't want to do to be were you want to be.
I buried my brother 11/22/00. He was only 48 and died suddenly from a blood clot. The holidays will never be the same. Since he lived in another city, we only saw him on holidays and his laughter and smile made our time together so special. He was loved by so many and touched many lives. He will
be missed but remembered with fond memories. He left behind a healthy 78yr. old mom, me at 53 and two other sisters at 40 and 39. He did not have any children. His wife will be lost without him. Every room in their home tells you he was there. This is a sad time for us all. I will look at life in a
new way. Joan email@example.com
everything happens for a reason.
Dear Joan, My heart goes out to you and your family. May God bless you.
For those who are confused or frightened, busy or torn, or simply lost or unsure in the complexities of daily life, always remember...
"And still I tell you, one must have chaos in oneself to give birth to a dancing star." -Friedrich Nietzch
This is a quote of a gem I read recently:
"You don't have to win the lottery to pursue your dreams. You need to start walking in that direction and let
circumstances, the environment and the universe support you. Then let it come." Maizie
Nov 26,2000 Today i am going through some trying times.Ive been seperated from my children for almost a year now, and the pain is getting great almost unbearable.Ive been asking their father for visits only to get, denied every time.So today at church there was a little boy and girl attending
service and the children favored my children soo much that it brought tears to my soul not just my eyes.And with this pain in my heart my cries to the lord are more louder, desparate and meaningful because I know in my heart im not just going through to teach me a lesson.I know that my god has
brought me closer to him for a reason but it still hurts,even as i write this page tears threaten to run down my face.So i know i have to be strong and hold on and Wait on the lord.One more thing i wanted to add is ,im very thank-ful i found this page since im at work with no one to talk to even
though i wouldnt share this with anybody anyway,so this page has been a comforter to me tonite and pray that anyone else who may a comforter finds this page also. *And remeber gods loves you even when you dont love yourself*Africa.H
I could NEVER leave my child to be cared for by someone else. If at all humanly possible, I will do anything for my child. The child came from my womb, so how could I give my child away even if I were ill. I would find a way.
There is nothing like that first cup of hot coffee in the morning and today I am thankful for it. simple pleasures
With finals approaching/unprepared, working 2 jobs (1 full time/1 part time) and haven't had a day off in 3 months, not even a weekend. Why do I do this too myself. And, the inner voice told me 2 weeks ago to at least quit the part timer or wierd things would start to happen. 3 days later while
driving on a service road, I went to sleep for about 5 seconds and ended up in the lane of incoming traffic/but that voice, that inward voice kept me on the planet a little longer. All praises due to God. And I listening now without having another brick thrown to get my attention Judie Graham-Davis
I am grateful for this beautiful site to come and share with all of you. I am new here & just exploring around. Have journaled for many years and plan to continue for many more. Indeed, journaling is a sacred art form to be performed in your own sacred space. I believe I must be between
journaling by hand and by computer LOL! Lately, I am finding so many, many beautiful sites in which to journal by computer that it is becoming very tempting! Love & Blessings, Sherry
I have been becoming more and more aware that it is time to examine the role that material objects have in my life. It seems that the energy I used to use for creative purposes is now being used to focus on material objects and how to obtain them.
Love is being spread so magically. It feels great to be love itself, walking and breathing and living in that love and radiating it out to all who graces our path. Beautiful warm loving site you have here. Keep shining dear hearts.
With Lovelight and Warm Hugs, Sandy Lee Jones
I am in web which I have built inside my soul for 38 years. I am having difficulty cutting through it to let the little girl in me be free.
Where do I begin....
I'm 47, never been married, no kids, I've loved many, but no one wants loves me back. What is the point of being here? I've lost interest in going on. Good bye..............
I am most grateful to have found this journaling site for my online thoughts of the day. Presently, I am a "lap" journaler with my favorite pens, books & paper! I enjoy my computer, too, & this just may be the site I am looking for!
"Face your fear, and it will disappear."
I am not there yet, but this is my goal. Thank you for this site - a seeming oasis for kindred spirits.
Visiting loved ones in the hospital is so, so difficult.
Today I finally feel like there is a reason im alive so now i am willing to live life with purpose and meaning and to be grateful for what i do have and what i dont i can have faith that i will recieve it.Africa
Such a beautiful "space" to come & share. Most special.
Love & Blessings, Sherry
*My Thought For Today* Live today as if it were your last. Love someone as if they were your first. Hold on to love as if your life dedpened on it. Pray harder to God today then you did yesterday. Be grateful today for what you do have,and what you need have faith and believe that you will
recieve. May God bless and keep you.Africa
Today I feel empty; gray and empty. Really, I think my self has left my body; gone to a place where there it can do impoptant things, like smile, laugh, fly kites.
Icomplain that people do not laugh. When i look back i see my name in the no-laughers list! I realized that and from that day i make sure i am passing 5 smiles to strangers. Believe me it helps.
G vishwanath firstname.lastname@example.org
Today I do not feel like myself... A certain unhappy, tired and gray feeling ha taken over my body. I pray that tomorrow I may feel like myself again.
I wish I wasn't so afraid. Everything scares me. Everybody frightens me. I feel as if they are laughting at me. I want so much to be liked and respected. Sometimes I feel that it doesn't pay to be too good. This world isn't very kind to those of us who are too good, too shy or too quiet. I wish I
could be more outspoken. But most of all, I wish people would like me for just me.
Wow, this is really special. This page just came to me from my eTour site. I have been messmerized by all the wonderful reading and sharing I have 'witnessed'. A very special touch. Today has been filled with fun for me. Very cold, very sunny, my heart full. Doing my pleasant paper route job,
visiting my husband at his work, talking to my daughter on the phone, teasing my son about eating all my good snacks. Checking out his brother's new addition to their room, surround sound for their movies. Yes! And then just before I go to bed, to be soothed to peacefulness by this website. Wow
again. I believe in a Higher Power when I am touched like this. Maree at email@example.com
We r all searching for inner happiness.And life is made up of little salty & spicy little incidences and that brings with a lot more words of cheer. Today I feel we are living our lives with a deepest desire to be loved by all.And in that true search of happiness we are being chasing ourselves
behing earthly stuffs.We do our duty ,no more as our responsibility.But in the pursuit of new search for happiness.The mothernatures wonders are the true gifts for human beings.We are one & our society is where you have to put your 1% effort for its resurction in a new tone.Life is a school and each
human life are its different class rooms.This is the fruit of a lifetime .And you must live through your thoughts and then follow through... ABYSKARIA S/O P.K.SKARIA PLAPPILLIL HOUSE 38/2497 KALOOR.P .O COCHIN-682017 KERALA INDIA PH:0091484323898 ABYSWORLD@YAHOO.COM
I believe in magic. I believe in dreams. I believe that only I can hurt me. I believe that this life is a path which I must travel. I believe that sometimes I am the teacher and sometimes I am the student. I believe that when I realize how far I've come, I also realize how very far I have to go.
I believe there are no bad souls although there are bad people. I believe that someday I will again look into the eyes of the woman seen only in a dream and we can walk the path together. I believe that love and knowledge are all I really have to give. I believe that my next life will be more
difficult than this one, though sometimes that seems impossible. I believe that you all have beautiful souls and I am happy to be living at the same time as you. firstname.lastname@example.org
Need to get the juices flowing as far as my Personal Journal at home.I have been writing for 25 years and I feel I write the same things over again
Today I reflected that even after being angry with a boss for some time, I am pleased I can recognise his good points. I am pleased that I can appreciate the good with the bad. A few years ago this would not have been possible for me. I would have been a prisoner of my thoughts but today I felt a
new kind of freedom. Please let it carry over until tomorrow.
I feel I am at a turning point. The world I knew as a young girl is drifting away. The new world is still yet to be formed. My parents are older. My sisters are married, my brother lives away. I too am married but I do not have any children. I have a connection to work that is like a frayed
thread, I am hanging in there but I do not know why - probably money. My friendships are changing. The me who I once protrayed is no longer the me I am. My relationships mirror back to me someone I am not always sure that I like. An Astrologer says its because Pluto is opposing Mars. Me - I am not
sure. I am searching for answers but I know if I just sit still, meditate and listen, they are in there waiting to find the way to my awareness.
Living 0r Working god --------------------- (*)Love , grace of God... (*)Messenger of love,peace... (*)love,happiness of lifetime... -->Oldest of living or creation (*)Temple of wisdom (*)God of church
1.word of cheer 2.man of actions 3.web of life or www 4.whisper of dreams 5.faith of believer 6.teacher of life 7.guide of all 8.gallery of perspiration 9.voice of everybody 10.nature of wonders 11.peace of mind 12.gratness in all 13.calls upon you
BY ABY SKARIA S/0 P.K.SKARIA 38/2497 KALOOR.P.O COCHIN-682017 KERALA INDIA ph:0091-484-323898 email: LOVETHEGODINLOVE@YAHOO.COM
Once there was a girl who lived on the edge of a deep, deep, Love. She had beautiful golden hair, but her feet were dirty from walking in the mud and her hands were dirty from the job that she had, so her face was always dirty too.
One day she decided to take a walk in the deep, deep, Love, even though her mother and all her friends had told her “not to bother;” or there was “no point,” and even tried to convince her that the deep, deep, Love “didn’t really exist”!
She hadn’t gone very far, when she came upon a House with many Rooms. A little frightened, she entered through the Open Door and looked around.
The first thing she saw was a table with Bread and Wine on it. Feeling Hungry and realizing just how Thirsty she had become, she broke off some of the Bread and ate it. She then drank some of the Wine and was surprised to find that, no matter how much she drank, the glass was always full!
Goldilocks walked a bit further and found a table full of Fruit. Some of the Fruit was very exotic and she had never seen it before. Some she recognized but had never tried, so decided to sample some of these and then move on.
Next she came to a table laden with every kind of food and drink she could possibly imagine. She rushed up to a big chair that was at the head of it, sat down, and started trying things eagerly. But after all she had already eaten, she was feeling rather sleepy so, curling up on the big seat, she
fell into a Peaceful sleep.
Not long after, the Owner of the House returned. Seeing the Broken Bread, the Son said, in his normal voice, “Who’s been eating from MY table?”. Seeing a little pile of fruit pieces, the Spirit said in his still, small voice, “Who’s been eating from MY table?”. Then, in His big, big voice, the
Father said “WHO’S BEEN EATING AT MY TABLE?” and sent the spirit rushing to look.
At the sound like thunder and a rushing wind, Goldilocks woke up and was very frightened. When she saw the Owner, she began to cry with shame and guilt.
“Don’t be afraid,” said the Son, stooping down and washing her feet. (She knew she would never walk in the mud again.)
“ Don’t be afraid,” said the Spirit, taking her hands and making them clean. (She knew they would find other work now.)
“Don’t be afraid,” said the Father, wiping the tears from her eyes and making her face shine like the sun. (She knew she would never be the same again.)
Goldilocks wasn’t afraid any more, but ran back to tell her mother, and all her friends, of everything she had found at the Heart of the deep, deep, Love.
soulful listening- I usually sit at the computer and do my daily things in a specific order. Today I heard from my spirit--do it this way. I was dooing my daily clickings on The Hungersite etc. usually never really seeing the sites that are donating. But something or someone who knew I needed
encouragement made to see soullfuliving.com Thank you spirit. I needed this today.
This is a great site. It really helps everyone that goes on it to get entact with their spiritual side. So I really like this site. It just really opens me up.
I often find myself thinking of what could've been, what should've been and what use to be. I look in every direction for who I am and who I want to be, but I don't see me. I avoid looking to the future because I'm scared of standing there looking back on what is still yet to come and regretting
that I haven't yet accomplished what I thought should be. I don't know how I need to get to where I think I need to go and I don't really know who I need to be once I get there. So every day, I wake to face the bitter chill of the day, the sky a solemn gray, the wind cold and piercing against my
warm exposed skin, bringing water to my eyes. All the while forgetting what I am about, wrapped up in the hustle and bustle of the corporate world. This is not me I scream soundlessly. I undress and climb deep within the cover of my bed, have I forgotten the only important thing in this world, the
only thing that will truly bring me joy. The place I long to be is in the vale of happiness, where content with the things I have is good enough, and the longing for things I yet to have is merely a fleeting muse. That shall be my goal, that shall be where I go, that shall be who I am to become, for
I Anna K. deserve that, long for that and will find serenity in that-HAPPINESS, has anybody else forgotten?
Anna K. Atlanta, GA
About a month ago I made the difficult decision to kill myself. I didn't want to, but there seemed to be no other option available. I am a passionate person, passionate about life and about others, but I am unable to find that same amount of passion for myself. I am filled with so much
self-hatred that I can scarcely tolerate residing within my own body.
I knew my husband would be away until late evening, so I went to one store and purchased a bottle of sleeping pills. Then, I went to another store and purchased alcohol. I went home, looked around my house and within myself. I felt an emptiness that was so profound I thought my heart might break. I
took the bottle of sleeping pills and I started drinking. I didn't stop until I could no longer resist the urge to close my eyes...
The rest of the evening is a mystery. I have wisps of memories that exist only through a heavy fog. I remember waking up and being unable to move my limbs. I remember being very scared. I remember hearing two voices whispering to each other, almost inaudibly. All I was able to make out was ...
"There she is." I remember trying hard to stay awake out of pure fear. I remember my husband coming home. I remember trying to talk to him but being unable to clearly articulate anything. I remember the hospital, being hooked up to an IV, being catheterized, being made to drink something as black
and thick as tar. I remember straining to overhear bits and pieces of hushed conversations between my husband and the doctor. I remember sleeping... After a couple days of medical monitoring, I stayed on the psychiatric ward for a four-day "suicide watch."
Nothing like this has ever happened to me. I have always walked the "straight and narrow." I have always done what was expected of me and have strived toward one achievement after another: First, running away from home and joining the military at age 17. Then, working and paying my way through my
Associate's degree, my Bachelor's degree, my Master's degree -- and finally beginning my Ph.D. But, I found that the faster I danced and the more I worked to 'attain,' the more my self-hatred demanded acknowledgement, refusing to be ignored, until I finally gave into it.
I am grateful that my husband found me and was able to give me a second chance to heal my self-inflicted wounds. But, I don't know where to begin. I found this web-site, filled with so many beautiful images and thoughts shared by others, and I thought perhaps I might begin my journey here. --
I pray every day that I may touch a life and lead them in the path to Him who strengthens all of us.
I am grateful that I work in a loving, peaceful environment. I thank God for my enlightened co-workers, knowing I came in this place needy for their company. Michael, Franklin and Roxie, you bless me with friendship, acceptance and support every day. Let me show you continuously how much it means
to me. Debra
PEACE AND LIGHT AND JOY TO ALL BREATHE BREATHE
The longer I live, the more I realize that the challenges I face each day are there to help me grow and move me further along the path to enlightenment. Chanting Nam-myo-ho-renge-kyo has helped to guide me in this journey. I am so grateful to have encountered this wonderful Buddhist practice.
**************************************************** Here is something I wrote a few years back. It seams to fit here. This is a great website, and for a great cause.
To Steal Passion
Circle him, memorize him, Glimpse his face upon every head, Listen for the slightest mumble of his voice, Hear luring whispers crowd your mind; Approach a cliff... Dive into the thick enveloping atmosphere, Pray for a harmless landing, Smell a billion roses bloom at once, Roll in them, kill them,
bleed to death.
--Kristol Unterseher ****************************************************
Love isn't just about being with the person during just good times. Love is through thick and thin, dark and light. I almost considered leaving him because his work is taking up so much time. Yet, I know.. even at work he is thinking of me, just as much as I think about him. And had things been
the other way around he would wait the world for me!
Live life as if it's your last day! Rejoice in the feeling of just "being" here. Stop to cherish the words of a child, or throw a toy for a pup! Remember the reason for the season of Christmas. "Make of yourself a light" (Buddha)
your friend in Christ, Gayle
...blank space, blanket of snow...cold, insulating the feelings that burn my heart...a soul torn in half, once danced in the moonlight in the waves of time...now it cries, I cry from my soul, for the moon on the water, for my friend,....I miss my friend and the tears do not stop,,,adding to the
frozen bars of ice that encase my heart this Solstice night,,,,I pray for spring, for rebirth, for forgivness......
I have always thought that self-knowledge was one of the keys to soulful living. I think this passage by Kahlil Gilbran (1923) is especially salient: "Your hearts know in silence the secrets of the days and the nights. But your ears thirst for the sound of your heart's knowledge. You would know
in words that which you have always known in thought. You would touch with your fingers the naked body of your dreams...And the treasure of your infinite depths would be revealed to your eyes...For self is a sea boundless and measureless." -- Soulbroken
It truly is food for our souls reading the features each month. I do hope these will continue as they are so needed in our world today for our spiritual growth. Christmas Blessings, Sherry
hey whoever im writing to i dont really no wat to ritebut i really wanted to find sum kool poetry
So this is Christmas....my second away from family and friends, my second at home with my hubby and daughter. I look into their eyes and I know I was given a wonderful gift that many are longing for. I send the love that I feel out into the universe and ask the Divine to erase
the loneliness that many people are feeling on this day. ~Dionne
Don't keep loneliness to yourself!
At this time of year i tend to look back over the year and take stock in my life... i find myself feeling like i have wasted so much of the precious gift of life... wasted it alone watching tv... working... i feel like i have failed at the things that mean most... i am single... no prospects...
no children. And i sit inside and hide away from life... my professional life is successful... degrees... good job... but my personal life is unfulfilled... and my spiritual life is too... somehow i know these are related... but i seem paralyzed by fear... fear of living...and at the same time i
mourn the passing time. That is my 'resolution' for the new year... taking baby steps toward enriching my spiritual and personal lives... brick by brick working on taking down the wall i've erected around myself. Not to waste the precious, precious gift of life...to find the joy in the blessings i
have, and not to focus on the things i do not have.
"Your brain is much better than you think." Quote taken from the book "How to Think Like Leonardo da Vinci". An excellent book with accompanying workbook/journal. I recommend it.
Marilynn Karbonski, Carlton, Oregon
Better to use darkness then to curse it. Ask; How can I utilize this? What is the gift in this? What could be great in this?
This is the year for everyone to have fun. It's 2001 !!!! "You only live once-but if you work it right, once is enough." Joe E. Lewis
Our thoughts DO make a difference. If we can touch just one empty soul with a shaking of hope...everything else for that day is gravy.
R.A. Posner Tokyo, Japan
Ask me about Joy and I'll tell you stories hours long> Ask me about Dreams and I'll paint you pictures to fill galleries> Ask me about pain and I'll write you pages to fill books> Ask me about Love and I'll tell you about Joy, Dreams, and Pain.......Logan..... email@example.com
"When I was a child....A small bird died in my hand...My mother said I had held it too tightly.....I guess it was because I loved it too much....Often with you, I feel like that child again...and I'm afraid." Logan....firstname.lastname@example.org
"A candle glows> but lights not the distance> To the corners darkness our candle cannot go> We hold the breath> That will destroy the life> That by itself is slowly dying> The beauty of each flicker> The journey of each flame...must end> Infinity lasts not in the glow of our candle."
Take time to share a moment to yourself, relax in the inner peace of your thoughts, and then share your life with other by serving and making others feel better about themselves.
I am in love with a man who will probably never love me again. I wish love could be buried as easy as we bury humans once they leave us. My life now is full of hurt tears pain and suffering. Why? That is all I want to know. Its all over the fact that she has money and materialistic things and all
I had for you was love that will never end. I cant seem to put two and two together to figure out what went wrong. You are my every waking thought. I would die and live this hell filled life all over again just to relive the moments we shared. I love you so much. I know you will Never ever read this
but it is ok. I remember everything as if it yesterday. I havent forgot anything you ever said to me or the way I felt when I first seen you. I cant express the way I burn to just hear your voice in my little ear.I need you I feel as if I dont want to go on any longer without you. I wonder if you
are happy if you are being taken care of like I took care of you back then. I wonder if you make her laugh the way you made me. I miss you in every aspect. I sit here and cry after 8 months of agonizing lonelyness thinking maybe one strange day you will call me up like before and say those exact
words again, " I didn't realize I broke your heart" I pray that we will be together again and God will heal my broken heart! Tina
Remember: Some lessons must be learned in the calm, and some in the storm.
In moments of silence I learn so much. It is in these moments that I realize how blessed I am just to be.
In life we rarely are conscious of those we meet within our journey that have been placed in our paths as teachers. When we do let us bow graciously to them and praise God for the opportunity.
The way each day will look to you all starts with who you're looking to.
In the year 2001 I will set my priorities as they were always intended to be. God, Family, Career. As a single parent with no help from their father for most of my now grown childrens' lives my job came first. I thought I was doing the "right" thing to keep food on the table and a roof over our
heads. But I know now that what I taught them was work came before anything else and that makes me sad. In 2001 I, with the help of God, will reteach myself and my children about priorities. God, Family, Job, because with God as my first priority all others will follow in the direction it is meant
to be. I will be successful in my career because I will put God in control of my life and I know He will guide me in the right direction
There are times when the oppressing of time and place will undergo and you'll feel as lost as a child but don't ever consider the possibility of growning old in a dimension that only reads your actions.
Inpossibilities vanish when a person and there God confront a mountain
Sometimes I feel that life is passing me by, the older that I get. Therefore, I vow to take all that life offers me in the way of opportunities, & to grow more as a knowledgeable person. Don't let life slow you down - explore!! Cathy McIvor
"If there is a universal truth, then there must be universal laws...infinite laws of life, far beyond the laws of a nation. When the infinite laws are broken, your soul must serve time... a ' sentence ' handed down by you. The hell that goes on inside a tormented soul, who has violated the
natural laws of the universe, is more horrific than any penance God would ever put forth on one of his children. You make your own hell on earth."
"If people could just remember that religion was created by man, not God. Many times, organized religion is more about raising funds than raising spiritual awareness." Amanda......Last Night An Angel Stopped By.....
"Hold dearly to your dreams...For within their reality lies mans greatest hope." Tearabar
"If only the sands beneath my feet, could have lasted longer than the moment I stood." Tearabar
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the diffrence."
For those of you waiting for your Prince Charming.....yes he IS out there....you will get to him eventually. Maybe it's time to change thoughts from "I'm going to go FIND the right person" to "I'm going to go BE the right person"........ I am pregnant! After over 2 years of trying to conceive, my
husband and I are expecting our third baby. This is the greatest proof of God's existence ever! I am happy.
We too often love things and use people, when we should be using things and loving people
Always remember that love is one of the greatest gifts that mankind can share and that it should never be taken advantage of. For when you take advantage of love you are only betraying yourself.
I sit here "alone" and wonder where you are tonight. Looking outside, the sky fades from dark blue to black. The veiw is like an icescape from some alien planet....strangly reflective of how I feel inside. I've been searching for you for so long. I don't think I need you but I want you more than
I would have thought possible a few short years ago. If I could just look into those eyes again, I could live a lifetime in a moment. I shall go on searching and waiting. I would wait a thousand lifetimes for you...I love you email@example.com
The spiritul life is a reaching out to our innermost self,to our fellow human beings and to our God.
Henri J.M. Nouwen
There have been times when I have been very busy. I have prayed for things to slow down. Now that things aren't that busy, I want nothing more than to be busy. Time seems to stand still when I have nothing to do. It goes by quickly when there's is much to be done. At home there is plenty that I
can take care of, but after a day of working outside I am not up to doing anything at home. I get some dinner, watch some tv, maybe go on the computer and than go to bed. I would like to do something else with my life. But what? I love to write. But lately I can't think of a single thing to write
about. So here I am writing about boredom. I have five and a half hours to go before I get out of work. Well, I guess I should look at the bright side, at least I'm getting paid. But I sure would love to be doing something more productive. One day I will be overwhelmed with work, and I will pray
once again, for nothing to do. Maybe I'll read some of the other entries, they are probably more interesting than this one.
I ENJOYED MY LIFE, ESPECIALLY THE TIMES I HAVE READ A GOOD SCRIPTURE AND SOOTHE MY FEELINGS INTO THE SCRIPTURE. ALSO OF HAPPY TIMES WHEN I HAVE MEMORIES OF MY MOTHER, WHO PASSED ON 3 1/2 YRS AGO. SOMETIMES ITS HARD, BUT I THINK OF THE LOVE AND INSPIRATION THAT SHE GAVE TO HER ENTIRE FAMILY. PAT
I believe in the laughter. I believe in the love. I believe in the shared spirit. I believe in this our dream of joy.
All you need is deep within you waiting to unfold and reveal itself. All you have to do is be still and take time to seek for what is within, and you will surely find it
About unhealty food.
Did you know toxid foods creats toxid thoughts? Do you know God created us to be breatherians? Do you know all foods and drinks are a deadly poison for the human mind and body? Did you know that God is now instructing thousands of people to be breatherians. God want our body to be 100% clean inside
and our thoughts must be 100% pure loving and our actions 100% pure loving. Our birthright is endless happiness, inmortality, love and joy. Living on earth is ment to be a paradise. We are nothing more than shadows of our true self. I want to cry when I think what we have done to ourselfs. We are
all very, very holy, yes we are gods in flesh and blood and should treat ourself us gods. We forgot for a long time to think for our- selves . We are indocrinatet from birth with so mutch crap about being an human.The human is not an animal, she is a holy spirit, only a holy spirit. By the way my
name is Kerstin and I have had a very intense spiritual awakning since for years ago and I want to tell you about it.
"He drew a circle that shut me out.....Oh what a tremendous thing to flout....But wit and I had the will to win....We drew a circle that took him in."
"If God created anything better than the woman.......He surely kept it for Himself." Logan...tearabar.com
I have just discovered this site. It is wonderful and it allows people to do something that is much needed by all of us; the opportunity to voice our thoughts, especially the thoughts that we have been conditioned not to voice because they may indicate our weaknesses. Which, is a no no in our
society. I will be back to join in. Peace and love to you all.
Life is to short, you should be thankful everyday for what you have, And make everyday worth living, because the most important thing in life is to be happy and to love
In the recent past substance abuse played a big part of me life that im now changing for the better than to a support group and god. I know what I suppose to be doing in life do you?
everything is up, then down...life is full of contradictions...nothing remains the same...everything is forever changing...
The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and covenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy
Speaking about tomorrow, if it is the Lord's will, we will live to do this or that. James 4:15 Then when we plan,we should plan according to the Lord's will for our lives.
Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way. My prayer for all of you.
God's grace be with you all.
The saddest kind of lonely, is when you feel alone in the presence of your mate...invisible...as though he is looking past you, and not at you...as though you are talking to yourself, and not with another...as though he is making love to just any old vagina, and not to you.
You are not alone. There are many of us in the same situation, but this too shall pass.
It's funny how everyone in my life thinks that everything is great. My heart has been torn in a million pieces by him, and I am simply wearing the jolly minstrel's mask.
I have been feeling so so sad lately. The tears run down my face and I cannot make them stop.
"Many times I have loved...... For the moment- and for tomorrow. Through it all I have learned that only the moment- is for certain..." Logan Clarke......www.tearabar.com
Seems like you can't always get what you want, You're bound to have heartbreak some days. You can always smile, but you will still have a tear... Right in your heart....A piece of your soul always seems to depart... So therefore, look at the moonlight, And be glad you're
An intimate relationship must be a wonderful thing. Perhaps someday, somewhere, someone will truly love me. After all these years, the only thing I can say about my relationships with women that I have had feelings towards is "LOVE STINKS" Joe
The world will never end, No matter how much you want it to... The world will go on.... So believe in your heart- And you will succeed. ~smileygirl1702
I used to be depressed by my depression. Now that I understand that is normal as a "transition of emotions" and why this is so, I am fascinated by how we live it and how we change it. I appreciate more and more the insights friends and others have shared with me throughout
my life. Knowledge of what the dual soul and spirit are has changed my life because it has helped me understand the foundation of my thoughts and emotions -- for a lifelong thinker and searcher, that is food for the soul. This is a great website - thanks to everyone for their creations and
contributions to our ... change. Margaret
I am happy that others who have the courage to journal online all seem to sound so peaceful. As for myself, I feel anything but calm and thoughtful at the moment!
I finally have the chance to meet my birthfather. So much of me wants my chance to see for myself the man who fathered me. Not because I think he will be a great father figure or fill a void in my heart. I am conpletely aware he chose not to be a parent, and that's ok. I just want
to see if we look alike, have the same sense of humor, or have anything at all in common. Nope, I don't need a father.
Here's my chance to meet this mystery man.
But they tell me he's dangerous, maybe even a wanted fugitive. I have a family to protect, not to mention myself.
SO what do I do? I don't want to judge, or lose a chance I've waited for all these years. But I can't harm my family, either.
What to do? I shall pray and wait.
Do you feel like you are hanging from a thread? TRY JESUS.
I feel as though I scrubbed out most of the dirt and cobwebs that were making my heart a depressing place to be. Now that I have wiped the slate clean, it's time for me to enjoy my hard work!
Dear Ana Maria,
I too feel as if I were born in the wrong century. I to long for my knight in shining armour. Perhaps one day our knights will find us. But in the meantime, take a lesson from Guinevere--become a queen! Take this time to become wiser, stronger, more loving. Do not wait for him to
rescue you--rescue yourself. Become the woman you are meant to be and you will attract the knight worthy of your love!
Some books that I love and you may also . . . Guinevere, Queen of the Summer Country and The Knight of the Sacred Lake--both by Rosalind Miles. And one to remind you of the queen you are--A Woman's Worth by Marianne Williamson.
my thought is-- gay people arent bad
my other thought-- Buddy not all people believe in jesus and so dont try to make other people convert.
"Should you decide to share some moments of my life... enter softly and warmly. Be careful to take only that which is offerd--
and when you leave.... do so quietly and quickly...while I am pre-occupied." Logan Clarke
"Desperation gives birth--- to ludicrous optimism.." tearabar.com
" In order to have a pocket full of dreams, one must first have-- a hand filled with vision.." tearabar.com
"Your destiny on earth lies in the blank pages of an unwritten story.
Pick up the pen and accept responsibility- of the author" Last Night an Angel Stopped By....tearabar.com
"If your thoughts become carefree and you yearn for distant places to be Come seek a brand new path with me and share the summer wine....
And if along the way we find an understanding of all mankind... We'll go back home with peace of mind and dream another dream..." tearabar.com
Ah what a cold crisp day here but at least the sun is shining bright and melting some of that pretty white snow we recently got. Sure makes you thankful for warm weather. The cold air makes you see your own breath, and gives you those nice rosey red cheeks. Nancy
I used to change to be what other people thought I should be. I guess that sounds stupid... but I only wanted people to accept me, even if that meant I changed in order to be accepted.
Deep breath, brave steps forward...
SO now I choose to let my true self shine through! If people don't like parts of me, that is their opinion. It takes a lot of different people to fill up this world, and I choose to be original!
Hi there, This is really a great place to read all the stuff out there. To the one or ones that are or by now thinking of suicide please don't!!! You are special and when you are feeling down, maybe talk to a friend, or clean or go for a walk but just don't do it. Think of
all the people that will miss you. There are plenty who would. I too have depression and struggle with the lows from time to time. See your Dr. for a check-up you might need a medication change too. We have to make life worth it so this doesn't win and beat us....... Take Care, Nancy
thanks Nancy. That was encouraging. firstname.lastname@example.org
Time to let down the barriers to let your soul free... Never let negative words or feelings weigh down the carefree child who still lives deep within your heart....
Perhaps once in a hundred years a person may be ruined by excessive praise, but surely once every minute someone dies inside for lack of it
I was led to this site just today. What a special day. Tomorrow I will be back. And tonight I will invite Soul to tell me why she brought me here. RAFFY
What do you do when you meet someone wonderful but you know from the beginning your two lives could never mesh? When you are on such totally different paths and at such different places in your lives that it could never work . . . do you just pass up the opportunity to get
to know them? Or do you risk a broken heart knowing full well it couldn't work? T.
I WANT TO LIVE SPIRITUALLY, PEACEFULLY, QUIETLY, JOYFULLY, BUT YET, I STILL FUN AND EXCITEMENT IN MY LIFE. I WANT THIS FOR OTHERS AS WELL**NY
Recently I read that in order to find the love of my life, I need to stop wishing and planning. So today when the opportunity to wish came along I said a prayer instead...and asked God to give me the very best He had in store for me! I will wait and pray...I will continue to
love myself and others...I will believe that my prayer was heard and will be answered in God's perfect time! I am a writer...some don't understand, some say I need to publish my works. I am a teacher asst. with B.D. kids...some don't understand, some say I need to finish my degree so that I can
"really" teach. I have many talents, and gifts that God has Blessed me with...some don't understand, some say I need to take those talents and gifts and share them with others to bring them to Christ. Today, like everyday, I ask God to lead me to the people He wants my words to touch...that He wants
me to teach...that He wants me to bring to a relationship with Christ. Was that someone you today?
><> <>< Doni
Everything looks so dark and shallow i am so lonely,the valentines day blues is kicking in,i am all alone ,i have been forever iam young but i have never had a valentine on valentines day my thing has been those 2 3 day long things just having a good tiem i have had a couple
boys who i loved my curent boyfiend did make me feel just so special,all those onenight stands had made me think i was just good for when guys had a night away from their girlfriend.i am good looking ,really but i was really afraid of commitement and drama in relationships sometime it got to me.when
i met my curent boyfriend all this joy came into me i cant explain.welive in different sides of the world and have done it for months lots of months i think i will break up with him,the boy i love the most but having i mean "Having" him hurts me a lot because he cant be with me so i want to call it
quits now even it breaks my heart i am sure a s hell he is the love of my life but ihave to let go...Kristie 25/Ca
Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it inflames the great. - Bussy-Rabutin
What if the only "life lesson" I am here to learn is how it feels to be miserable?
It seems, at least for the moment, that I'm destined to bang my head on the wall. Though I accept that the Creator has a higher purpose for me sometimes I rail against my seeming lack of progress. I'm praying for the patience to see my progress, no matter how small it might
My thought for the day... Why is it that just when I think a burden has been lifted another load is dropped? Some days I amaze myself by the resillience that I muster and the strength that I possess. I'm thankful that Jesus said "Come to me all you who are burdened and I
will give you rest." Why? Because I sure don't find it from my work, family, even friends who seem to think that my energy and resources are never-ending. Today was one of those "do I really have to go out in the world?" days...but you know, now that it is almost over and I can look back, oh what
sweet BLESSINGS God gave to me today! I'll name a few, maybe they'll spark a glimmer for you! A cooperative ex-spouse, my 5 year old neice just calling to say,"I LOVE YOU NANA", listening to my 7 year old read, sharing the Christian message of LOVE with students at church, seeing 6 Jr. High girls in
a circle of prayer at our PUBLIC school, frost on the trees, an extra tight squeeze, and believe it or not, hearing my 12 year old say "OH, MOM!!!" WOW what a glorious day it turned out to be...and to think I would have passed it up for even one second makes me feel very selfish, very self-centered!
Thank you, Lord. ><> Doni <><
"Young love is innocent Old love is cautious Wise love is true....
But I am neither young nor old nor wise Yet I am innocent cautious and true" Bettye....tearabar.com Last Night an Angel Stopped By.....
"Procrastination....... is the pallbearer of opportunity" www.tearabar.com
"I like flat stomachs, in place of feathers when I sleep....but tonight I'll have to settle for the starched pillows that all hotel rooms have." Logan
"I the Sun.... light the darkness....and warm the cold. Each day I view the world- a world infested with hate.
I ask you.... is love really so hard ?" Logan....www.tearabar.com
"I did not find God in some hotel room, between the pages of Gideon. Nor did he come to me through the lips of men in churches, who pretend to be holier than me !" Logan.........tearabar.com
Today, I am filled with energy and working away! It feels so good to be getting things done for a change!
I sit here at my desk doing "work" that does not inspire me or compel me to rush in to work in the morning.
I long to find my purpose--my calling. I know there is something I am supposed to be doing. I pray that I find it soon, and that I have the ability to recognize my talents.
Ever hear of that saying "If you love someone/something, let it go. If it comes back it is true, if not it was never meant to be"? I am learning that it hurts to see those 'dear' things flying off into the distance, knowing full well this is the end. But it is strangely
liberating to be freed of the insanity I was so accustomed to. Why do I feel guilty for being thankful that this is finally the end of years of abuse? Just a by-product of the games that were played with my soul, my too-kind and too-trusting heart.
Good bye and farewell to those who left my life once again. Never again shall you knock on my door or call my number in an effort to rid yourself of your self-inflicted pain. Now I can live my life with out fearing the knock at the door, or the ringing of the phone. I don't have to
be ordered to carry the heavy cross that all of you have created for yourselves. I can live without all of you, as I have been blessed with a man and a child to replace all the hurt caused by you, you who could never really love me anyway. I am handing you back you selfish guilt, your manipulative
games, no longer will I allow you to scar my battered heart.
Now I am free. I feel like I have wandered out of a small, isolated building, and am now seeing the world with new eyes. Yes, it may take me some time for my eyes to adjust to the brightness and my legs to find strength to carry me. I may stumble and trip at first, and surely you
will laugh at me as I struggle. But shortly I will be leaping and skipping and enjoying life as if all those years were nothing but a passing nightmare, a forgotten memory. You will then be alone with the demons who call out your name, the demons you have created for yourself.
I stretch my arms, raise my head, and with a radiply beating heart, thank the Father who rescued me from my prison. Now it is my turn to live in the light.
Keep on writing! :) Writing is theraputic.
Hello, my name is Katishah Battle and I was just browsing threw the Soulful Living section that discussed various things in reference to soulful living. It is Quite clear that the meaning of soulful living is living a glorious life;meaning living life to it's fullest
potential getting the best that you can while maintaining. Soulful Living is a very interesting topic because it brings a variety of thoughts to my mind such as how do individuals live a soulful life and are they living right or where do Soulful Living takes place.I just think of plenty of issues
about Soulful Living because it's pretty exciting when you think about it.
I finally had the nerve to ask for some time for myself tonight. I know that this sounds like no big deal, but trust me when I say that it was HUGE! Once I had the time, what I had to do only took about half an hour...and I was so tied up in knots that I couldn't even enjoy
the extra time that I had. I struggle with where I am but more with where God wants me to be. I ask for His guidance, and hear nothing but, DON'T LET THE FIRE DIE. I ponder. The fire I feel for Jesus I will not let die...if that is the fire God meant. The fire I felt for my love is now nothing more
than an ember...I've tried to keep a tender spark there, but now realize that for a long time it wasn't him that fanned the flame, but me...one-sided love soon grows cold. And when there is glimmer it is soon doused because it was probably just me trying to believe that it was really love. New love?
It could have been, but the fire blazed too quickly and at the wrong time, and has been doused by others who don't want this love in my life. Others who are more important than anyone else to me except the Trinity. Many feel that I shouldn't let this flame fade, but I believe that in His time God
will send someone to me to fan my flame, stirring the ashes, kindling the embers, until once again a spark of real love will exist. Not love that almost fits, or that kind of works, but love that is just right for me (us). I have to believe this, because The Bible says, "ask and it shall be given to
you, if you ask in line with what your Heavenly Father wants for you." Well I know that He will eventually answer my prayer, because I know that He wants to give me what is best for me if I am just willing to accept it! For now, I will keep my heart on fire for Jesus, and look toward the cross...for
it is there that I find my HOPE, my STRENGTH, my PEACE each day.
CHURCH IS FUNNY!SCHOOL IS OK!i HAVE A DOG SHE IS COCKERSPANIEL MIXED WITH BLUE SHELTIE
The strongest evidence of love is sacrifice
I'm scared.I'm 17 ,but I haven't been dating a guy longer than two weeks,guys run away for me,why?I'm very beautiful,that's for sure,but I don't care for their looks.Then why do they let them think that I sleep with every guy I talk to and send my smiles at?In fact,I'm a
virgin.Why they think if I'm pretty,I sleep with everyone I meet.I'm smart,becuase I'm an honor student of the law department,I always have something more interesting to discuss than makeup and clothes,but guys never stay with me.They come and go.And no one believes that I'm an absolutely different
person.Yep,of course I will find someone to go to the Valentine's Party,there are tons of guys hangin' on my tail,but hey I need real love,the person who doesn't even know about my existence,who doesn't care nor for my looks ,nor for my inner world.What am I supposed to do,if he doesn't love me if
he's not attracted to me even a bit.....tears,they are in my eyes right now...I won't bear that too long,maybe I look to pretty and that's why no one wants to love me...I need help,terribly need help....
To Miss Scared 17 year old...
Be proud of who you are, no matter how much people try to drag you down. Those boys you talk about are insecure and intimidated by your success. They feel they could never rise to your level, so they try to drag you down to theirs instead. I fell victim to that myself and wasted
time losing track of WHO I AM. All because my desire to have romantic love in my life was greater than my need to stay stong until a real MAN entered my life.
Your heart is so big that you will have no problem having a love in your life. Spend this 'single' time cultivating your soul and your spirit, so when MR. ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL enters your life, you'll know exactly what you have to offer him and to your relationship. It will happen!
I think the ages of 16-20 are the TOUGHEST for a young woman, so your feelings are totally natural.
My prayers are with you - Stay strong.
I just started to journal again after many years of not keeping a journal. A met a man at a book store who is in a journal discussion group. He gave me this web site address. If I see him again I will have to thank him, this site is great. I will be a wonderful help to me in
keeping up with my journal. Thank you Ed.
It can be so tough to be an adult! Yet I still pray for contentment with what I have and with who I am. I also pray for a peaceful heart. Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute....
I don't think he will ever realize how much pain he caused me today simply because he was only thinking about his own pain. But with that pain a powerful surge of strength also followed and it's going to take alot to get me to come back.
Today is a sad day for me. I have discovered that I am not the great woman of independence but a woman who is subject to life's cruel circumstances. So I look to heaven for the answer, "Why am I here?" Perhaps tommorrow will be better.
Today I resolve to do something, anything that will make me smile.
live more than we hop butwe must know what we know
It is so cold, dark and wet outside today--but I feel warm inside.
Feel free to share your life and hopes with me, But remember to do it with honesty.
Why did you tell me that you would not give me up, then turn around and leave me exposed to the cold and loneliness of not having your friendship?
At this time, I am feeling very appreciative towards the design and colors for the Soulful Living web site.........delightful, yummy! Thanks, Susie
Today, I'm feeling as if a door has opened and given way to let a new experience take form. It's as if I'm looking into snapshots of a time to come. It feels exciting!!!!!
As I rushed into the pharmacy at walmart my hands were shaking, and my heart pounding in my throat. Up and down the aisles, searching endlessly. Little beads of sweat are starting to form on my forehead and the back of my neck. Finally I see it locked in a acrylic box with a
sign which reads 2weeks supply for only forty - five dollars and ninty six cents. Instantly Lighted banners begin flashing subliminal messages in my brain : That's way too much to spend what if it doesn't work, what then . You still have a carton at home wait till you finish them. Standing in front
of the acrylic box I'm mesmerized, yes - no - maybe . I walked around to the next aisle and look at the vitamins.Then tell myself lou you got to stop it's time dear God it's pass time. A tiny voice gently speaks: You can't continue this lifestyle and it not catch up to you. Listen to me you love
sonny,and he lying in a hospital bed wondering if this is the time they will say it's CA. He has got to quit and so do you. Before he comes home right now. With each word from the gentle voice another light burned out in the flashing banner. I went to the counter and requested a box the 2week supply
for only forty - five dollars and ninty - six cents . The cashier asked are you okay. I could hear myself say yes as my eyes stayed fixated on that darn acrylic box. I will be better soon. I watch every move in slow motion unlocking the acrylic box taking the box of nicotine patches over to the
counter. Starting to ring them up just as that calming sigh is about to happen. Some stupid dump woman asked where could she find some udder cream for cracked dry hands. I begin to tremble with fear and tears are beginning to form in my eyes. Dear God lady who gives a hoot about your hands. If I
don't get these patches on I will screem. The cashier looks at me and see the desperation and finishes ringing me up. My dry shaky voice said thank you, but could I please put one on now . The cigarette diary
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our Light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?Actually, who are you not to be? You
are a child of God. Your playing small does not save the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.We were born to make manifest the Glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own
Light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
Nelson Mandela Inauguration speech 1994
Keeping our place through our journals opens new avenues of personal growth. Looking back through my writings, I find I have predicted and fulfilled many of the things I've written. I look forward to discovering what treasures I'll uncover in the upcoming days, weeks,
months, and years ahead. **Deborah**
It has been awhile since I wrote here I am Diariest. I have missed all of you . Check out my Diary Club http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/diariestpages
Just One Kiss... Just one kiss will make you fall in love But take your time and do it right 'cause we are two doves Peace, ONE LOVE By: CandyApple Divine1803@aol.com to read more of my poetry
A man who is genuine real...Understanding, loving, and knows what I need...who stands tall and strong...thur hard times and good...whether I was wrong or right...his there...who has a mind control not his pants...who treats me with respect like a beauty queen...not even raising his
hand to hurt me...who helps take the pains away...my falling tears he catches...my broken heart he heals...his always is by my side...his affectionate...his charming...his my mentor...my friend...my best friend...my lover...my love...my soulmate...my hero...my prince...my king...his is my BlackDove.
So alone Trapped inside a youthful body with a mind that wanders...here and there... So alone Trapped inside a past, and present that few care to understand So alone Trapped in despair of what the future will bring in the next minute...hour...day...year So alone Trapped by
my own ignorance of what you are going through So alone Trapped by my feelings of wanting to be there for you So alone Trapped within the confines of my time and the needs of those I love So alone Trapped in reality that you don't understand I do what I can do today and then go on my way I hope that
someday, someone will do for me what I have done for you if I find myself So alone Trapped
I love to write. I would love to be a published writer, but I can't seem to finish any of my writings. I start something and don't know how to continue it. I get stuck. I hate when that happens, and it happens all the time. How I wish I could write. I love the feeling of
tapping on the computers and words on the screen. I love writing on my journal and the feel of the pen gliding on the paper. But my words are meaningless. I have nothing to tell. I have nothing of interest. How do writers do it? I find it so difficult and yet I yearn to write. Sometimes I feel I can
write forever or until my hands get tired. I don't care what I put on paper so long as I'm writing. I feel the same way when I eat chocolate or when I dance or when I listen to music. Words just can't describe it. Authors out there, would you give me some advice. How do I finish my writing? How do I
make it interesting? What do people want to know about anyway? Authors out dare, please won't you help me? What should I do? How should I continue my writing? I'm stuck.
I feel as if reading by your entry, you had read my mind. I write daily also and often wish I were published, or had something beautiful, meaningful and deep to say. I believe that writing for writing sake may be enough. If we are driven to write just for enjoyment of the craft,
that may be all we can ask for. Perhaps, with enough practice--and observation of life, we will one day become recognized for our talents. For now, isn't it enough just to record the "meaningless" thoughts we have? What do we need to prove that our words are enough? Money, fame? Hey--most great
artists aren't even acknowledged until they're dead! Keep writing--your stories will come. Everyone has a story to tell. Everyone!
If anything, writing has given me the gift of experiencing every moment--I make the effort to go out there and live my own stories, find my own voice. Sometimes that's not easy. All I really want to do is light the candles, turn on the music, read and write. But I know that the
best authors venture out and live "juicy". Let's not hide ourselves away searching too much for the "deep" insights--let's just take that journal with us--everywhere!
P.S. to "Stuck"
It's interesting that you wrote "authors out 'dare', won't you help me?"
From Diariest To Other Writers
I live in Ohio and it seems so hard to find other writers I need inspiration It seems so hard to sit down and relax and do some writing that is something I love to you .I have left messages on the message board but I can never find other writers Where are you diariest/writers if
you are out there email me : email@example.com or check out my web site :http://writerscloset.homestead.com ~*~*~*~*~*~*I need inspiration~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~
Well, I am engaged to a man who will be leaving me soon. I cried all day today I dont understand Why do I have to suffer I have been thru this to many time I am tired I dont think I will find another man like him I LOVE YOU, Fresh
Poor, poor sister. She thinks I gave up on her. Not true. Just doing what she asked me to do. Backing off. She thinks I get too deep. SO I tiptoed away. Did her problems tiptoe away with me? Maybe, maybe not... But she is still blaming me. So I continue to tiptoe. I will
tiptoe until I hear her true voice. For the one I hear is muddled with pain and confusion. I can't be near till her voice has been cleansed Of the pain she holds so dear to her soul. Dragging her down, down, down.
I tried to help her up! But alas, I lost my footing. I slipped and we fell. Down, down, down.
I think she hates me because I lost my footing.
She has the strength of a thousand men She will find her footing. So I did not leave her to abandon her.
I have to find my own way, and she has to find hers. We need to carry our own burdens. Not rest our weight on each other. That is not the purpose of reunion.
Two women standing tall, scanning the horizons.
Are we walking apart or together?
I can't tell - my eyes are straight forward. But perhaps someday she will be in my feild of vision again.
Tall and strong.
Things happen for a reason.
WHy can't we accept that and move on?
We always try to change what He has planned.
Then we weep at the pain we created for ourselves.
I don't think it is meant to be.
I think you know it to.
Silence is an answer.
why why why me?
She was here...Or is she gone...Life is nothing to live for...should she go...her heart pours out with tears of hurt...Is it pain...she suffers...how is she going to make it...she griefs over her lost soul...what is she going to do...Live to see another day.
Secret lover...hush, don't say a word...you'll blow my undercover...listen, they heard...
Look, I got to go now...I think they are looking for me...huh, take this towel...go, and be free...
I'm upstairs...in the bedroom...no, i am not having a fair...baby, why you here so soon...
Show me what...who is that...<man, I am going to kick his butt>...Oh, so your Pat...
Husband, why is he in our house...I didn't let him in...well, go and get the hell out...Honey, we need to get an alarm system again...
I love you, too, boo.
my thoughts of the day: realizing that i have not spent my time in the most productive or empowering way has been a wake up call for me to begin to live my life in a more soulful and loving way instead of wasting it in idleness. although i have some regrets i wont dwell on
them and i can move on from here to being the best that i can be ...
secrets can ruin innocence... live for the truth...
I am reclaiming myself today......Whatever paths, whatever journey I encounter from this day forth will be because I have chosen it and not because someone has forced or has chosen a particular flow for me.
i just started my new job as a debt collector.
.um ponto final para comecar um texto que de tao longo me tomaria todo o espaco de um dia. estou me sentindo cansada ate para pensar e a vida passou a ter uma cor de realidader que as vezes faz arder meus olhos e eu choro diante de tanto desalento e desesperanca.
sinceramente gostaria de sentir-me melhor e ser capaz de deslizar meus dedos pelo teclado em palavras belas e encorajadoras daquelas que levantam o animo de quem ler.felizmente que sou tambem covarde e nao me arrisco a escrever em ingles quebrado os cacos dos meus sentimentos confusos quanto a esse
dia nublado nesse momento da vida. devo no entanto, mesmo em meio a tanta amargura dizer que acredito em Deus e sei que cedo ou tarde "algo" dentro ou fora de mim precisara acontecer para que eu possa como ser humano e como mulher mostrar que sou capaz de overcome as limitacoes que o medo me
impoe.sorry pelos rasgos na gramatica, meu PC nao comunga comigo e de repente que diferenca faria acertar se ninguem pode me entender?a todos eu desejo um dia bom, uma semana melhor ainda e uma vida cheia de coragem, saude e amor.
What a empowering site. Not everything is "happy" but that is ok because that is what life is all about. We are able to reach to others with our words and that is how we learn and grow. My life has been up and down for 31 years now and alot of it wasn't "happy" and I've been
very self destructive to my being. By the grace of God I'm now in recovery and life has taken on a new peaceful meaning. From someone who was slowly but surely killing herself, I now have learned that there is hope and the rest of my life has beautiful things in store for me..THERE IS HOPE!!!
To Kristen The woman who wins may have been counted out several time, but she didn't hear the referee. good luck
We can't always show to someone what we already know. They unfortunatly have to go through each little hell on their own. I read that in a poetry book over fifteen years ago and it has always stuck with me. I've been through the experience myself many times and I find it to
be true. Many times people would try to warn me of situations that could be very damaging to myself and I always thought that it wouldn't happen to me. Well, I learned the hard way that they were right, but then again I feel as if I was meant to go through what I went through in order to get to
where I am today. Even though I wish I could of avoided all of the pain and self destruction, I'm thankful to have made it out alive and to have a deeper understanding of who I am. I now hold the knowledge of my own "little hell" and know it's nothing I want to go back to. I will say that it would
of been easier to have taken anothers word on it, so don't ever think it couldn't happen to you, it just might. And hopefully you can come out of it alive and be able to share with others like I have. God Bless.....Kristen
I visited my mother in the hospital this evening... Her body is dying, but her mind seemed so alert... what a terribly sad state to be in... Mom, I love you so much! I take your love with me in my heart... and I leave my love here in yours... Good night.
I am feeling very good today. It is raining and I am home looking out the window feeling very luck. I know its temporary and I will have up and downs. My life journey is still exciting I am welcoming change in my job and looking forward to find a relationship that will allow
me growth but still allow love. I am high on Saturday. God Bless All.
my thoughts for the day... im happy that i have made progress in writing online and have been having good dreams lately. life is full of possibilities and although i have made a few recent mistakes im learning from them and i know that everything happens for a reason both
good and bad things because we have lessons to learn. then u learn from your mistakes and move on to the next thing in life.
Sunshine breaking through the clouds Icy pools reflect promise Bare trees before long Will provide shade from Sunshine breaking through the clouds These cycles in nature remind me that For everything there is a time (ECCL) but how does this relate to me? To the season of my
life? My love? Each time I see the "Son" Breaking through the "clouds" Of my life, reflecting "LOVE" from the icy pools of my heart I wonder if I can stretch my "Bare arms" to encircle you to shade you from the heat that life brings to you right now And I realize that you have to find your own shade
you have to want the reflection of Him in your life you have to meet the Son as He breaks through the clouds of your life just as I do I can't see Him, feel Him, welcome Him, For you... And until then, will I wait? Will I move on? Will I find peace in the everyday? And night? I lift my bare arms in
prayer and praise. I look for the truth that I can hold onto. I hang a swing from the bare branches and in the interim I play I let the wounded little girl surface and invite her to meet Him, To heal, to feel, to laugh, to cry. I wait... And I'm thankful today for the sun breaking through the
Feb. 25, 2001
Why is it so hard to break up with someone who really love you and that doesn't want to break up?
Life stinks and there are no solutions to the troubles abound. Thoughtfully, Rachelle
Even though it's cold with freezing rain, I'm at work for 5+ more hours, I have to take a bus home tonight, I still have found today to be a beautiful day. My "husband" and I had a loving, good weekend together, eating chinese, watching movies, reconecting with one
another... These are the little things in life I cherish today. I'm grateful to be alive, I'm thankful to be me today. There were many years wasted while thinking during that time that I wouldn't ever be content or happy with my life. Not every day is roses, but, they're not full of thorns either.
We all have the power to change things around for ourselves. It's not always easy but very well worth it. Kristen
I have many thoughts... more so of the things I have learned in my 35 years. I have never considered much until recently. This month my world came crashing down. The man who I have been married to was sentenced to prison. How crushed, how tragic, how sickening 15 years of
marriage ended up to be. Although it is only a short term of two years, it is still a long time where two people have never been apart. The reality of having everything to having not even a pot to call your own, the prospect of anger and divorce have crossed my mind. What can not be denied is that
love matters, and no matter what has happened, the forgiveness is compelling. These short days of his absence is hard to bear, but I know that I can get through the lonliness and sadness. I know he will come back better. My thoughts are... that love can conqure all. The stength to get through these
times rely on the power of love. Is there anyone out there who knows this pain? Share yours thoughts with me. angellstar
Angellstar, please know that love does conquer all and that all things happen for a reason. If you two share an amazing and true love, then stick by his side and be his angel. The next 2 years will be hard, but you both will come out stronger. Allow the love and forgiveness
to grow. God bless you both. -nevaeh
Evil is the absence of EMPATHY. Never forget the pain others feel. Break this cycle of hatred and let's replace the hate with understanding. Learn to love yourself so you can also love others.
I thank GOD that I can call my mother today and let her know of all the positive things in my life ,instead of hiding the ugly truth of the way I used to live. My mother has surprised me with her acts of unconditional love, accepting who I was and feeling relief and joy
about how my life is turning for the best now since being in recovery. For a while there, I felt that she had given up on me. I know now that she was always there for me hoping and praying I would be able to live the life she always wanted for me...a good life without heroin. I thankful for her
support and I'm thankful to be free today. Kristen
May God bless the souls of people who mean others harm.
23 years later and I'm still here! Guess I'm tougher than I thought!
Ready to fulfill my divine plan - open mind, open soul, open heart. The lessons I've learned will act as a filter, guarding my conscience. Eyes forward to the future!
To my hubby: Hand in hand, joined together. We can conquere it all together! How lucky we are to have each other. :)
Today I decided that you are not to make me feel bad because of your problems. I realized that alot of times people are so full of their own problems and thoughts that sometimes their response to an innocent remark or a gesture is taken wrong.It's not that the person has
spoken in an ill manner or has been disrespectful of emotion but rather that some people's spirits are in such conflict or sorrow that they take everything as an insult. I will continue to treat others fairly, respectfully and with empathy and other than that all I can say is "C'est la vie"!
I am so proud to be a woman!!!!!!!!!
It never ceases to amaze me this thing called the WOMAN'S SOUL Who can undergo the most tragic of events and still continue to carry out her life and nurture those who live around her.
Some people tend to use the TRUTH as a club... and then proceed to beat other people to death with it. Then they sit on their almighty tush and say "I'm not wrong, cause it is the TRUTH".
I'm not going to fight any more. I tiptoed away because it is quite obvious that who I am is not good enough for you.
You've got your wish. I got off that plane, and stayed for a while. But now I look back, wave, and am getting back on that plane to a new home, in a new city, and plan on enjoying a fresh start.
Enjoy your life the way you wanted it all along: Without ME, once again. If we run into each other in the future, maybe my presence won't make you cringe or cry anymore.
Whether you want me to or not, I have and will love you... but I guess it will just be from afar. Your wish has been granted, now I quietly say Goodbye.
I wonder what it is like to wake up in the morning and enjoy my day the way I choose to... without wondering if what I do will be acceptable to others, or will I only end up hurting feelings again?
For the first time in my life I will greet the morning and eagerly set out to be who I CHOOSE TO BE!
Step aside, cause I'm running through! :)
It's strange how we can turn mountains out of mole hills. My husband lives in another city about an hour away for right now and I had a very hard time getting a hold of him via telephone. Every time I phoned him I would get more and more anxious to speak with him and then my
mind would start wandering about what could be wrong and why hasn't he called me. My old insecurities came up and I started to feel as if he didn't care to speak with me. Well, today I finally reached him only to find out that he's been trying to call me as well all week and because of our schedules
we kept missing each other. Why did I get myself worked up for nothing? Why do we jump the gun and start to feel as if something bad is happening? It's easy to do to ourselves at times though because for me I was always looking for the negative aspects of life for so long. I'm learning that I am a
person of love and respect these days and this situation has helped me look at myself once again. If I keep up with a possitive attitude about life and it's situations today I will be able to trust that everything is ok and I don't need to worry unnecessarily anymore. Kristen
I like being able to do things that I love again. For years the only important things in my life were totally self destructive and killing my spirit. Not knowing who you are and being controlled by a powerful substance is absolutly terrible to say the least. I like to read
my tarot cards again, I have money again, I have self worth again, I'm learning who I am and remembering my talents, and i'm learning to love freely because I'm learning to love me again. Life can be up and down but I'm thankful for a second chance to make it work again. Kristen
I feel so desperately sad tonight. I worry that this wound I carry will always be a part of me. I worry that my pain will always be as sharp. I am terrified that I will not have the strength to go on - that these moments are the final lines of my verse.
Please know that time heals all wounds... And know that I speak from experience.
I can't change the past but I can shape the future. Quietly I ponder all I have to offer.
Why must I have it all? Why can't I let go of the past- an exhusband who I didn't want who has married again and yet I push into his life to be first-to be more than his wife now. I have a wonderful husband and I don't want the ex back- but I have to be the most important
one. Why am I so selfish
It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, An hour to like someone and, A day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone.
Today is a new day, filled with unendless possibilities. Today I face a dragon and I conquer my fear with a real solution. Today is good day. I feel lifted up..... Tomorrow I do not know about. But, I know who holds tomorrow and because Jesus lives eternal, then I can face
Ephesians 3:20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, May God bless and keep you
Sometimes I feel like I am only absorbing information and fine-tuning my skills in preparation for times ahead.
I love to write, and slowly am improving.
I want to learn so I can help others.
I'm warming up to become
What I am Meant to Be.
It's 1:52 A.M. and I just can't sleep. I'm struggling with the "Why's". Why does God allow bad things to happen to good people? I know God gave us all free will, and it is not God DOING the bad, but why, oh why, oh why!!!!!!!!!!! A friend lost a child yesterday - another
lost a wife. I know I should be concentrating on Faith, and it is so important for me to stay close to God - but I'm so angry with Him today. Can I say that, will I be punished? I love my God, but I'm so sad and confused.
Help me to be patient so I can help him get better. It's something he has to do all by himself, even though his actions affect the whole household.
What is it about the bonds of matrimony that keep us bound even after the marriage ends? Is this a sign that we should still be together or that we just haven't let go and moved on? Sometimes I think that all I want is that...a fresh start, a new relationship, definitely
with someone who loves and appreciates me. Yet, there is forever before me the power of you to turn my world upside down, to take my life and spin it around. Friends say, "We can't be taken advantage of unless we allow it..." I know that I need to better stand up for myself with you, against you,
from you...but ingrained deep in my subconscious and etched across my heart is a submissive tendency that emerges with you. Am I weak? I think not. Is it fear? Sometimes. But more it is respect, compassion (not co-dependence), LOVE that makes or allows me to give to you. But still the question
remains,"HOW DO I MOVE ON?" Will I ever reach the point in my life when someone else will mean as much as the illusion of what we could have had? I want a real relationship, not a fairy tale where there is no pain, are no problems..I know that doesn't exist. Rather, I would prefer ups and downs
shared together. Hills and valleys seen side by side. For now I am content to be alive, and free, and know that if it be God's will someone is out there waiting for me.
><> Doni <><
rain rain go away
The drinkner, someone who seems to have things undercontrol, yet burdened with a little voice that says, "This has to stop". The struggle is one seen however the monkey has more control. The concept of loosing everything does not bother nor does the potential pain brought
upon those left in the after math. Then there is regret and haunting of the past to torching every day in lock up. The drinker might knows his wrong doing and may pray for a change, but it seems there is always a price to it. That price is the tears and loss shed by a marital partner, the death of
an innocent, and angry victims who feel distruction of one family is payment for the death of thier loved one. And if the drinker is lucky maybe there would be no accident, the price to be paid is the abuse to those loved. This mystery astounds me. Shatters my faith with the question of "why me?". I
am angry, royally pissed off because I am a victum too. I have no voice in the legal system because of who I am married to. No one cares about this person who is made homeless, impoverished, and without transportation. Who has to live off welfare because the jobs applied for are letters that say, "
thank you but no thank you we have found someone who more meets our needs." Like lets get judgemental and accuse that personell agent of selecting someone who just might be the daughter, wife or lover of the police chief. Life sucks, no matter how often you play by the rules. When your married to a
drinker.... you will always loose. it that so much damage has to happen before the drinking stops. I realize that it is a disease and those involved know the insanity but
When Dad died...Oct.9,2001...he peeled back the curtain that veils this life from the other side..very tentative at first. I held his hand. He saw a boy that I could not see.The boy made him smile, as he had seen the boy before, on the ride to the hospital, in ER, and now in
his room. He raised his hand as if to beckon to something which I could not see. Then he saw a sparrow..Whatever he saw next must have been truly glorious, for he had no words to describe it to me...he truly glowed and peacefully passed on, through, over? Leaving me in complete awe...at this man, at
this life...Later I would feel the aches in my heart as faced the pain of a daughter losing her father. But for that moment I felt utter amazement and wonder! Wow! Ginny
another day is over and I have the whole weekend to be lonely and dwell on how she has hurt me and ignored me....yet AGAIN!!!!...and after all I have done for her, and all of the blood sweat and tears (literally) I have lost because of her and for her and it hurts knowing
that she would never do for me what I do/have done for her....but I don't understand why? well I guess I do in a way....we are all different...we all do different things for different reasons....but still....I wish I could find somebody like me that wouldn't leave me hanging. I know I would never
leave her hanging. I've given up plans among other things to help her....sorry if this sounds like a big pity kick, but I am deeply hurt....its been going on for so long, and its getting to the point where its my focus, which isn't healthy....theres got to be a middle ground somewhere...there is a
solution waiting for me to act on it, once I find it...this isn't meant to end bitterly...or at all maybe...theres just a switch somewhere buried deep, and I have to shut it off...or turn it on...
There is a season for everything in life... sometimes when a season changes we are sad, other times we are more than ready for the change. No matter what season tends to be our FAVORITE, all the seasons and the changes are necessary to complete a healthy cycle of life.
The snow is melting, birds are beginning to sing.. time for a complete spring cleaning. Shake out the dusty rugs, sweep out the dirt and cobwebs, shine the dingy windows. Take in the sun and fresh air and rejoice at the new life being created all around.
It's good to feel the new life beginning to bud and take root in my soul. I ask the LORD to instruct me in how to nuture that life in order to grow into a strong, healthy shoot of HIS life. He is the faithful gardener, working in my heart.
Spring, oh Spring... my most favorite time of the year! You've arrived just in time! I am ever so grateful!
I don't know what's wrong with me. I am so tired. I'm taking vitamins and my medication since I found out that I have a thyroid condition, but I'm still very tired. I hate this feeling. I used to exercise, but now I can't seem to get myself to start again. I really hate this
feeling. I wonder what I can take for this tired feeling. Vitamins aren't helping. Can someone out there suggest something? I would really be forever grateful. Well, I must go now, I'm at work and must get back to just that - work. Bye for now.
Why am I so tired? A few months ago, I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism. The doctor said this was probably why I was so tired. I've been taking Synthroid for my thyroid condition for a few months now, but I still feel very tired. I used to be able to exercise with no
problem, but now I can't get the energy to start. What can be causing my tireness? Can anybody suggest something? I have tried multivitamins, but they don't seem to help.
" . . ." MzT
I've been very tired too lately. I just woke up from a 6 hour nap which is getting to be habit for me...it never was before about 2 months ago....I know I don't eat right and I am under stress, so I think thats why I'm tired....maybe you too? It could be the change of
weather too I guess...hope you figure it out!
Could anyone suggest what to do for panic attacks? I have them daily, and it is starting to affect my everyday life. I am generally a happy person and I love life and I love God, but I cannot control these attacks. I am procrastinating with going to a doctor. I didn't want
it to come to that. I would also prefer not to get on any medication, but if it is necessary I will do it. Someone please help if they have been through this before. Thanks.
Extreme grief. That is the only way I can describe how I am feeling. I feel like everything that happened in my life (besides my spouse and baby) has been a joke. The void that is left behind (the aching, hurting, black hole that it is) will never be filled with anything,
but that is OK. Right now I feel like dumping all of my pain, tears, rage, confusion and insecurity down that void, having a good, cleansing cry, and then walking away from that void, on with my healing process and finding joy in the rest of my life. It's like my whole *family* (if you could call
them that) just died; the loss hurts at first, but the healing takes over, and life goes on joyfully. I will conquer this; I will be strong. Don't mind me while I grieve for the many losses I have suffered from for my entire lifetime.
I'm so glad my friend, Cindy, is back!
The sun is shining and my heart is soaring!
To the person having the panick attacks. I've also had panick attacks for years. They would come and go. I finally decided to see a therapist. I stated using some herbs, but it didn't help me much. My therapist than sent me to a psychiatrist so that he could prescribe Prozac
since she she wasn't allowed to. I didn't use it for very long because I didn't like the way it made me feel. I stated back with the herbs (I can't remember the name off hand - something wort). I started feeling better for a couple of years, but than the attacks returned after I got a new job. I
went back to my therapist and this time with my physician I got on Paxil. This has been working very well for me. I don't have any side affects, and I no longer have the panic attacks. I don't have to tell you what a relief that is. Like you, at first I was afraid to try medication, but I was so
desperate that I gave it a try. I'm glad I did. Maybe you should speak to your physician about Paxil, and I wouldn't hurt to see a therapist. I really enjoy my sessions with my therapist. I see her once a week. Talking about it to someone who understands and doesn't criticize is very helpful. Good
luck and remember, "this too shall pass". :)
To the person who responded to my need for advice on panic attacks....Thank you so much. I feel like I have been getting signs to just get over my pride and go to a doctor. But hearing people like you helps to give me that extra push that I need. You may have been taking St.
John's Wort and I have thought of taking such herbs as that, but I wasn't sure if it would do me any good. I am going to make an appt. with my doctor to see what can be done. I will mention Paxil to him. And talking with people who understand this problem and have had it themselves makes me realize
that this is just another obstacle in life that I will need to overcome. I do have faith that this too shall pass:) Thanks again for your advice. I really do appreciate it.
FOREVER some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some people move our souls to dance. They awaken us to new understanding with the passing whisper of their wisdom and make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon. Some people stay in our lives awhile, leave footprints on
our hearts and we are never, ever the same. I will always love you Henk, Gloria
Relations have been strained between my adult daughter and I for almost a year. Her boyfriend has sexually harassed me and she has chosen to disbelieve me. Now she's going to marry him. I can't support the marriage and be true to myself. She's so disappointed in me and my
heart bleeds for her...
I feel sort of unsettled and frustrated today and it scares me. My 7 years of heroin addiction was my worst nightmare come true. I'm thankful that I've been clean for 6 months now and I can see how my life is SO much better already. I worked very hard to get me back again
and that is why I don't like how I'm feeling today. Yes, I know that not every day will be great and I accept that but I guess that feeling my insecurities play with my mind today took me off balance. I'm working now(well, I should be actually working but...)I needed to stop and let out some of my
thoughts so they wouldn't consume me. A good cry will be nice when I get home tonight...I think I need it. I don't want to use and I'm aware that it would get me nowhere fast again. I just needed to share and tomorrow I'll go to a meeting. -K
Keep up the good work ,K! You can do it - even on those unbearable days. :)
When I was a child, I was preoccupied with "forever." I believed that for something to have meaning, it had to be permanent. The idea that people grow apart or lose touch was terribly depressing. Now I've realized, though, that the duration of a relationship does not reflect
its quality. There are some people who come into our lives for a brief moment, share an important lesson, and then depart. Because someone doesn't stay by your side forever does not mean that what they've taught you is without meaning.
Finally facing my demons - and finally realizing I am ME, not just another statistic. I never was alone as a child of God, no matter what happened in my life! I have a message, and I will spread it. Humans are imperfect... if a person doesn't live up to our expectations,
that doesn't mean we toss them away. Don't give up on family when things get too tough. Accept even if you don't approve. Life is short, live well.
K, hang in there! I don't know personally what it is like to have a drug addiction, but my boyfriend of 6 yrs passed away to a cocaine overdose about 2 yrs ago. He gave up on himself and chose not to fight the battle. I love to hear that others are fighting this battle
instead of giving up. I know how hard it is, but you CAN do it. Keep going to meetings and make sure you have a good support group. You will overcome this. You will have your good and your bad days, but keep in mind that this is expected. Cry a good cry if it is needed. I will say a prayer for you.
God will give you strength to make it through this. I wish you the best and remember to stay strong. You can do anything you set your mind and heart to.
Thank you to the people who offered support by writing in the journal. It was most appreciated and allowed me to realize even more that I am not alone. I'm feeling more balanced now and I thank GOD for helping me through. It's on the rough days that you need to hold on even
more and not to forget where you came from so you don't retreat back to the misery and the pain of addiction. I had what I call a "test" today. A close friend that had a relapse about a month ago works for the same company I do, along with a male we both know who she had relapsed with. She always
checks in with me before leaving work to say hi but today the guy stopped by instead. He told me he was not doing well again and is using fairly regularly. He told me that he was leaving with my female friend and asked me if I could 'hook' him up with some heroin so they could avoid being in a
"risky" situation to get what they needed. I was in awe that he could ask me that knowing I am clean and working hard to stay that way! Misery really does love company but I've been in the company of misery for years and I don't want to go back to it. I told him that I would have nothing to do with
that situation and that if he didn't want to take a risk then don't do it at all. He said he would find it himself and then my female came near my desk and simply said "I'll call ya". All I could say to her was be careful. It's such a shame, she's a good woman who is NOT fighting this disease and it
could so easily kill her. I was meant to experience this today,so I could show myself I have strength within myself and to again see how horrible this disease honestly is. I am concerned for their safety but I'm thankful that it is not me today and it doesn't have to be either. God bless them on
their self destruction....again. I'm thankful to be me today and to be free. -K
K, your strength brings tears to my eyes. What you did today was a wonderful thing. You proved to yourself that you do have the strength and will power to stay clean forever. It is so much harder when there are others around you who are on that path to self destruction, but
you must not let them win and lead you back into that way of life. You may have temptations, but you must not give in to them. This will get easier, I promise you. Maybe your friends will see how happy and free your life is and one day choose to take that same road in life. You will be a good
example to many. You are doing such a great thing. Let others see your strength and your determination. You will not only make a differenc in your life, but in the lives of many. And you will have these "tests" in life, but you will pass them. God never gives you more than you can handle. He always
gives you the strength to endure (1 Cor 10:13). I believe that all things happen for a reason. We are all fighting our own battles, but what matters is the way we handle them. I once read something by Plato that said "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle." We all have trials
and tribulations to experience, but we can get through them. Please know that you are not alone in your battle and that many other people are praying for you. Stay strong...you can do it! I don't even know you, and I have faith in you. God bless you always.
Its been a long winter, here in the corner of New England where I live, and the snow is just beginning to melt. All winter I've been struggling with writer's block--which feels very much like a blanket of cold heavy snow. But now as the snow melts I can feel the block
lifting. I've written two poems recently; that alone is reason to celebrate. One poem feels like a good one, the other is as yet unformed. I love them both, good or bad, because they tell me my inner being is ready to emerge, newer and stronger. My inner winter is on its way out. --Bonnie Smith
Try living in the moment. You can not change the past and the future is but a breath away.
I just had a friend loose her son today. He committed suicide. I just wanted to write and tell everyone that when someone tells you their problems,no matter how silly they seem; please don't tell them how fortunate they are or how blessed they are and give them examples of
how worst off they could be. Sometimes even when we know these things to be true, the actual reality of what we are going through is just as important as those who are less fortunate.
when i forget to say thankyou then my depression begins to rage again. I am so grateful for days which aren't black. Daphne
Had a good weekend with my husband again. Never imagined we could laugh like children together like when we first got together a few years back. He struggles with the same addiction that I do and we chose to get our recovery in two different cities an hour away from each
other. We are both doing the right things to be clean and get our lives together again. My recovery is mine,and his is his. We want a healthy,long life together and we feel this is the best foundation we can build for our future. I am thankful to be drug free and also very thankful that God keeps
our love together in his care. I could not ask for more right now. Everything is right where it should be and that makes me smile. -K
It feels like I've spent a lifetime fighting anxiety and depression. And today was a good day and I should be grateful but I KNOW that I will fall again, maybe tomorrow, and the pain and and sadness that accompany that fall will be overwhelming. Each time I think, can I do
this again? I fell last Wednesday, and found myself being afraid of what I was capable. I am so scared.
I guess I have always been spoiled and never even knew it. Until I meet Randy. A very kind and caring man. Described to me as the nicest guy they ever know. By many people. My dad always gave me the car and the gas card and would say bring it home full. My mom would always
go visiting with a bag of food. Most of the men in my life gave and never said a word about paying them back. They seemed to want to give to me and my kids. Was I taking them for granted? I always thought that was the way it was. That some how I was giving too, not just taking. With Randy it is how
are you going to pay me back. It makes me feel guilty like I can't keep up with all his giving. Like I am not giving. Just taking....I try to talk to him about it but it just seems to come out all wrong. Like I am complaining.
It's been a while since I have wrote But I have been thinking abou this journal and I choose to write in it. As fas as my life it is okay But I find out of all the hard work that must be done we must fine the time to be who we were born to be TRUE TO OURSELVES
I just spoke to my mother on the phone and what a good conversation we had. I'm sure it must be so nice for her to talk with me and I always say "things are going well for me, I can't complain". I asked her tonight if she ever worries that sometime when she asks me how I am
that I tell her that "nothing is right". She said yes, I was so used to you always in pain and misreable while you were using drugs that I get scared sometimes about you going back if you feel you can't handle things. I totally understand what she is saying. She worried about me so much, always
fearing the phone call that I was dead. I told my Mom tonight that no matter what comes my way, I will be able to handle it since I have God on my side again. I need to keep my attitude positive since it will bring positive results. I'm thankful that the most important thing I asked my Mom all my
years of using was "to please don't give up on me" and she never did and still hasn't. I am truly blessed in more ways than one and I thank God for this. -K
I want to profess my love to a man in Connetticut. I love you with all my heart and soul and will never forget you in all I do.
Do you even know who I am? Or do you only miss what you lost? I may have been thrown around, kicked and left behind in the past, but I will NOT allow that to happen to me again. Can't anyone make an honest commitment? Or are we all too scared of losing? In my opinion, we
have already lost.
Today I used the greeting "Namaste" for the very first time. I used in a correspondance. And I had an immediate reaction. Without any warning, as soon as I typed out the greeting, my eyes welled up and I felt overwhelmed. Something in me felt affirmed by my use of this
greeting. It may be the first time that I acknowledged the divine in me, and that was cause for tears. Good tears...Anna
My soul has been replenished by discovering the power that my ancestors hold in my life. Their presence has been like a healing balm soothing me through traumas, through sadness, through longing. They surround me like a fortress, wrestling the demons of fear that surround me
as I accept the mundane aspects of everyday existence. My ancestors will not let my soul rest until I speak their truth which gave birth to the truth I now stand in. My Grandmothers Clara and Indie are my warrior women, my daughters of the dust, my connection to that ancient way that will never
cease to exist in my subconscious and conscious mind. I love them as I love me as I love God and the divine. My soul story is their story of triumph and surrender, freedom captured at fleeting moments where the impossible becomes the probable and everything changes as I see myself as a star, as the
universe, as the infinite incarnation resonating from the crystals and the trees. My soul sits back and wonders how my mothers and fathers got over and I am annointed by the oil of their devotion to heal the nation. I love my African self and have rightfully taken my place as a descendant of those
first mothers who gave birth to life itself. I am, Judy Willis/granddaughter of Indie/Clara/Richard/John
"When I was 3, I thought the world revolved around me...I was wrong"-U2 Life is what you make it... Time may change me, but, I can't change time... Love yourself no matter what, we are ALL deserving of love and the joys life has to offer. -K
The meditation/soul stuff is beginning to worry me. I just watched movie video about New Age gods and it said all this type of stuff was involved with Buddism and Satinism. I am a christian and I was really starting to enjoy these type of books and now I hear they only open
a person up for possesion etc. Is this true anybody? I am about ready to stop reading everything, but the Bible. liprus012000200161@yahoomail
liprus, there is nothing wrong with the meditation/soul searching or book reading. I think it opens your mind up instead of closing it. I read the Bible, but I also read a lot of books about spirituality and it has changed me for the better. This has nothing to do with
Satan. We were all given a soul and we need to be aware of that. God loves you and will not turn his back on you by reading and enjoying those kind of books. I think it is a wonderful thing. Please do not let anyone make you feel uncomfortable about it. Keep the Bible a big part of your life, but
also do some soul searching and meditation. This can make you more aware of the beauty in life. I believe you will get to know yourself better and you will be more inclined to help others.
I "love" a man that can never be all mine. This is silly I am a strong Women able to manage a large staff of high level official daily but I can seem to take care of myself.
I am hiding behind a man that can never be mine the person I really am. Until I am able to be that person, I will never be turly happy in any relationship with a man.
Can't do it, I have to much to lose - job, family, kids. Maybe when I come back in my next life I will come back as a man so I can love the woman of my dreams. To be in love with some and can never tell them or show it. Any that some dam S----. I am really a mess!
I thought today was going to be really horrible... but was pleasently surprised. It's good to have good friends and to be able to do what you love to do. Life is getting better - because I have made some changes in my life! :) Happy Easter to all!
Waking up sick way beyond the worst flu and having no immeadiate means for "medicine". Your mind races, you have an overwhelming sense of being afraid and anxious and you wish you could wake up from this bad dream and be normal like others. When you're addicted to heroin it
is not a dream ,but your everyday reality. You eventually find a way to get money,not legally of course,and then search for the medicine. Hoping you will not be arrested, not get ripped off,and not have anything go wrong. You now have the stuff and get yourself well. For a moment or two you feel
like a million dollars and then you're left feeling "normal",at least not sick at all. Then you worry all over again about your next dose and how to get money yet again to repeat the horrible ritual. I would look in the mirror and thought I looked great. Much thinner than my usual chubby
self,thinking that if I didn't shower daily that the natural oils would compliment my long cherry red hair,thinking that no one would take time to notice the track marks all over my arms and legs and that because I was smiling on the outside that people would think I was happy. I was absolutly dying
on the inside and I now believe that people could easily see how terrible my being actually was, especially when they looked into my eyes. That was my life for 7 years. I'm clean now and have to remind myself of how I lived and how deep down I knew this was not supposed to be my life. I can't change
the past but can work on my future like I have been. I'm grateful for being able to live a happy,healthy life again,grateful that God has blessed me like he has. Starting over is not always easy but well worth it. I lost everything to this disease and my medicine now is recovery and I am getting all
the things I lost back again...especially myself. Thanks for letting me ramble, it felt good, and Happy Easter to everyone. -K
i don't know what? When I feel hurt by something that is said I am told it is just a joke and I should be laughing. It is not true that we all have bountries that certain things are not funny. I think about what tina said about what is my worth! What is my worth if I don't
set those bountries. If I don't say I didn't like that don't talk to me in that way. That is not funny. I feel like I am hurting the other person so I am or becoming afraid to say anything. Now I am leting someone talk to me anyway they want too. not good. I have to have limits i have to have worth.
I am worth alot. somethings are not funny....I am a person with self worth and I have an opion. dam it!!! I need to pratice that my delivery.
a new door to the universe opened the other day. it came because i asked. because i needed it. what wonders i see unfolding every day on this path that i have chosen. thank you, guides. thank you, universe.
help me I am losing my mind. I don't know what i am doing. I keep on ending up with these guys who only have themselves on thier minds. I don't seem to fit in anywhere. I don't think i should be with anyone right now. I have to totally get into me. just let go of what are
they worried about. I don't understand why i can't have feelings. do i feel the wrong things. do i say alwayss the wrong thing. my guy is always saying that i am negative. I feel he says mean things and he says he is not mean I am negative and if i would just let that stuff go i would think he was
funny. i hear him talking to other people in a gentle way and just yelling at me. is he being gentle with me and i just hear the yelling. he seems mad and i feel like i am the cause. we have lost communacation. at this point in time he doesn't want to talk to me and i can't talk to him. I am trying
to talk to him or i think i am trying to talk to him. maybe i am depressed. I don't want him to be right. i guess i don't want to talk to him because he is so great yeah right. I am not a less than human being then he is. why is he trying to convince me. help me.
My mother passed away a few weeks ago... This month marks three years since my father passed away. I like to think that Mom chose to leave at this holy time of the year to be reunited with my father. Her death came at the end of 8-1/2 months of terrible illness and suffering.
Mom and Dad met at a dance back in the late 50's. Mom was sitting at a table talking with a fireman... This didn't stop my father… Dad was so taken away by my mother's beauty and light that he walked right up and asked her to dance. She said, "Yes," and the rest is history... I
imagine he met her at Heaven's gates last week, held out his hand, and asked her to dance. I'm sure they are dancing in Heaven right now.
"In order to have a pocket full of dreams.........One must first have a hand filled with vision." Logan Tearabar.com
"God created man- Man created Religion" Last Night an Angel Stopped By..
"When I was a child a small bird died in my hand.
My mother said I had held it too tightly
I guess it ws because I had loved it too much
And often with you I feel like that child again
And I'm afraid....." Just Passing Through circa late sixties/early 70's
Did anyone watch the special this past weekend about tv evangelism? The "healings" delivered by two men in front of audiences as big as 1 million. Where sick people came on stage and once they were touched by these men, they were supposedly healed. This disturbed me quite a
bit. We all want to believe so bad that miracles and healings happen, but do they happen this way? And they also showed how the brain gives you these good feelings...the feelings of God and love. This made me even more confused. I love God, but are the feelings of love I feel from him or my mind? I
am usually a little more secure in this subject, but today I am feeling unsure. With my entire heart I believe in God. I feel a presence around me at times, and I do believe in heaven. But do I just choose to feel this way and believe this to make myself feel better about life and death? If God
doesn't exist, how did all this come to be? If anyone has some comforting words, I would love to hear them.
it is 4pm and i am very tired. i feel better about my health than i have in a long time. i saw dr. Chaffin this morning after i had all kinds of tests ran last nite at the hospital. he tolds me my main problem is the weight i am carring. i have to lose weight.that seems
minor to what i thought was wrong with me. so today is the first day i am starting to eat right.i went with mother to her therapy appt. she wants me to go with her thurs. but i am not going to forfiet my thaarapy appt. to do that. i guess i feel bad about that but i have got to take care of me too.
ernie has been a nerve wrackeer to me today. he cant stand it when i do anythng with out him. he has been in here and as iam trying to write my fellings in this he is doing everything he can think of to distrsct me and hopes i get off the computer. even to the point i told him in a very nice voice i
was busy with this. his comment was you are too busy to talk to me. that pisses me off.i am nervous and i dont feel very good and that is caused by him being so self-centred. i need time to myself to not have to feel like i am a kid and he is my boss. he makes me feel guilty if i get on the computer
or try to read or watch what i want on tv unless he is watching what ever crap he likes. or he is on the computer. he is so needy and selfish and so are all his kids. they think they need to know our every move. i fell like piss on all of them.. today is April 17 01
I am doing OK. I am being real, being me.
You didn't leave a name, but this is for the person who was asking about God and talking about the Holy Roller on TV, healing people. I understand your doudts and confusion. I suggest the book "Last Night An Angel Stopped by." I promise you you wont be dissapointed. It's
evedentally a true story, and it will answer many of the questions you asked.......See ya...... Shane
If God created anything better than the woman- He surely kept it for himself.
Thanks Shane. I appreciate you writing me. I am about to take a look at that book. I have actually heard of it, but I do not know much about it. Thanks again, and I will be sure to let you know what I think of it:)
I think that the happiest people are the ones who wear the fewest masks.
It's the eve of my fortieth birthday, and I can hardly contain the deep joy that I feel. Such good friends, family and animal companions. I am grateful that I discovered that these were the only truly important things at such a young age!
I know that I am my happiest when I "drop the masks".
To the one who wrote on TV Evangelism,
I didn't see the show, and I'm not sure that I have comforting words . . .
But perhaps instead of feeling that "God is all around you", you will begin to recognize that God is within you as well.
Then you will know that the feelings you have, and the questions you have are all as they are meant to be--perfect--as the Creator made you. Try to remain patient and sit with these feelings. The answers will come during the journey we call life.
You said it perfectly. God is within us also, not just around us. I think I get scared sometimes of the feelings I have, but I need to learn to sit with them and to be comfortable with feelings of doubt. God did not give us the knowledge to know all. We will all have
feelings of confusion and doubt, but as long as we continue to have faith...I believe that is the most important thing. This journey we call life will help us to better understand God's love and the true meaning of life. Thank you for your comforting words. They were comforting to me, and I
appreciate them dearly.
"he two most powerful an important moments of your life are birth and death. The in-between times are spent learning about life and God. Not just what they mean to Mankind, but to each individual."
"To have faith, one must oftentimes believe in the improbable. To have vision, one must see beyond the limits of the human eye. To have courage, one must know fear, for, in facing fear, we become brave. To gain wisdom, one must seek knowledge, not only for himself but for
Mankind. And, within that knowledge, he shall find truth." Amanda
I can only pray for my friend that has chosen to do it "her way" again. HER way has never worked and she believes she can actually control her heroin addiction. I can already see the changes, calling into work often, leaving early, looking rough, not taking proper care of
herself and minimizing her drug use but also saying that she needs to stop before the bad things start to happen again. That doesn't appear to be someone that has a "control" over their addiction. There is NO control over it and we fool ourselves by thinking we can. For me, it took me years and
years of doing it my way until I surrendered and am now in recovery. I feel for her and her husband who has also relapsed, we've all known each other for over a decade. But, I also thank the Lord that it is not me. -K
To "Journey We Call Life",
You are most certainly welcome!
Isn't life just truly fascinating? Imagine how dull it would all be if we didn't have these questions to ponder. Remember when we didn't think this deeply? Before we woke up?
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change the things to change I can and the Wisdom to know the difference. Today I had the courage to report a fellow employee for client abuse. Now I need the courage to stick and stay until the investigation is over.
Some of her friends wi going to very upset, but I know I did what was right.
You did a good thing Patricia. Don't let anyone tell you differently. Honesty is the best policy ALWAYS.
I feel bad hope you find peace
Having one of those double digit birthdays last month I was depressed @ where I am at this time in my life and how far behind I am where I had always thought I was going to be then a friend reminded me "Never complain about the gift of olde age it's a gift denied to many."
Thank you God for all the gifts I take for granite adn use as excuses to give into depression and help the gratitude in my heart to release me from such a useless habit. Love......KaF
This is my first time at this site - what a pleasant surprise. Thank you. For those who have experienced broken relationships, life does get better. In one of the posts, someone said you will find better and that is certainly true. Many times when someone breaks up with us,
especially if a third party is involved, we women tend to take it personally. What I found in my situation is that he is the one who had the problem, and as God has brought me out of a very hurtful situation, I am able to see much more clearly just how many problems he really does have. Now I am
thankful that we are no longer together. Life has grown into a rich, beautiful garden. I could not have said that a year ago when I was awash with jealousy, hurt to the core, but now - life is good. Very very good. Thanks again for this site. I hope this message is an encouragement to someone.
It is a beautiful day today in MA. The sun is bright and you can see how people are reacting to the spring air. I love my life today. It's been an awful long time since I've been able to say that and really mean it. Tomorrow I am recieving my 7 month recovery coin and I
thank God everyday for helping me achieve this. Especially considering that all the years I was using heroin I couldn't stay away from it for more than 12 hours at a time. I'm thankful to be free and to be able to enjoy life and all it has to offer today. -K
"My goal in life is to have my life touch other lives, to have an effect on someone or something. To prove to my self that I did more than merely exist. To have had a purpose, to reach even one person, to whom it will have mattered that I even lived at all. If only to have
past through and touched their lives." Logan
I feel sort of funked out today. Tired, just sort of blah. I've been thinking about it and have come to the conclusion that it's ok to feel like this sometimes. When it happens to other people I usually tell them "not to worry", "we all go through that sometimes", but, to
feel it my own self usually results in not taking my own advice and feeling crappy. I tend to feel as if I'm not allowed to have a "blah" day, looking at it as something relating to failure. I am just like anyone else in this life and there really isn't anything wrong with having the "off" days but
it does matter what you do with those days. If I don't accept them and try to turn them into a positive, then I will let the bad outweigh the blessings I've experienced lately in life. I don't want to do that today or any other day for that matter.-K
Most of the thins worth doing in the world had been declared impossoble before they were done. Chao
I had such a wonderful weekend, I would rather not be at work right now but I work on sundays so I am here. My husband and I spent the time we had together laughing, loving, eating and watching movies. Now he's on his way back to his home an hour away from me and we will
have to wait another week to see each other again. I always thought having to be in a long distance relationship would spell disaster. I'm thankful to see that it was the best decision we could of made considering we both needed so much to work on our own recovery. There will be a time again when we
will live together and I believe that until we are ready to do that, that God will keep our love and our hearts together in his care.
When God measures a man, He puts the tape around the heart instead of the head. CHAO
CHAO, You always have wonderful, inspiring, thoughtful thoughts to post. I just wanted to make you aware that you are appreciated and I look forward to seeing your name at the end of those wisdom filled entries. Thank You. -Kristen
Thank you Kristen and this one is for you
Live truth instead of professing it
Living in truth is bliss for me today. I am honest with myself first wich automatically results in being honest all around. I have nothing if I am not true to myself, when active in addiction I was NOT being true to myself or anyone else for that matter. I am grateful for
where my life is today and can't imagine it any other way. You jarred my thoughts again CHAO, thank you. -Kristen
Dear Chao......Your statement is nice, but perhaps it should say.....
" When God measures a man, He puts the tape around his heart, instead of from head to toe.".
My reason is this. Why would anyone measure the circumference of a man's head to judge anything, other than for a hat size???? Hope your not offended..... Steve
It does sound better the way Steve suggested. Its nice seeing people have input with each other. Im gonna go in my room and try to be creative. Bye Bye. Terri
Not offended....Steve Thank you for your observation but when I refer to a mans head I am referring to a mans intellect and not his fisical, and when I refer to a mans heart I am referring to his spirit. But I like your too. I will use it. Thanks you also Terri.
For the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man lookth on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart. 1 Samuel 16:7 and Kristen I have been following your progress you go girl, and remember.
The way each day will look to you all starts with who you're looking to. Chao
Sometimes theres things we must do that aren't conventional and could quite possibly be difficult and worry-producing, but nonetheless, they must be done, because I have seen beyond these 'limits' society has set up for everyone...I say....we stop being pulled around by
standards society sets...don't conform...transform!
I am in the worst relationship I have ever been in. but i can't seem to shake it. I am expecting a child and so i am holding on to what. i really don't know. i wanted to take childbirth classes and my boyfriend said what ever you want. we get there and he acts like a baby.
complaining to everyone in the room. taking phone calls on his cell phone saying this is..... when he finds out it two hours long he says you have got to be kidding. sits two chairs away from me. i try to talk to him and he says i am negative and depressed. i have come to the point that i don't even
want to talk to him since he is always turning it around on me. his friends say things like he use to be worst. that he has never been happier if this is happiness i don't think i like it. i have been upset about the childbirth classes for over a week.
For mother's day we took the kids to the fair. Paige was not feeling well tried hungry. she was very crabby. it was getting on all our nerves. we sat down to eat and she wouldn't eat. complaining on and on. i was having a hard time eating to i was more thirsty than hungry. he made
her stand up and started lecturing her. i went to get a drink. i was ok with the punishment at the time. when i came back he was still at her. i told him that was enough. he said we are leaving. i said you can leave but i'm not leaving. it was my mothers' day. so he left. me and my kids at the fair.
me 8 months pregnant. you know we had a good time afterwards. i ran into some friends and we talked and the kids did two rides and we went to a concert free tickets from a beer vendor i know etc he has not talked to me since and he won't talk to paige either. she said she was sorry but i think he is
I've been feeling rather melancholy for the last few days. I can't exactly put my finger on the reason why. It's just sort of an all over sad feeling. I am feeling very unmotivated. I really don't feel like doing anything. I hope I feel like myself again soon. RL
To the pregnant woman in a bad relationship, it sounds as if you deserve much better. You are about to bring a life into this world, and you need a father who is going to love that child unconditionally and support you both in good times and in bad. I was in a relationship
similar to yours for 6 yrs (no kids though). He made me happy at times, but at other times he made me miserable. We finally broke up about 3 yrs ago, and I am now engaged to a man who is absolutely amazing. It was extremely hard for me to get over him, but I did it. I am not saying that you should
break up with him, but something has to be done. You must come to some kind of agreement or compromise (maybe counseling), and maybe he will be willing to try harder. But if that can't be done I believe that you will be happier without him. Pregnant or not, you deserve someone who is going to truly
love you and your child. Some people may say that if kids are involved you should stay together. But I believe that is true only if the relationship is healthy. You do not want your child seeing you two argue. And if you are miserable, it will be hard to give your child the happiness that she or he
deserves. I pray that things will work out between you and your boyfriend, that's if he changes. People do change so it can happen. And everyone deserves a second chance. If you two are meant to be, they will be. But if he does not change, then try to stay strong and concentrate on finding that
happiness for you and your baby without him. You can do it. Life can seem so hard at times, but they always get better. I wish you the best. Hang in there. Just remember that everything that was meant to be will be.
I think everyone feels sad and unmotivated from time to time. It is completely normal. If you do not feel sad at times, you may not appreciate the times that you feel happy as much.
Life is Good and shift happens!! earthwomyn
I've had my days when all I wanted to do was crawl under a rock and have it sealed shut forever. Nothing else mattered, life was a mystery to me because I didn't have a healthy relationship with myself or an honest relationship with a higher power. I've learned to have these
necessary relationships now and life is so incredible for the most part. Not everyday is what I would like it to be but it's still better than my old ways of beating my mind, body and soul to the ground. There is always better way of life if we feel helpless, most important is to never give up and
realize we are all special and loved.....everyday! -Kristen
I just picked up a copy of that book...Last night an angel stopped by.......What an experience!!!!...Has anyone else had an experience with a real angel? The book helped me through the loss of someone very dear. Thanks to the two authers. Terri
I have just found this site and would like to ask all generous hearted people to support a little HIV orphanage in Kenya - www.nyumbani.com I am unable to send them money but had an idea that if we all wrote to the big drug companies and appealed to their humanity maybe we
could induce them to reduce the cost of drugs. it costs US$500 a month for each little one: impossible. Please, will you help. Mrs Mzungu.
Impossibilities vanish when an man and his God confront a mountain. Chao
It has occured to me recently that I have not heard the voice of God in my heart in a long while. There are many concerns that stay on my heart and in my mind on a daily basis which I lift up to God in the form of words, tears, questions, etc. When I get quiet inside, all
that seems to surface is more questions and/or frustations. I wish I knew a way to get through all the "stuff" and hear the "still, small, voice" again. I want to hear what God is "thinking" about my concerns. I want to hear the voice that says..."this is the way...walk in it"(Isaiah 30:21) I feel
stuck where I am-emotionally- because I don't know the way and worry that if I take a wrong step I'll only end up in deeper waters... CeCe
"When you come to the edge of all you know, you must believe one of two things...that there will be ground to stand on, or you will be given wings to fly." I can't remember where I found this quote, but hope it helps, CeCe. Good luck. Lizzi.
If you don't go within, you go with out CeCe Neale Donald Walsch Chao
I am visualizing myself with the Jean Houston trip to Egypt next year......I wonder if I can make it happen! Margo
Margo, where can I find more information about the Jean Houston trip to Egypt I Love Jean Houston's work.
Being careful about interests of others is essence of goodness. All religions originated with the aim of making the world a better place to live in. Originators and propagators of most of the religions realized that if everybody works for self interest only there would be
conflict of interests and weaker would suffer more. Hence in most of the religions, any activity which adversely affects others is considered immoral. The biggest challenge confronting religious heads was how to keep man away from doing immoral things. In most of the religions this challenge was met
by taking recourse to concept of God. God exists , in our minds. Till religions keep high level of morality in followers, they are serving their purpose. Goodness can be promoted by treating it as a valuable trait. (B. J. Gupta) firstname.lastname@example.org
Honor is better then Honors. Chao
Hello,My name is Betty.I am a 35 year old house wife and mom..You know I do know that my family loves me but I feel I am taken advantage of..When I have a problem with me it seems like they just don't hear me,and as long as I Cator to there needs its ok with them,,and for my
husband don't get me wrong I love him but it seems that what counts is this life time is his needs and he doesn't look into my heart to understand me,he just says i nag to much,sometimes I feel they would be better off and ok without me.
It's so funny how the little things can really make your day. Today, before work, a friend and myself went to the mall to poke around. There was a booth offering free cell phones with just a monthly payment for the actual service. My friend decided to try to get one and
encouraged me to do the same. I instantly said there was no way I would be able to get one since my credit was not so good due to thousands of dollars built up on past credit cards that I havent paid. When active in drug abuse, I let alot of my bills go haywire. Well, for the heck of it I tried to
get one and I got approved!! My friend did not. I was almost shocked. That made my day....sort of made me feel like I'm not so tainted because of my past using. I welcome responsibility again and can see everyday how things are looking up for me...I am grateful. -Kristen
The art of life lies in a constant readjustment to our surroundings ~~~~~~~~~~ Okakura Kakuzo-Japanese art critic *Simone
I love my past, I love my present, I'm not ashamed of what I've had, and I'm not sad because I have it no longer ------ Colette, French writer
Be proud of the person you are, of your adventure, your story, the characters in your play are only those whom you invite! *Simone
I am finally willing to sit still and shed my rusty exterior. The interior of my soul will's it so. My exterior is my souls palace, therefore; I must treat my body as a palace from now on. I think of how important, personal, beautiful, safe, and cozy a home is. I then think
of my soul and how it deserves a home, just as my body has a wonderful home. How could I have ever expected a beautiful soul to live on, happily in a broken down home? - This all came very clear to me as I saw my neighbors home being burnt to the ground and I was trying to pinpoint why I thought a
burning home was so mournful. Now I know the answer...
To connect so deeply with another soul that they pick up on even the slightest of vibrations across thousands of miles is truly a blessing of love. Celebrate it, embrace it, Cherish it! ~~~~~ *Simone
Surrender...not an easy process...It's possible that Spirit is asking me to enter into this process willingly. I'm "kicking and screaming" not wanting to give up what I preceive as my own way... I'm not even sure how willing I am to be made willing...This stuff hurts...I am
still afraid of falling into the void and being lost... CeCe.
Scott, part of me will always love you. I'm sure you wouldn't believe me if you were here for me to tell, but while I knew the two of you were making a huge mistake, I would never have tried to come between you. Although it hurts from time to time, I wish you well.
The rain today reminds me of days in which long walks in the rainforest refreshed my soul and calmed my spirit. When all of nature reminded me that I was part of divine order ~~~~Simone
To all those who have crossed my path I pray for blessings to fall upon the road of your journey and that at each crossroad you be met by a guardian of your well being. ~~~ Simone
I can agree about surrendering. It took me years to finally surrender and turn my will over to my higher power. I always thought I could controll my addiction and the outcome of the consequences. I experienced so , so much pain as a result of doing it my way. Surrendering
saved my life. Made me realize that I am not alone, not weak, and that I am a worthwhile person that doesn't need to live a life with heroin anymore. Surrendering is not giving up...it's allowing yourself to become free from the pain that plagues you. - Kristen
Kristen, your words rang true in my heart and brought a ray of hope. I'm hopeing for grace to take the next step on my journey with faith. CeCe
Please pray for my husband... he is such a wonderful man, who can make any decision he wants on his own! Please pray that he will know that to be the truth - that he is worthy, wonderful and much more wise than he believes. Thank you! :)
In order to begin to learn who you are, what you are; in order to bring order to your life you must first learn to be still. When you learn to be still, you will hear the voice of Spirit. ~~~~Simone
It is not what a man does that determines whether his work is sacred or secular, it is why he does it. Chao
Everything is looking so good in my life these days, but lonliness is getting the best of me. The man in my life and I have been together for 2 years...as of the last 10 months we have not been living together...we live an hour away from each other and see each other 2-3
times a month. Talk by phone about 5 times monthly due to our work schedules. I love this man, but I've been introduced to something wonderful in an old male friend of mine who I see on a daily basis. I feel torn. Time will tell what is meant to be.....K
I can not forget him. He was my best friend. So many people told us a guy and girl can't be "just friends". They warned us. We didn't listen. We were confused by the feelings we had for each other. We decided to take a chance on a romantic relationship. WE LOST. I lost. I
see him now, 3 years later. His eyes are the same. His laugh, too. We are older, more mature, but I remember being 22 and loving him with my whole heart. It scared me. I was so insecure; I didn't trust his love for me. Now I understand that I must love myself before I can ask anyone else to love me.
I will work on that. I have such a long way to go. But I know what to look for. And I will not make the same mistakes again.
I remember the days of old when a day seemed like a lingering breeze whispering at my soul, I remember the days of present when a day seems like a moment of passion unfold, I remember that there is a future when the days to come are full of hope and my heart fills with love
and I send a thank you by means of a dove to the universe above.~~~Simone
Character is what you are in the dark. Chao
I have an incredibly difficult year ahead of me.. A huge task at hand. I pray for God's guidance throughout the process. Amen.
I would take that one step further and say to you:
[Character] is not only what you are in the dark but what you are in the light.~~~~Simone
I like that Simone thanks and this one is for you
The ultimate measue of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and contoversy. Chao
I finally went to the doctor for anxiety attacks. I have been having them for over a year so this was long overdue. I felt so much better after leaving her office, but now I don't know what to do. She thought it may be my thyroid but the blood tests just came back fine. She
would like to put me on Paxil. I am kind of hesitant about getting on any medication. I know that I need help, but I just wish there was another way. Maybe this is the way. Does anyone experience panic attacks or is anyone on medication for them that could give me some advice? Please help.
There comes a time when one must do what they think is right . They must cast aside doubt and fear and live life to the fullest.
Our Life is but a tapestry of colors, changing with each moth eaten year...collective colors, sometimes in perfect harmony, leading us to the still waters and peace of a forrest lake...the tapestry is full of the blueness of the sky on a warm spring like day of our youth,
the heated sun comes across this work of heart as being the summer or prime of our life where we each make our choices...will it be the shining and brilliant red hue of success or will it be more black, like night, sullen and lost...flowing on in a true blend of golden colors, we recognize the
season of fall, so delicately mapped out on the tapestry of our days and with the leaves that fall and blow and dance upon the ground we too enter our golden fall, knowing that this tapestry of our time is nearly finished...we move on rather hesitant, a bit afraid, and yet knowing that we are mere
mortals, and for this work of art, this tapestry to be complete we must eventually welcome winter, with the trees bare limbs, the cold and the white frost, like the white of our hair, as we near the end, of this our lifes journey, created for us, on this magnificent tapesty of art...Life, it holds
the seasons and for every season there is a time...a time to live and a time to die, and somewhere in between to make the most out of the brightest colors of the spectrum...and so with this, my tapesty is complete, and feeling quite fulfilled, I end my journey with my art now finished...all the
colors turned out in perfect harmoney...as the ice of winter cools down our bodies and we melt away from this life, our tapestry and the mark it leaves behind will be our legacy to the life that God gave to each and every one of us. Theo Onken---Onkenmagic@aol.com
Dear Theo, Thank you for sharing these beautiful words. They truly came from your soul. May God Bless You.
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything. Chao
The presence of God is everywhere around us. In the sweet sparrows flight...the eyes of a doe...in the cool whispering breeze as it plays with the leaves of the trees. The warm embrace of God is upon us as we see a baby's first steps...and children at play...as we see our
elders and listen to their wisdom on life and death... Today I gave thought to the Creator and thought how wonderful to be blessed. ~~~Simone
To forgive is not about forgetting the evil act that was committed, but rather about the act no longer being a barrier to that relationship---- Martin Luther King Jr.
May I always try to remember these words~~~Simone
Life is worth living, we need to experience the moment and cherish this day. For tomorrow is not promised. But I know who holds tomorrow. I wish all of you Let us live in the spirit, let us keep in step with the spirit. The fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience,
kindness, goodness and self-control. These blessings be with you.....
Trust in yourself and you are doomed to disappointment... Trust in money and you may have it taken from you...But trust in God,and you are never to be confounded in time or eternity. Chao
I know God has a plan for us all, and we need to go through what we need to go through, but sometimes I wish I could take a little peep at the map of life....Kristen
I wonder why people make promises they never intend to keep... Not in big things, like love or elections but in the little things that count. The newspaper boy who says he'll save an extra paper and doesn't. The laundry that says your suit will be ready on thursday...and it
Love...well like everything else, we move from promise to promise... I've had a good many promises now...so I can wait for the harvest and some of them to come about. Shane 5-12-01
Today is a gift - use it wisely!
HOORAY! Finally a new fresh start on our life together! Our baby will have a better city to be raised in, our relationship has been tested and can now stand the test of time, and we can leave our troubles behind and start over - JULY 1! The difficulties we have had in the
past 2 years only make this moment sweeter! :)
Motherless and Fatherless, but I am OK with that. Sometimes alone is better than the company they offer. My family starts with me and I pass only good things on to the generations I help to create.
You can't do much about your ancestors, but you can inflience your descendants enormously. Chao
The superior man... stands erect by bending above the fallen. He rises by lifting others. Chao
The past is history,the future is a mystery,and this moment is a gift.That is why this moment is called "the present".
"If your thoughts become carefree and you yearn for distant places to be, come seek a brand new path with me and share the summer wine,
And if along the way we find an understanding of all mankind, we'll go back home with peace of mind and dream another dream." Logan Clarke.... "Just Passing Through"
The strongest evidence of love is sacrifice. Chao
I had a dream last night...the wind was blowing with cherry blossoms and everything was in slow motion. I had a blanket wrapped around me as I walked out onto a terrace looking at the horizon...i remember that it was cold and I was scared at what I saw. I wonder what this
means. I guess sometimes we are all afraid of the future and the unknown but never truly get there...there is always further to go. ~O
i hope to find a true friend some day
To the person having the panic attacks. I too suffered from panic attacks, and was afraid to see a doctor. Finally, I did. I am also on Paxil, and like you was a little nervous or should I say scared about taking it. But I said to myself, "I'm going to do this with the help
of God, and what will be will be". At least I was doing something about it, with the care of a doctor. I'm so happy I did. I haven't had an attack since. I feel much better, like my old normal self again. I no longer feel afraid. I say go for it, give it a chance, your doctor will monitor you. I
think that if you give it some time to work, you will feel so much better. It's such a great feeling to feel "normal" again. Good Luck. :)
open your mind to the wonderful joys of life
Another chapter in my life has been closed. The last two years of my life with this man and now it is over. I could feel something was not right, he cried the last time we talked saying he loved me and didn't want us to part ways. I have not heard from him since. This
hurts....alot. This is part of the plan of my life...I take accept these things because I know it is meant to be. I am to learn from this and it will open new doors for me. Of coarse I am somewhat scared...but in my heart I'm sure it will be for the best. I just need to take care of me right now,
and I am in a good way. -Kristen
Kristen, you cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore...Chao
Always a pleasure Chao, thank you for the wonderful insight. I do know that God will only give me what I can handle....this will help me grow. -Kristen
I never again want to know what it is to hurt......If thats what loving does..........maybe it's better just to like. Shane...
Shane and Kristan I would like to tell you a very old story about the man who didn't believe in love. This was an ordinary ane just like you and me, but what made this man spevial was his way of thinking: He thought love dosen't exist. Of course, he had a lot of experience
trying to find love, and he observed the people around him. Much of his life been spent searching for love, only to find that love dodn't exist.
Wherever this man went, he used to tell people that love is nothing but an invention of the poets, aninvention og religions just to manipulate the weak mind of humans, to have control over humans, to make them believe. He said that love is not real, and that's why no human could
ever find love even though he might look for it.
This man was highly intelligent, and he was very convincing. He read a lot of books, he went to the best universities, and he became a respected scholar. He could stand in any public place, in front of any kind of people, and his logic was very strong. What he said was that love is
just like a drug: it makes you very high, but it creates a strong need. You can become highly addicted to love, but what happens when you don't receive your daily doses of love? Just like a drug, you need youreveryday doses.
To be continue Chao
The man who didn't believe in love part 2
He used to say that most relationships between lovers are just like a relationship between a drug addict and the one who provides the drugs. The one who has the biggest need is like the drug addict; the one who has a little need is like the provider. The one who has the little need
is the one who controls the whole relationship. You con see this dynamic so clearly because usually in evry relationship there is one who loves the most and the other who doesn't love, who only takes advantage of the one who gives his or her heart. You can see the way they manipulate each other,
their actions and reactions,and they are just like the provider and the drug addict.
The drug addict, the one who has the biggest need, lives in constant fear that perhaps he will not be able to get the next dosage of love, or the drug. the drug addict things, "What am I going to do if ahe leaves me?" That fear makes the drug addict very possessive. "That's mine!"
The addict becomes jealous and demanding, because the fear of not having the next dosage. The provider can control and manipulate the one who needs the drug by giving more doses, fewer doses, or no doses at all. The one who has thebiggest need completely surrenders and will do whatever he can to
avoid being abandoned.
The man went on explaining to everyone why love dosen't exist. "Whar humans call love is nothingbut a fear relationship based on control. Where is the respect? Where is the love they claim to have? There is no love. Young couples, infront of the representation of God, in front of
there family and friends, make a lot of promises to each other: to live together forever, to love and respect each other, to be there for each other, through the good times and the bad times. They promise to love and honor each other, and make promises and more promises. What is amazing is that thay
really believe these promises. But after the marriage-- oneweek later, amonth later, a few months later-- Youcan see that none of these promises are kept.
To be continue Chao
I work with youth who are considered "bad" because they don't like being told what to do. But really these are scared, angry, lost and unloved children in desperate need. Someone help me to help these children. TeAra Rose
Purest Thought, Oh Purest Dream, Take us on a journey through now, to Forever. Take my life and my mind with you, Be here with me, and let me be. Days come and go, and - you know Reality checks in once in a while. All the time, you are on my mind mind, Do you think of me
sometimes? Finally finding my feet in this world (it's taken a while) My future is clear, I know why I'm here To heal the world and spread the word And be all I know I can be.
Rhiannon - The Writer, The Healer, The Sourceress
Hi my name is Michele and I adore this site! I am trying to find my passion in life. I cannot spend my life doing things that do not nourish me spiritually, but that seems to be left out of the workplace. I want to know if others are dealing with this dilemma as well.
The man who didn't believe in love part 3
What you find is a war of control to see who will manipulate whom. Who will be the provider, and who will have the addiction? You find that a few months later, the respect they swear to have for each other is gone. You can see the resentment, the emotional poison, how they hurt
each other, little by little, and it grows and grows,until they don't know when the love stops. They stay together because they are afraid to be alone, afraid of the opinions and judgments of others, and also afraid of their own judgments and opinions. But where is the love?
He used to claim that he saw many old couples that had lived together thirty years, forty years, fifty years, and they were so proud to have lived together all those years. But when they talked about their relationship what they said was, "We survived the metrimony". That means one
of them surrendered to the other; at a certain time, she gave up and decided to endure the suffering. The one with the strongest will and less need won the war, but where is that flame they call love? They treat each other like possession: "She is mine." "He is Mine"
The man went on and on about all the reasons why he believed love doesn't exist, and he told others, "I have done all that already. I will no longer allow anyone to manipulate my mind and control my life in the name of love." His arguments were quite logical, and he convinced many
people by all his words. Love doesn't exist.
To Be continue Chao
Today is the longest day. From here on in it's all downhill to Christmas! May all the blessings of the four elements shine upon you all this Summer Solstice, and may we all honour mother earth on this her finest hour. I sit here, watching the sun settin across the tree tops,
showing no sign of abating as it glows hot and white in the evening sky. Soon the colours will begin to deepen and the true beauty of night will emerge. Look into the night and see the sky; the stars and the moon rising. Namaste to all who love and honour our mother. Namaste to all who hold the
power in their hearts. We are all gods on earth and together we can celebrate life eternal. Rhiannon. The writer. The poet. The sourceress.
CHAO, I cant wait to read more....thank you!! -Kristen
The man who didn't believe in love part 4
Then one daythis man was walking in the park, and there on the bench was a beautiful lady who was crying. When he saw her crying, he felt curiosity. Sitting beside her, he asked if he could help her. He asked why she was crying. You can imagine his surprise when she told him she
was crying because love doesn't exist. He said "This is amazing-a woman who believes that love doesn't exist!" Of course, he wanted to know more about her.
"Why do you say that love doesn't exist?" he asked. Well, it's a long story, she replied. I married when I was very yoing, with all the love, all these illusions, full of hope that I would share my life with this man. We swore to each other our loyalty, respect, and honor, and we
created a family. But soon everything changed. I was the devoted wife who took care of the children and the home. My husband continued to develop his career, and his success and image outside of home was more important to him than our family. He lost respect for me, and I lost respect for him. We
hurt each other, and at a certain point I discovered thatI didn't love him and he didn't love me either.
But the children needed a father, and that was my excuse to stay and to do whatever I could to support him. Now the children are grown and they have left. I no longer have any excuse to stay with him. There's no respect, there's no kindness. I know that even if I find someone else,
it's going to be the same, because love doesen't exist. There is no sense to look around for something that doesn't exist. That is why I am crying.
Understanding her very well, he embraced her and said, you are right; love doesn't exist. We look for love, we open our heart and we become vulnerable, just to find selfishness. That hurts us even if we don't think we will be hurt. It doesn't matter how many relationships we have;
the same thing happens again and again. Why even search for love any longer?
They were so much alike, and they became the best friends ever. It was a wonderful relationship. They respected each other, and they never put each other down. With every step they took together, they were happy. There was no envy, jealousy, there was no control, there was no
possessiveness. the relationship kept growing and growing. They loved to be together, because when they were together they had a lot of fun. When they were not together, they missed each other.
To be continue
Chao thanks Kristen I am glad you like it.
As much as I am used to beating myself up over things that I have no control over, I cant do it this time. I've done more work on myself than I give myself credit for. I can see that I am a woman of dignity, that I deserve all that is good in this life. I cant controll what
others do, only take care of me. I hurt over this failed relationship of the last 2 years, but it is happening for some wonderful reason and each day will get better and better. -Kristen
The man who didn't believe in love part 5
One day when the man was out of town, he had the weirdest idea. He was thinking, "Hmm, maybe what I feel for her is love. But this is so different from what I have ever felt before. It's not what the poets say it is, it's not what religion says, because I am not responsoble for
her. I don't take anything from her: I don't have the need for her to take care of me: I don't need to blame her for my difficulties or take my dramas to her. We have the best time together: we enjoy each other. I respect the way she thinks, the way she feels. She doesn't embarrass me; she doesn't
bother me at all. I don't feel jealoue when she's with other people; I don't feel envy when she is successful. Perhaps love does exist, but it's not what everyone thinks love is."
He could hardly wait to go back home and talk to her, to let her know about his weird idea. As soon as he started talking, she said, "I know exactly what you are talking about. I had the same idea long ago, but I didn't want to share it with you because I know you don't believe in
love. Perhaps love dose exist, but it isen't what we thought it was." They decided to become lovers and to live together, and it was amazing that things didn't change. They still respected each other, they were still supportive of each other, and the love grew more and more. Even the simplest things
made their hearts sing with love because they were so happy.
The man's heart was so full with all the love he felt that one night a great miracle happened. He was looking at the stars and he found the most beautiful one, and his love was so big that the star started coming down from the sky and soon that star was in his hands. Then a second
miracle happened, and his soul merged with the star. He was intensely happy, and he could hardly wait to go to the women and put that star in her hands to prove his love to her. As soon as put the star in her hands, she felt a moment of doubt. This love was overwhelming, and in that moment, the star
fell from her hands a broke in a million little pieces.
Now there is an old man walking around the world swearing that love doesn't exist. And there is a beautiful old woman at home waiting for a man, shedding a tear for a paradise that once she had in her hands, but for one moment of doubt, she let it go. This is the story about the
man who sisn't believe is love.
Who made the mistake? Do you want to guess what went weing? to be continew. Chao
another silent summer day its been two weeks since I've heard from you you really know how to show that you care you left me here AGAIN you leave me with your EXCUSES until you need my help again you care at your convienience I'm at the bottom of your list, WHY? can you tell
me what I've done wrong? I've only given you all the time, energy, strenght, money, understanding, PATIENCE, that I have. so thanks for the lesson.... there is no one to trust
To H., You deserve so much better and it will come. Don't beat yourself down for others actions, what you need to do is take care of you right now and life's wonderful possibilities will show themselves. I can relate to your pain, it will get better and you will get
stronger. Hang in there- Kristen
The man who didn't believe in love part 6
The mistake was on the man's part in thinking he could give the women his happiness. The star was his happiness, and his mistake was to put his happiness in her hands. Happiness never comes from outside of us. He was happy becouse of the love coming out oh him: she was happy
because of the love coming out of her. But as soon as he made her responsible for his happiness, she broke the star becaose she could not be responsible for his happiness.
No matter how much the woman loved him, she could never make him happy because she could never know what he had in his mind. She could never know what his expectations were, because she could not know his dreams.
If you take your happiness and put it in someone's hands, sooner or later, she is going to break it. if you give your happiness to someone else, she canalways take it away. Then if happiness can only come from inside of you and is the result of your love, you are responsible for
our own happiness. We can never make anyone responsible for our own happiness, but when we go church to get married, the first thing we do is exchange rings. We put our star in each other's hands,expecting that she is going to make you happy, and you are going to make her happy. It doesn't matter
how much you love someone, you are never going to be what that person wants you to be.
That is the mistake most of us make right from the beginning. We base our happiness on our partner, and it doesn't work that way. We make all those promises that we cannot keep, we set ourselves up to fail. The man who didn't believe in love from The Mastery of love by Don Miguel
That was wonderful Chao, thank you. It is so true, if we rely on someone else for our own happiness then what are to do if if does not work out? Things just dont work out all of the time, but that doesnt mean it can't work out, it just takes two people to both give and we absolutly
need to love our own selves first and foremost. If we dont have ourselves, we have nothing. -Kristen
It is so true that we are responsible for our own happiness, yet when we involve others in our lives we must also remember that we have invited them in and that we continue to awaken their interest. To be committed and involved is an action of responsiblility not of
waywardness and selfishness.The true act of love is to remember who you have involved in your life~~~~~Simone
MISS.TINA........ GOD WILL NEVER FAIL THE ONES WHO PUT THIER TRUST IN HIM.....
The man who fears no truths has nothing to fear from lies. Chao
Today I've decided to slow down and go at my own pace.For as long as I can remember I have put a rush on my life.As my eyes open a little wider I see a little clearer.For this I am thankfull msqto
Today is a "big" birthday. I could've gotten into feeling sorry for myself for, oh so many reasons. However, some dear friends at work celebrated my birthday all day long and pulled me (reluctently at first) into the celebration. There were presents, cake, party hats,
streamers, and lots and lots of laughter. I am very, very grateful. Thank you God for these people who cared so much that they wouldn't "leave me to my own devices" on such a special day. I pass along the blessing of friendship to all who pass this way... CeCe
Men will spend their health getting wealth; Then gladly pay all they have earned to get health back. Chao
You are just there to remind us that we who have held to the chains of responsibility and accountability can fall to the abyss of cold and rain; to the darkness of our own ice cold caves and to the hold of our own pain~~~ Simone I love you
Who do you see when you look in the mirror? Who would you like to see? now who do you see when you look in the mirror? Who we believe we are was taught. Who we are just is,alway's was,and forever will be. Pure love. msqto
What do you do when somebody you share a mutual loving friendship with starts to ignore you until they need your help? My dearest friend has been pulling this a lot....they claim to be *so* busy...and it ends up that theres only time for me when they need help. Now I know
deep down this person does not mean to use me but that sure is what is happening anymore...its hurting very badly and I want to confront her somehow or do SOMETHING because I don't think she knows that shes hurting me...any advice please? thanks in advance.
Amelia: First you must be honest and true to your feelings.. Then you must tell your dear friend that her actions are hurting you.... Then if she continues her actions you must accept that this is a journey in which she is passing and continue your own.. ~~~Simone
You cannot live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you. Chao
Every moment of your life is infinitely creative and the universe is endlessly bountiful. Just put forth a clear enough request, and everything your heart desires must come to you. Written in *Creative Visualization May all your dreams come to fruition ~~~Simone
The first duty of love is to listen Chao
I got my 9 month recovery coin over the weekend and I was alone thinking...My life is good. My way of coping with my problems was always to turn to heroin, adding just more and more problems I was afraid to deal with. Having the recent split of the man in my life for the
last 2 years was not easy. The pain was all around me, but I chose to feel it and look for the positive in this situation. I did not need a drug to ease my pain and for that I am thankful. I feel better already.....Kristen
Measue wealth not by the things you have, but by the things you have for which you would not take money. Like your 9 month recovery coin. Congratulation Kristen Chao
My friend lost her mother almost a year ago today. Now, a year later, she has found a 'replacement' mother, and it makes me literally feel ill that she treats this woman as if she is her mother. Besides psychological help, is there anything *I* can do for her? There is no
talking to her without her getting upset and she won't listen to anyone:(
Gracie, I think it is wonderful that your friend has found someone who she can love like a mother. What a blessing! I think you need to worry a little less about others and perhaps focus more on yourself.
I feel a spiritual restlessness that is below the surface. Seeking a community that fits me--that focuses on the feminine side of Christianity. Hard to find in a small town....Helen
To the one looking for a true friend: You have only to look in the mirror and your closest friend is there...
Thank you for having such a wonderful site. You can visit my site at www.fullofdreams.com
Shawn - Minneapolis
Day after tomorrow is my birthday. I hope I have the courage to be happy on what I still think is a special day. May I make a concrete beginning toward my dreams by living them every day. The Universe is with me and in me. In the Present Moment is all there is to be...J
If you have one true friend, you have more than your share. - Thomas Fuller I am blessed to have such a friend in you and will always have you in my heart whether you are near or far. ~~~Simone
Responsibility is the thing people dread most of all. Yet it is the one thing in the world that develops us, gives us manhood...fiber. Chao
I am trying to understand what the hell is going on. I just had a baby and I adore him. I am with a man that doesn't know how to get close. He sometime says all the right things and then I lose him somewhere. I don't know. I have to go back to work and I want to work part
time. Whenever I say something about it he says I want to quit. I don't want to quit. I am feeling very lonely. I can't seem to talk to him. I don't feel like he is listening...
Once upon a time, many years ago, I felt that life was nothing but a dark hole that I was falling through. I saw no Light, felt no hope and wanted desperately to end the pain I lived in day in and day out. Of course it all revolved around a man that I couldn't have. A dear
friend, the last friend I allowed close to me, shook my soul to it's foundations when he told me he didn't want to talk to me again. He said I had become the pain in my soul. That I was no longer a person, I was nothing but the pain. That's all I saw, all I talked of, all I thought about. And then
he hung up on me. My whole world went numb. I felt abandoned and alone until I re-listened to his words. He wasn't saying them in anger, he was saying them in pain. He had lost a friend when I was no longer around. I HAD become nothing but pain. I couldn't talk or even think about anything else but
how much pain I was in. He couldn't share his life with me any more, I didn't want to allow anything else in my life.
He was right in everything he said, and I made up my mind right then that I could find other things to think about during my day. That I could choose to stay in this world of pain until it killed me or I could choose to try to see other things. It wasn't easy. I slipped many many
times but it got easier. You notice a flower, or a song.. a sunset or a childs smile. You read a book or just enjoy the quiet during twilight. Small things. And when I caught myself starting to fall into depression I would STOP and realize in that moment I had a choice! I could fall back into my
depression or I could look for something else. I started to volunteer at a place where I met some very nice people, I made many friends, and things got easier.
That was 30 years ago and it's hard to even imagine myself in that dark a place. Today my life is a blessing.. every day. I have two beautiful children and seven precious grandchildren. I have many friends and a life filled with love.
Remember: You can remember yesterday; you can plan for tomorrow.. but the only power that you ever have is RIGHT NOW! Each moment of each day you have a choice in who you are, how you react to what's given you. Each pain is a blessing, an opportunity to grow and learn. Each small
encounter is an opportunity to share a smile or just a warm thought. You choose each moment. We all do. You can choose to suffer with the pain given you, or you can choose to turn from that pain and search for something else; something beautiful, something that feeds you instead of eats you up
What a lovely site! Thank you for letting me share.
Wath a beautiful story the Power of Now Thank you
The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance; The wise grows it under his feet. Chao
It is impossible to have others feel the way you feel but I wish it could be at times. The man I had been with for 2 years and I got into programs an hour away from each other so WE could have a better future together. Things have not felt right now for months, lack of
communication on his part despite my asking for more. No contact with him for almost 2 months. I continue on with my life, doing well for myself, met a new friend, got a car, etc. He now calls as if nothing was wrong telling me that he is in a detox because he was using drugs again but now knows
what he wants, to be clean. Well, I thought that is what we wanted before? I understand we make mistakes but I cant afford to go backwards, not even one step back. He feels I have deserted him but I need to take care of ME. This hurts...alot. Kristen
For the person who wrote about healings and doubts about God....I strongly encourage you to listen to your doubts and seek answers. Most people of strong faith have had strong doubts. I believe God tells us enough about himself in nature (including our souls) to make us want
to know Him. In Jesus we find someone who claims to be able to show us who God is....and lives/dies/lives in such a way as to back up his words. Find out more about him and about the historical proof of his life and those who wrote about him. (And please don't equate what you see on TV with truth
about Jesus. A lot of people believe in Jesus who are appalled by TV preachers and healers.) Seek and you will find.
Hi, my name is Debbie and I don't know if this is what you want but I just needed to share my story and my fears. I live in Oklahoma and have 4 children, 2 grown and 2 at home. My youngest daughter had a rare form of cancer 4 years ago and we lived in children's hosp for
almost a year. They told us she wouldn't make it. Our faith saw us through and she is cancer free. As soon as we got home to stay, my father in law was attacked in his home and suffered brain damage so we brought him to rental house to live with us and care for him. We lost everything with our
daughter's cancer and had to start our lives over after 40. We never had a lot but we had bought our first home finally and we lost it. I took care of my father in law 24/7 for the last 3 years until he had to have more care than I could give. He is now in a living center. We thought we would be
able to peice our lives back together and maybe I could find a job and go back to work and maybe we could try to buy some kind of little house so maybe by the time we are on SS we would at least have a home. But as soon as we got dad moved, by husband suffered a heart attack and had to have a triple
bypass. I guess I'm really feeling exhausted now. I know God has a reason and a purpose for everything and I know it's always suppose to work for His good but I am really finding it hard to accept that none of our dreams have come true in life and what few we got close to have been shattered by
circumstances beyond our control. I have no real work skills and we live in a very small town. Our town was hit by a tornado just over 3 years ago and we lost most of the companies who provided jobs. I feel like I'm running out of time and have so little hope left. I have always been a determined
person and have tried to do what is right by God's laws but I really feel alone and I tell myself that He is with me but I just don't even want to get out of bed anymore. We have no insurance, we have no income right now and I haven't a clue how we're going to survive. I know I'm not the only person
who has had tough times but I feel like it right now. I guess I just needed a place to share my sorrow. Thank you! Debbie Doyle
Today is the beginning of what I've always known....~~~Simone
Debbie, it sounds like you've had to deal with a huge amount of difficulties! If we were anywhere close I'd give you a huge HUG.. hugs don't make things better but they're still nice to get when you're overwhelmed some times.
Debbie, I just got off the phone with a friend, and we were talking about a professor at our seminary. He and his wife planned to be missionaries, many years ago, but at a very young age she died of cancer. He remarried after some years and had children, two daughters and a
son. The son was discovered to have a rare genetic syndrome that essentially caused him to slowly deteriorate and lose all control of mental and physical faculties. This began when he was about four years old. He just died a couple of months ago at age 16. We were of course very sad, but there was
also a sense of relief and a hope that now the family could go on with living. Then we learned that the the boy's mother (the second wife) had decided to leave her husband. She had met someone else via the internet. Now this man has the two daughters to raise.
In talking with a fellow profesor recently, he said, "I'm just tired of being Job."
I'm telling you all this because I think you can relate. And I bet there is someone else further down the road, that you will be able to relate to and help.......just because you have been through so much. I know that doesn't help you now, but I encourage you to hang in there. And
do all you can to find supportive people to be around. Pray for someone to come into your life who can simply be an encouragement to you until you are stronger.
I myself grew up with a mother who was psychotic and abusive much of the time. She has been hospitalized many times. I have suffered from severe depression and even attempted suicide. When I "grew up" i got married and moved overseas (to do mission work), and a war began the very
week we moved to that country! We stayed there three years, then moved back to the States. Just when I thought my life was finally becoming "normal," I had another invasion of depression that challenged my will to live like nothing else had in a long time.
At one point I was so angry at God and so at a loss as to how to see my life and my self, I was talking with a very wise old man, and I kept saying, "Why? Why this? Why that? Why? Why? Why?"
His answer was, "You may never know why. But you do know that God is good. Right now you have to trust that. It may make sense later, or it may not. But you have to trust."
I still don't know why a lot of things have happened, and yet I have found great comfort in trusting God. Because God isn't limited to this life. He knows how messed up it is, and He assures of a life to come where He will make everything right, the way it was meant to be.
Don't give up. Know that I am praying for you now, and I pray that you will know that you are not alone. God hurts with you, and He will stay with you through it all, even when it may feel that He is far away. It only feels that way; it isn't true.
I am ever so grateful for everything that has occurred; for it is the never failing and amazing adventure called: My Life ~~~Simone
I've shed so many tears in silence; such a very loud cry however..........Don't leave me, I love you so very much......
Just now I was on my break at work outside. I was chatting to some coworkers and happened to notice a familiar face walking by. This woman looked right at me and called out my name with the biggest smile on her face. It was one of my ex boyfriend's Aunt who I was very close
to the 4 years I was with this man. I have not seen her in about 7 years and we picked up like no time had passed. For me that is so precious. It was seriously only 2 weeks ago I had went to my father's house and was looking at some old photo albums I keep there. There were alot of pictures of this
ex's family and us and his Aunt of coarse was in them. While looking at the pictures, I was wondering how they were all doing. Now I know, and I'm thankful for us crossing paths once again. Kristen
Today I found this site. For reasons I do not know, I feel I need to write, My story, My heart. I am lost. My husband is gone. I can't find any light. I am numb. Yet I feel so tight. I hurt, I cry, I want to scream. What good will it do? I am so sorry for all the apin, for
not caring, not saying I Love You. Say goodbye?!?! They took that away. Yet, I can't - You aren't suppose to be gone. You were to stay here with me forever and then a day. You got sick and when you did, you left me then only I didn't know. You gave only anger and hate, Yet I LOve You and where did
you go. I need to talk to you more time. To know that You are OK. To understand that you forgive me for all the things I should have and didn't do's. To say to you - I Love You. So confused, so lost, so sorry. Honey I Love You I Miss You & I Need You. I grieve for the man I married, not for the man
that became so angry. I thought I was tough. I was better than you. I could Live Life & make it through. I'm so scared so stuck in place. I was so blind to the gifts you gave. I'm so sorry I didn't understand. The last day we spoke, you & I made plans for the day you'd be home. Where are you? I need
you. I want to know. Are you ok? Am I ok? I don't feel like I'll ever know. Honey all I can say - I'm sorry - I Love You - & please let me know something anything everything soon. These words I needed to write. They only begin to touch upon so much. Thank you for letting me have this place to place
this part of my heart. Sandy Katzzie@hotmial.com
A few years ago I was driving to work on an overcast day and a ray of sunshine broke through the clouds. It inspired this poem:
WALK WITH ME
Walk with me, my beloved with the warmth of the sun and soft breezes holding us gently The world unfolding before all in it’s glory Each small part one of the whole Each sound, each feel, each touch one of wonder.. one of endless sharing .. one of fulfilling love Know with me, my
beloved the beauty of life and joined discoveries
All surrounds us awaiting it’s discovery and in it’s finding gives all in return The oneness of us fills me and nourishes me Smiling, I wonder how could I have lived before knowing Smiling, I know
Play with me, my child discovering the newness and freshness around every bend Finding the joy in all the simple things The things that are so easily missed.. the small happenings.. the ones that rush past Grow with me, my child filling me with the joy and energy of life
My heart and being are overflowing Excitement at the possibilities The beauty of all the things we have yet to find. Wondering, I notice the color of the wind through the old oak Wondering, I accept
Dance with me, my friend celebrating life and love and learning, spirits soaring throughout Accepting all the stages as we go The parts that are joy.. the parts that are so hard.. the parts that hurt Sing with me, my friend the songs bursting in our hearts and souls
There are times that I cannot contain all that is within and it overflows through my eyes Do not be alarmed, my friend. To be so full of all the things there are is a blessing I cherish. I find myself surrounded by such beauty and wonder and it can be impossible to hold.
And times I find myself in shadows unable to adore Those are the sad times .. the times blocked off from all things Those are the times I need you most but also the times I don’t know how to ask For in the darkness I lose touch, I lose sight, I lose light and it can be so hard to
We are all one.. we are all connected.. Pain is mine, Joy is mine, Sorrow is mine, Beauty is mine no matter the origin .. Accepting all as one I accept it all
Walk with me… Play with me…. Dance with me…. Share with me, Dare with me, Care with me… Surrounded.. let us enjoy it all .. every little thing in it’s perfection.
Linda Brown 12/10/97
Aay Ya! There's a blue sky, bigger than the ocean, cool winter breeze. Life. It gets easier if I stop seeking to control everything and everyone.Surrender seems to lead, in fact, to an incredible internal freedom after all.
Seek God first and things you want will seek you Matthew 6:33 Chao
Ruthie is my favorite friend and I'm thankful to have her now working aside of me. Frogs and hugs to her!!! -Kristen
I think my friend kristen is so very cool.She once even had a boyfriend named"Billy Papaya",now how cool is that?
When speaking with a nurse practitioner last month about my depression and fatigue I said I am "struggling to keep my head above water" and she said sometimes it is healthier to just allow ourselves to feel what we feel rather than to run from it and then she advised,
instead of trying to keep my head above water.... to "lay back and float". This advice was very helpful to me. Sal
Lay back and Float................... NOW THAT IS COOL!!!!!!
Today is an in-between day. Not bad. Not great. You know, just day-to-day stuff. I am returning from a 4-day weekend, so I have more physical and emotional energy to handle my job.
Other than that, I feel kinda down in my life. I would like to have more positive people in my life- friends and family. All I can do is work on myself, and make changes in myself. I can't control everyone else.
Today, I am asking that my God of my understanding look out for me and keep me close and safe from outside forces and negative sources. I ask that my Higher Power does the same for all those who write and/or read this board.
The pasted month has been very tramatic for me. My husband starting using drugs again and I am feeling like some of it is my fault. I spoke with him this morning and he only confirmed what I was feeling. Even though I know it is not my fault I still feel that way. Zina Smith
I must reply to your post Zena. Please dont ever feel as if it is your fault because your husband picked up. He has a disease called addiction and he is responsible for that, not you. I know because I am an addict myself. I used heroin for 7 years of my life and have been
clean now for 11 months. Life could not be better for me. I had to walk away from a 2 year relationship due to my man going back also to the drugs. We must take care of ourselves first. There is only so much you can do, dont fall into the blame game w/him. Do what makes you happy and pray he can get
the help he needs before it's too late. Take care of yourself.......Kristen
THEODORA ONKEN THE MIND AS ITS OWN PLACE, AND IN ITSELF CAN MAKE A HEAVEN OF HELL, OR A HELL OF HEAVEN.
The sun still rises, it sets each day, another moment has gone by, more minutes come and go, collecting into hours, then into days and yet I cannot say where. Lost and gone forever from me, they must be with you, in that same faraway place, away from my touch, out of my
sight, gone from my ear. Since you left this earthly plane, I cry to hold your hand, to see your brown eyes, to hear the whisper of your thoughts. My heart mourns and is sad. It has heard that "only time will mend the wounds of losing you." And though that said might be true, my heart holds fast to
the sure and true "I Love You" & "Me Too!" are for our forever and a day.
I Miss You Honey, more today than yesterday. "Me too!"
Our eternal happiness will be in proportion to the way that we devote ourselves to helping others. - J.Sm.
Opposition is evidence of the truth at work. - M.E.E.
I would have never thought that the first time I met you this would lead to such a beautiful relationship. Never did I imagine that you would become one of the greater gifts and blessings that God bestowed upon me. Perhaps my thoughts are those of a fool in love and if they
are of such I can only say that it has never in a million years felt so good to be foolishly in love.
email@example.com writes, i have been trying for over two years to get back in the groove of writing. i know it is due to stuff. single parent, working full time. current relationship. help, anyone out there with free guidelines
Today, I step out on faith and reach for the stars. Today, I will live in and seize the moment Today, I will sing the songs in my heart Today, I will love again Today, I will breathe Today, I will soar Today, I will be Thank you Lord for today....
Until you make peace with who you are, You'll never be content with what you have. Chao
Telling the truth is but a small part of our lives on this our journey. It is easy for you to say, as you seem to be judge and jury to all that you feel beneath you. I knew someone who was desperately troubled and believed that everything said was a lie...she was deeply into
paranoid psychosis...thinking i was everywhere masquerading under many names...i feel for her, as she has truly lost her way in the sanity of her journey. i tell the truth always, and for someone to decide differently shows, that they are beyond the help that the she so desperately needs. Perhaps,
the senile dementia of old age is catching up to one in their 50's, or perhaps too much of the narcotic's that you and your husband use are catching up,,,paranoia wears many faces...profiting from the illegal nose candy, and supplying malibu and surrounding areas does not make you a viable or even
sane enough person to pass judgement on one who has made her peace with God long ago, and all that is right and good with him. you know that i will continue to pray for you within my tapestry as you were once a part of it, before, you spilled black ink all over my life and made all my friends and
aquaintances think that you were stark raving mad...you even succeeeded in shutting down a medical support site, the doctor stating to me in long distance telephone calls that of all the people on that support group, that you and yours need the most help and support, stating very matter of factly
that you were a troubled angry spirit...with cruelty serging throughout your heart. One can only hope and pray that the Creator finds you as your Soul is lost...perhaps then you can be a viable part of my tapestry of life, one can only hope, from me here...in the dessert of my lifetime finishing up
my tapestry, i will be looking for God to find you on some San dee beach, looking to rescue you from your total madness...and bodily abuse and even, yes even criminal activities that have set in motion a destruction so severe that it will take an act of God to save you! Here i am still in the winter
side of the tapestry holding fast to the love, truth and joy that comes in only knowing God and the beauty that a relationship with him holds...no lies here...only truth...why not try it yourself San dee? why not...stop the abuse? the bullying? it will buy you nothing only disgust from the ever
growing population of people who know you for what you are and what you have become...including you too Bobbie! Meanwhile heres to tapestrys of love...and the joy that life brings us every day in some sort of blessing that only our Creator can give.....Theo Onken
Thanks for submitting my thoughts!
This month I will have 1 year clean and sober, by the grace of God of coarse. When I think of what I was like almost a year ago, it's hard to believe that I've come so far. Active addiction for me brought me down to places I never dreamed of being. Heroin took a hold of my
life for almost 7 years. I've seen people die from this and even worse I think is that I know of many people who are still using wich is killing their spirits and smothering their souls. No more waking up sick from withdrawals, no more doing illegal things to obtain money, no more fabricating my
life, no more being in hell. God, I am so thankful to be clean, to love myself again and to be free from heroin. I have wonderful people in my life, I have a wonderful man in my life, life is good and I pray for those still suffering out there. -Kristen
I just recently discovered this wonderful open journal and can relate with the comment already expressed by the person who said "I hope to find a true friend someday". Surely true friends can still be found. I just wonder where they are. V.
If I take care of my character my reputation will take care of itself. Chao
If my thoughts were like a pen and my heart was made of paper, I would sketch a painting made of harmony and the brightest colors of love. ~~~Simone Blessings to all and may the flow of our universe bring synchrocity to all those who seek.
Kristen----my deepest respect and admiration for your success. your soul is now set free to love, live, and share the wisdom it carries. margeaux
To make a very long story very short, today I had a revelation of revelations in my life. Today I am absolutly convinced there are no such things as coincidences. Everything happens for a reason. 09-10-01
My soul hurts for the great loss of live today.
I found this site today in search of something. I feel the need to share a truth, one that I have known for ever it seems but have never said it out load, I don't have any idea who I am because my whole life has been a lie. I am so tired and so lonely in this life I have
created, unfortunatly I don't know how to find the real me, if there is one. I have never asked for anything in my life before but I wish someone would take me by the hand and show me how I can find me. I will hold on tight and I won't let go. 9-16-01 ~Bonnie~
All we need is love. Perfect love cast out fear. God is love. And he will keep us in perfect peace. Good will always comeover evil. God bless you and God bless America. God will resue us and he will restore us for his glory and honor.
I love you more than yesterday, I love you more than now. I love you more than you could have ever imagined anyone ever loving you. I love your essence. I love you~~~~ Simone
I am in love with a Girl,she is 19 years old and i am 27.We both live in the same town and we get along great.I love her so much and i know she does me.the problem is that her parents dissaprove alot! We don,t really know why but it is breaking our hearts.Her Father is 48+
years old and dosn't seem to now any other way of communicating other than violence he has threatened me on 3 or 4 occasions .i'm no softy big built and can fight but i want peace and don't like trouble.They make out it is the age difference and stuff but if only they knew how i felt about her.Why
are people like that i find it hard to understand and to take.I don't think they will ever accept me and will always use violent threats as a detterant against me.What do i do leave the girl i love to find a quieter life ? or be with her and accept that her family will always be around bringing
violence and anger into our lives. I don't know were to turn or were to seek help it is waring me down day by day.It would be nice if someone replied to offer words to raise my spirits. yours
Yo...Paul..........Shoot the father and run away with the young girl!..Rent the movie BADLANDS starring Martin Sheen and Sissy Spacek...But don't get as carried away as they did....Good movie though...It began Martin Sheen's career.
Sept. 27- Today, one year ago today was the last time I injected my being with a mind altering substance. I remember calling the detox in a tizzy, thinking they would tell me to call back the next day as they always did before. They asked me to be there in 2 hours. I used
right before going in, for the last time. Never in my wildest dreams did I expect to embark on this journey called recovery...it is what I always hoped for myself but was too scared to begin. God led me the way I beleive. I went through a halfway house, now I live in sober living. I have a job I
enjoy, a car again, wonderful people I can honestly call my friends today, and most important I have ME again. Tomorrow I will have 1 year clean. Sat. I will recieve my coin in front of over 200 people. They say you should give back to what was so freely given to you. I speak at detoxes once a month
but I feel I want to help, try to give a little inspiration to a young women I know that is staying clean but struggles internally. As I get my coin, and talk a bit, I am going to give her my coin so she can be reminded that we are capable of living a healthy life and I hope she understands that I
believe in her. I am grateful!!!! -Kristen
My thought for the day is: Just because you are a Muslim does not mean you are a terrorist.
When lest you think I am not there is when I am the most by your side.........~~~Simone
Loneliness overwhelms me today. I can't seem to stop my tears. I have no idea from where they come for I should feel so lucky to have the life I have.
The terrorism tragedy has affected me deeply, as I am sure it has most every one of us. For me, it has reminded me of the things that are most important in this life. It has softened my attitude and made me more grateful for life. I find myself being more compassionate,
patient and loving with everyone. Little things that used to irritate me no longer matter. I hope this will not change--it is the one good thing to come of all of this. Tracie
Hi my name is christy stevanovic from Australia I just started to read the book Dreams Dreaming as a Spiritual Practice by Connie Cockrell Kaplan I'm only 21 year old. My past is unexpleld if you know what i mean any way this is my frist time exporlen the Spiritual Dreaming.
Thank you for takeing time out to read this From Christy Stevanovic
i do not know what life has in hold for me...i ultimitely do not want ot know. but i feel as if i am missing something...somethng big. i am trying to figure out how to get intouch with something that is inside me...a certian aspect of joy. i have a few cherished friends, and
a decent job, and am going to college. society would say i ahve a good life, and i do, but i feel like half of my soul is missing.
It has been 7 weeks to the day since my mother, my best friend, died of lung cancer. I feel lost in this world without her. Everyday is a journey through my grief. I am trying so hard to be strong. _ Susan
i am going to try to let love into my life....to love myself. in the unconventional world everything is beautiful. sometimes nothing is better than sitting under a tree andwatching the breeze speak thru the leaves, and the sun glistening as it winkks at you. jp
I believe very strongly that we are in the world to seek to know everything about the Truth and the Truth about everything.
today is much like others full of thoughts and no action but how do i begin to see my soul. Through love of myself and positive feedback.
is it so bad to lie for the good of others? it is a long story, but I hope it all stays under control.... they wouldnt' be able to see it from my point of view and it is all making me nervous...the path that had guided me here as been a spiritual one, and a life-altering
one.....it seems everything went as it should, I believe in synchronity, and that was present in the events that led me to today, but I am also a worrier by nature. Praying for strenght and grace.
I may be pregnant after 3 heart wrenching years of trying and nothing...I go in tomorrow for the test...fear...anxiety...these thoughts shadow the possible joy. Oh Goddess I can't take another disappointment...D
I just recently spent 3 days with a man who has become so much a part of me that when I had to say goodbye, I felt as if I was leaving part of my soul behind. I need him to be patient with me for he was not supposed to happen to me and now that he has happened to me I feel
as if a loop has been tossed into what I thought I had all figured out. I love him so very,very much ~~~Simone
Once again I find myself drawn here, this place to write the thoughts of my soul. Why? I do not really know for those cries my mourning heart cries have yet to be heard. Confused, lost, gray clouds surrounding from all direction is the path life walks these days. Loneliness
holding hands with despair are constant companions through waking hours while fearful restlessness makes sleep dreamless and useless. Life makes no sense for all that whatever was true is now a lie. Changed forever without you. what to do? Why do it? where to turn? How to know?
I Miss You Honey "Me Too"
Mis pensamientos van encaminados a sentirme mejor, más util, ver que realmente todo lo que he leído en libros de autoayuda se convierte en realidad gracias a mi compromiso y a que practico todo esto que he leído, en mi familia, en el trabajo, con mi pareja... y sobre todo
Quiero tratarme realmente bien, amarme, no ponerme en situaciones de peligro, vergonzosas, cuidar de mi de una manera responsable.
Amo mi vida, amo mi cuerpo, mi sexualidad, y la existencia que me he creado.
Paz para todos, os deseo mucha, mucha felicidad
I was blessed with the chance to turn my life around for the better. 13 months ago I had a vague rememberence of who I was and I needed to find me again. 7 years of heroin abuse...I am lucky to be alive. Grateful to have 13 months clean today, thankful to be me, I walk with
my head up high today knowing I did nothing that I did not have to do. I thank God for allowing me to see the special person that I am and pray that I can help others with my story. There is hope even for the worst situations...I know this. Kristen
La realidad es que nos hemos encontrados y que la energia entre los dos es mas con que nadie puede.... Te amo mi amor y algun dia espero que reconozcar nuestro amor como uno que existido entre las edades de tiempo.......................
Seems I have been around the world and back again on a journey that never seemed to end. It was my greatest and best learning experience to date. At times there was pain and a lot of it...my very soul and heart feeling like they were being torn out...but with time, came
understanding and acceptance, that things are not always what they seem and there are going to be things in ones life that willl break your heart, disappoint you badly and just plain leave you in a state of shock, that is where my God comes in...for without my creator in this great big mess of a
world that we sometimes have to deal with I am not sure how I might have handled myself, as I found out with a little taste what it was like to be lied about and persecuted ...now I know maybe just a little of what He went through...I definately am not the naive woman I was a year ago, and I no
longer take things at face value. if this experience or journey has done anything it has taught me that love is the single most important emotion we can own, and without it we have nothing...that without God we are empty and without forgiveness, we will always suffer....I go about my daily life now,
with God firmly by my side, guiding me with His everlasting light assurung me and giving me hope, when the darkest hours come upon me...people will be people, sometimes they are not so nice, sometimes there is just this part of them , this cruelty that will not let go of them, those are who I pray
the most for! Theo Dickson Onken
I have heard journaling is such an important part of growth for inner introspection. Personally I have never been able to do it, or have a desire to. Since I am at my computer hours each day, I thought I'd try it this way. so there is my first entry.
To become unselfish and to help others with words, actions, and wisdom is my goal in life. I will put forward great effort to help others because I know we are all connected---all is one.
I've been inspired to open my creativity once again! I have been made feel as if I can! I have been made feel for the very first time in my life as if someone outside and other than me has faith in me. I don't care what anyone says, Validation of and for another human being
is the one of the greatest gifts we can give one another.~~~Simone
Just when you start to wonder how you ended up with all the apples you did in the big pie of life you realize that all along there was this big beautiful apple pie waiting in a place right where you feel at home. I am hoping wishing waiting to live in that place right now I
just get to visit. But someday. Debbie
LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY - The only condition for love is to love without attaching condition. Conditional love will fade when the condition fades. ~ David Ling
I need time for me and can't seem to find it lately. I would like to be able to nourish my soul without interuption, stare at the sky, get lost with my thoughts to feel more peace. I feel down today, very sensitive. I need to find the time...and quickly. K
The greatest use of life is to spend it for something that will outlast it. Matthew 6:20 Chao
Chao, good to hear from you again....it's been a while but you are as insightful as always. Take Care, Kristen
Kristen, thank you for your kind words. And keep up the good work you sould be proud of your self for all you have done for yourself, you have come a long way. And remember be proud of the person you are, of your adventure, your story, the characters in your play are only
those whom you have invited. Chao
WHO YOU ARE is not your feelings, negative or positive. Neither are you your emotions, your experiences or your thoughts. You said it best, it is time that to let go of "you" and the smaller self which invests in all these things as its identity and therefore suffers, and
instead, seek out the Greater SELF...which does not anguish about what IT is not.
Looking for a pen pal I am looking for a 'destiny' friend. I am taking a 'leap of faith' and really giving in to listening to my inner self and making some real changes in my life. I have taken 3 months off work and for once in my life dedicating my time to me. I want to
make a true connection to my heart and inner self and make it a real part of my life. I would love to correspond with anyone who would like a pen pal - someone to share thoughts with - someone to 'connect' with in a meaninful/spiritual learning way. I believe there is someone out there who is meant
to contact me ..... I am Australian - (female)(aged 50) Please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org Jan
everything seems to be coming together for me right now. my school is going well, i'm in a loving relationship with a boy that i appreicate more and more everyday, my family are all doing okay, and my relationship with god is doing good.
but, for some reason, i just don't feel right. i don't know why. and it's beginning to drive me crazy. please, i would appreicate any comments that could help me out here. i don't know what's missing.
Hi I read you entry in the jurnal today and it stud out to me I am also 50 and have beem looking into my spiritual self. One of the thing that I found most defficult was that I had no one to explan what I was going through. Untill My siritual teacher found me. Anyway I
admire the fact that you have taken time to work on your self and you will find many interesting thing about your self that you did not know. But you must be prepare for what ever comes because this is your journey your adventure your story, the characters in your play are olny those whom you
invite. Be proud of the person you are. and remamber. You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore. I would be honored to be your pen pal. Chao Per1ez@aol.com
I am writing today because I am lost. I have no direction, no path to follow, no where I should be, or anywhere I can be. Why can't I find a calming, tranquil little place of my very own? My heart is filled with quilt and sorrow. I mourn for me husband, my best friend and my
lover. Yet, even though he is gone I know that I was a person of my own exsistence, but where am I? Grief has struck and has taken me away from myself to a place I cannot touch. Please does someone know where I might begin to feel again?
please if you do contact me @ Katzzie@hotmail.com
When we are not sincere we only emit fragments of the kaleidescope.... Why not open the whole picture and let the Tiffany reveal the whole story?~~~Simone
Happy Thanksgiving to the Soulfulliving community...and remember that no matter what we go through... Life is certainly worth living and certainly a blessing..... Thank God for whatever good we believe in and all those soulful spirits we live with~~~ Simone
Embrace your spirits everyone~~~ Simone
I give thanks for my life today...for being able to help others as I have also helped myself. There was a young girl of 21 yrs. Wed. night at a NA meeting that I had never seen before. I talked with her and she was crying. She was in my city for the holiday and knew no one.
She has 4 yrs clean and was upset about family issues. Just being able to talk with this girl and slowly see the tears go away allowed me to feel so good. She felt better she said and we hugged and wished each other a good Thanksgiving. We never even got each other's names. I will remember her
though and I have a feeling she will remember me also. Being able to give is truly something to be thankful about and I am so glad I am capable of doing this so freely today. Isn't that what life is really about? I think so. -Kristen
Live within your wide-eyed soul.
THE TRAINING WHEELS
WHO ARE YOU?..journey inward and be still.
First the Journey To The Center of Our Being begins from the top of the hill rather than the bottom or the outer most Sphere; on a rocky and jagged road that pushes outward in a somewhat downward spiral. DESCENDING into our Earth with the use of our left training wheel and
self-concept of self as FORM. We use all of our bodily might and strength to "lift" ourselves up unto a centeredness so that we might "experience" this Truth called "balance" in Becoming One with the bike. Our might throws us to the other side through the center where we then journey for a time on
our right training wheel or self-concept of self as MIND. There we wrestle with trying to teach and learn, even reason with our intellect on how we might "lift" this false and smaller self up onto this often heard but rarely experienced Truth called "Balance." On the right training wheel of the mind
we study books and read texts, we seek out bike books and balance gurus to such a point where we now become complacent with all the head knowledge we have accumulated on this enigmatic truth called balance to a point where surely we must KNOW. We settle for the Part in thing-king we have the Whole.
Truth is not the mere attainment of all the knowledge in the Universe, but rather, it is the Knowledge of BECOMING.
Some do not KNOW in terms of awareness, even while all KNOW in terms of Being. We have been the bike all along, never having been separate or riding on top of it. Just when one thinks the ego which has jurisdiction over both training wheels has no purpose at all, it is the very
illusory force that brings one through the center as one passes from (L)training wheel to (R)training wheel. At first this moment in enlightenment or experiencial "Balance" atop the bike is small and shortlived and so we go crashing to the pavement on either sides. Yet each time we swing to the
opposite training wheel, we hang a little longer full center at "The Passover."
THEN ONE DAY, for some unknown reason we no longer DESCEND into out earth and natural body, but ASCEND into out spiritual body though entering the REST and Becoming Still. Remember when you were little and you tried to ride your bike day after day only falling to either side. And
then you decided to just put the bike away for the night and rest. In the morning at daybreak you arose, and after the stillness you mounted the bike and rode it with ease. This is the same as "before the cock crowing twice you wil have denied Me(spirit) 3 times." And why does the cock crow? Because
the sun(Son/spirit of man)is about to be LIFTED. In this stillness we surrender our need to seek to a type of death, and without realizing it, are born onto the third day(neither left nor right training wheel, but the center itself) to WHO WE TRULY ARE. Both training wheels are then deployed like a
Father who releases furniture support from the arm's reach of a child when he is not looking so that he might walk...AND THE ONE TRUE BODY RISES. It rises to its awareness of SELF through this so-called phenonemon called "balance" - Enlightenment.
But is this experience of balance(enlightenment) Who You Are? Do you remain complacent and see yourself as one with this "Balance," now teaching as a balance guru the likes of which so many seek while you ride on your training wheels but not rest in your SELF?
Surely there are teachers and gurus of both types. Those that have "Come Forth," even "Risen," and KNOW through the experience of "Balance" just what it is but cannot teach it...
...for how can you teach "Balance?"
One can only bear witness to it. And then there are those who through study and attainment of knowledge attempt to teach the truth instead of pointing to THE REST/SABBATH in the Heart as the means by which to find/experience/know IT, even while they toil on both training wheels and
do not Know this "Balance" they speak of.
WHO ARE YOU?
Are you this "Balance," this newfound enlightenment and awareness?
Surely you are not as this is not the Greater Self. YOU ARE AND SHALL "BECOME" THE BIKE and you have been ONE with the bike and the KNOWN all along, training wheels included. Yet now the mind and the body wheels become instruments that serve the Greater Wheel as all three fall into
agreement as to which(spirit) shall lead in fulfillment of the One Will, instead of a existing as separate indentities of lack. The Body then follows the Mind as the Mind in turn follows the Spirit that now leads. This is what is mean't by the scriptures in that "all three are in agreement." A
distinction between flesh and spirit can now be made. Not that they are separate, as they are not, similar to the hoof of an animal that is now split, yet the hoof remains whole with both distinctions of the split hoof being parts of it. Of this split-hoofed animal(spiritual person) we can now eat
just as scripture says, for they have attained the neccessary earthquake and travail within themselves to split their earth and come to know thy spiritual SELF. It is the same when Jesus broke the bread(natural body) and then handed the gathering of 5000 a fish(spiritual body). Did he not ask us in
ACTS, "Does anyone have a fish(spiritual body)?...just as Mary said at the Marriage of Canaan that no one had any wine(spirit).
After breaking the bread(body)and removing the heavy, massive stone(Goliath self-perception of self as body)that acts as a deterant to man's inheritance; and after unbinding his wrappings(many thoughts) and cutting off Goliath's head(resoning mind) as well, surely this man will
become STILL and the spiritual body will rise through this process called "Ascension." Here you are now an extension of the bike, even One with IT, and there is no longer a "you" riding it.
You are AWAKE!
Yesterday, I was spending some time with my good friend Missy and her little daughter Anna. As we were talking, Anna came up to me with one of her toys and holding it out asked in a kinda baby slur, "what's this?"
I answered, "just is."
She then swung it around at her mother who was sitting next to me and asked a second time to make sure, "what's this?" she asked again. Missy replied, "just is."
Anna then proceeded to then get a menagerie of toys and hand out each one to us, asking over and over, "what's this?" Each time we smiled back at a different toy saying, "just is."
Later I saw Anna sitting with some of her toys in the middle of the livingroom mumbling "just is" as she played with her toys.
Missy and I had to wonder about how if we hypothetically proceeded to make all things alike as in "just is," whether or not Anna would later grow up and have difficulty conversing with the world(?). "I don't know," I said, "but I'm sure not going to contribute to her becoming a
labelmaker." I suppose we were content with causing in her a little confusion now instead of a lot of confusion later. We both know that it will probably never stand as she goes to school, etc, or even when Mom occasionally says something like, "it was only a glass, honey" when Anna knocks over just
another "just is" off the counter breaking not IT, but its glass form.
But, it would be interesting to see what would truly happen if she grew up in a world of "just is" that could never break, nor die.
A new commandment I give to you love one another. John 13:34 Chao
Everyday Spirituality - If anyone is looking for ways to develop your spirituality in daily life, you might try "Discovering Your Spiritual Life." It is an easy to use spiritual self-help book available through 1stbooks.com Soul Friend
I would like to post before I read too much (and change my mind)... I, like many of you, are continually on a quest for answers, but I am realizing every day that there are no answers and only moments. I hope to write a book one day, a book that can reach out and comfort
others, but then I wonder "why on earth would anyone want to read MY book?" I would love to hear your stories or read about your journey - for inspiration, if you want to share... Signed, "ROA Journaler"
I am so happy to share the open Journal with everyone who has been lucky to find this website.i send love to every one,with good luck on there travels in life!!!Everyone has ups and downs in life, so lets pull together and help each other!!! this is a great day because i
found the open journal!!!
MEGAN'S STAR A little seven-year old Ascends… capturing the One.
journal entry 7/01 Our remembrance of WHO WE ARE is in the non-verbal, non-visual, non-sensory part of us, and we try too often and capture the memory of it (Oneness) with our intellect...making our capturing of the one in any moment more difficult.
It’s been too long since I spent some vacationing time with my family. This past summer I did just that in the upper peninsula of Michigan. Two weeks of skiing, swimming, tubing, fishing, golfing, 4-wheeling...you know, all of the "ing’s."
Yet, amidst all the fun, all the excitement, and all the adventure that a life in this body could bring, there was one moment, one sharing with my family that rose above all others.
I have 14 nieces and nephews and I love each and all of them beyond my own heart. One is not less nor more special than the next, but every once in a while I happen upon a special moment with one or enter a special place with another. Two weeks of fun in the sun, and there wasn’t a
more precious moment than the one minute I spent with little Megan.
Have you ever seen a Michigan sky at night without any clouds to block your vision? It’s intense...awe-inspiring...the kind of thing stars are made of. As I held my seven-year old niece this night who was wrapped-up in a white blanket on the end of our dock, a meteor shower
began...what a bonus! I had never quite seen meteors like these either...they seemed not to be shooting, but igniting, as if a star had just exploded...I mean, non-moving, huge flashes. The ones that were shooting seemed like planes falling from the sky - even they exploded once or twice as they
But again, this seemed as a tiny happening when compared to the shooting star I was holding, who in her own little way, was about to explode with a series of thought-provoking questions that only the innocense of a child could answer.
In the softest of voices she asked, "Uncle Tim, how many stars are there?"
My heart kinda fluttered. It’s not that I didn’t know how to answer this one, but rather,I didn’t know what to do. Innocense in a child sooner than later, always gives way to the ego and its ideal of many and separation. Do I throw a fixing wrench in this little precious brain
that’s just beginning to wind along with the World? Although, not enough memory and belief has yet entered her mind to make it hurt, it certainly will confuse her, I thought. In honesty, I was probably more concerned with what her parents and my sister would think of my sanity when she passed on the
My thoughts were interrupted by an even gentler, but longer voice this time...
Meagan: "U-n-c-l-e T-i-m, how many stars are there??????"
It didn’t seem by the softness of her voice that her intellect was asking, but rather her heart. And so that’s where I went also. A simple question deserves a simple answer, right?
So as my eyes looked up with her eyes at over a billion stars above us, I whispered back...
Uncle Tim: "One."
I thought she’d laugh really with no real need for me to explain, but instead, her heart asked further,...
Meagan: "But how can there be only one when I see so many?" Her voice was so innocent...so gentle.
Uncle Tim: "Because you’re seeing with your eyes, little Megan"
Megan: "What do you mean, Uncle Tim?"
(I paused with "A sigh," - how do you tell a seven year old about these things?)
Uncle Tim: "Do you remember how many waves there were out there in the boat today, Meggie?
Uncle Tim: "And how many are there now?"
Megan: "none." (The lake was as calm as glass.)
Uncle Tim: "Actually ONE calm wave Megan, but how can that be...so many waves one minute, and then a minute later - only one? It’s not just the wind, but how you choose to see...Here, close your eyes Megan, and I’ll close mine with you."
Uncle Tim: "Megan, do you remember last Christmas and how many strands you tied together for the lights on your tree?"
Megan: "Three or Four."
Uncle Tim: And when you plugged them in altogether...how many?
Megan: "One big one."
Uncle Tim: Right. Megan, someone once said that knowing (faith)is the assurance of that which is hoped for...so why do we hope for what we see?...meaning that which is real is that which is unseen; or things you cannot see with your body’s eyes, but with the eyes of your heart. Are
your eyes still closed Megan?"
Uncle Tim: Mine too. What’s the very thing that you can’t see, that’s running through the strands of your Christmas lights every year...that’s what we want to see, that’s what is real, that’s the unseen...can you name it?"
Uncle Tim: "Yeah. And though with your eyes you see many many bulbs Megan; tell me with your heart how many electricities there are running through the strand from bulb to bulb?"
Uncle Tim: "Great, you did it." (Man, was I happy, and off the hook) "You saw with your heart instead of your eyes, I said. You saw what is real about your Christmas lights, the unseen part about them. Turn off the switch, the power, the source...and all goes away...lights out.
Turn it on, and they’re back again. The bulbs are many on your Christmas Tree, but they are just empty receptacles; receivers that allows the electricity to shine like a light. In the same way the sky tonight is the Christmas Tree and the stars are the many bulbs; all connected in a strand. These
stars are like the bulbs in that they allow the one light to shine."
"Now open your eyes Megan. Do you see the stars...how many lights in them do you see?" (hope upon hope, fingers crossing fingers. I did my best, and the best I could. I didn’t know whether her eyes were separating them again or her heart was piling them one upon another...she
answered just as softly as she had asked...)
Uncle Tim: ...("thank you" with a tear in my eye.)
Right Meggie, and can you name that electricity and the one light that is shining through that grouped-up star, Megan?
A melted Uncle Tim:
"close enough, Megan...and you’re part of that star."
Megan: "I love you Uncle Tim."
Uncle Tim: "I love you too, Megan."
I want to talk to you today but not sure what I want to say. All I can think about is the way you make me feel. I never thought I would experience true love.
When you told me the story of your accident, for the first time I felt I was a part of your past. You have never been alone Graham. Even before I met you I knew you. I knew we were looking for each other. I knew we would love each other more than anything or anyone has ever loved
before. It has kept me alive on several occasions. It kept you alive in the hospital. Thank you, Graham Ros Welch, for living for me. Thank you for your tireless efforts to find me.
Now it’s time to think about our life together. I promise I will do everything in my power to give you children. I want to see the proud, loving father I know you can be. I want them to have your determination, ambition, courage, strength, and pride. I want them to be tall and
handsome like you. I love you Graham.
I’m so proud you choose me over every other woman in the country. I am deeply honored. I hope I can be everything you want. I haven’t always been the woman I am now. I am working hard to improve myself everyday. I promise you I will always be a good woman, friend, companion, lover,
and wife for you. You deserve the very best.
All my love, Leslie Franklin
Today, I know that many will say I will be there at any time that I need you but that few are there when you respond to the call~~~ Simone
Thanks Logan for the wise thought you have given. i try to live my life by following this: always treat others like how you would like to treat them." well, i have not always been appreciated for doing so and to be truthful that does hurt sometimes. but i have learned to
continue living so, and i am at peace. Maple.
Hey Paul, I understand about u not wanting trouble. If both of u really care for each other u definitely can make it happen no matter what obstacles you face. Her dad seems to be a simple trouble. read this months Reader's Digest to find out how love overcomes some truly
hard obstacles. my heart goes out to you, and i do hope u find the strength to stand up to everyone who disapproves. good luck. Maple.
LASK---today I will try to complete my work in a more professional manner. I will try to make fewer mistakes and try to include all the needed elements in each narrataive.
It is only four days until Christmas 2001. I will look back on this year as one of the most darkest and sadest years of my life. I lost two very precious babies during pregnancy within six months of each other this year. Before this experience I lived life without the
knowledge or guidance of of Spirit. It has only been thru the pain of this year that I have discovered and nurtured my Spirit, and the very essence of myself. I am beginning again, my life on different path. I would like to publicly thank my two precious babies, whom I did not get to hold, whom I
did not get to name, but within me, living in my soul and my heart, those two little babies, will grow, along with me, in the future years of my life. Merry Christmas.
The Ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of confort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Chao
Our pains will take us farther than we could ever imagine. It just depends on whether we choose to give up or make the most of the situation. Making the most of the situation has brought me from being a strung out heroin addict of 7 years with no self love to a caring,
spiritual, giving woman who values life and love today. Everything happens for some reason. When we lose people in our lives, it is really about us not the ones who have passed. They are just fine...looking down on us hoping we can find the peace inside of us that they now have. I just needed to
share that....I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday! -Kristen
If God be your partner, make your plans large Happy Holidays to all Chao
" Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness." - W.N. Murray
I want so much to be free of religious fundamentalism, but have struggled with it for years. I'm making great strides by finding sites like "soulful living" but it's a constant struggle. I did not realize how like a drug religion can be. Please send healing thoughts my way
if you think of it. :-)
:) Healing thoughts are sent your way: I understand fully what the journey your travel is leading you through... Simone
To Chao: To contemplate upon the words of Martin Luther King is to show your commitment to humankind... May love always enter your heart and honor fulfill your living~~~ Simone.
To Chao: may your days be fulfilled with honor, love, peace and fulfillment ~~~ Simone
Merry Christmas to all. It was my first Christmas with my parents seperated. It wasn't easy but i got through it one of my sisters visited him with me, but the other two would not. I can't believe how things have changed since last year. I felt better after i seen my dad but
i sure want him to come back. I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas. Love, Beth
Thank you Simone hoe have you been? May your day also be fild with love a peace. And to :) Life is really a spiritual unfolding that no science or philosophy or religion has yet fully clarified. PEACE TO ALL Chao
I had a good day today. Although the holidays are over i am looking forward to my sisters wedding. My sister is getting married in a week from saturday. This is going to be a little hard on me since i have never lived without her. She is only twenty one and she will be
moving to Texas as soon as she is married. It will only be me, my mom, and my little sister at home. What a change. Hope everyone is having a good day. Beth
It has been a few months since I have visited this site, and it has brought a smile to my face by reading all of your entries. Kristen, you are such a strong person and even though I do not know you, I feel so proud of you. Keep up the faith...living a drug-free life will
keep you happy and strong. I'll say a prayer for you today and I'll keep you in my thoughts. I unfortunately lost a good friend to a drug addiction and I am familiar with your pain. God bless you. And Paul, please don't let the parents of the woman you love ruin your relationship. There is an age
difference, but you are both adults. If you feel that she is the one for you, then stay strong and try your hardest to make things work out. True love is sometimes hard to find these days, so if you find it keep it. And violence is never the answer. Hopefully her father will realize this and one day
you can all be friendly. Beth, I am sorry to hear about your parents separation. I have many friends who have had to go through this also and in time their hearts healed as I'm sure yours will also. Be fair to both of them...I'm sure they both still love you very much. And also try to stay storong
with your sister leaving you. My sister left for school a few years ago, and it was not easy for me. But in certain ways we have become closer because we appreciate those times spent together now. Sometimes change in life can be a good thing. It helps you to grow. I hope everyone has a blessed day
and a nice holiday weekend. Take care. lynn
My thoughts, my mind, my tears, my love, my father is gone, but he lives on in my mind. I hope that the image that is now engraved in my mind of my father fades quickly and that the old images of dad will be forever etched in the spot where the current picture is. I feel a
sense of oneness with him. Since December 2000, I have watched my father slowly die. He was a proud and tough Marine. He was stoic. He was my hero. We had time to really talk about his fears and what bothered him. I know that he was afraid of dying because when I asked him what bothered him the most
about death he said, "Never getting to see you again." I was by his bedside everyday. I rubbed his neck, chest, arms, legs and shoulders. December 22nd, I put on his favorite c.d. and hooked up the headphones so that he could relax. I always held his hand. When he could, he would let me lay on the
bed beside him. That is when I felt the most comfortable. I think papa really enjoyed that as much as I did. My soul touched my father's soul. The morning of December 23rd came and awoke me at 5:17 a.m. Mom said that she spoke with him and straightened out his body after he took his final breath. I
know that dad came to me and said goodbye then. I felt it that morning and I still feel him to this day. Yes, that was my father, coming to kiss his "sugar" goodbye.
Lori "Base" Weaver
Lynn...thank you for your kind words, they are very much appreciated. I can feel things that happen in life today. I was phoned by my mother the other day telling me my grandmother is dying. She is 84 yrs. old, in a nursing home and was weak, but the news of her now dying
took us all by surprize since just 2 weeks ago she was ok and now she has kidney failure. I feel for my mom since it is her mother and when I spoke to my mom last night all I could do was ask my mom how she was and tell her how sorry I was that she is going through this. I know it must hurt so much.
I did not cry while on the phone with my mother, instead I shared my beliefs of what death is...a passing of our souls to Home. While alone I cried and I am ok with feeling my emotions...drug free, when 15 months ago I was too numb or would say "poor me". I pray my grandmother will go in peace and I
know I will see her again someday. Kristen
What is the meaning of life? Life has no meaning, other than what you give to it. -Allie
Today, I am so grateful to be alive. I to a chance to live my dream of relocating to another state. My spirit supported me through this process. It knew the right path for me. I am thankful that I listened and responded to calling. You never know what you can accomplish
until you try. My thought for today. REACH FOR THE STARS AND FOLLOW YOUR HEART
My gram passed on last night. I'm sure she received the warm welcome Home she deserved! She will be very missed here though....Kristen
Such a DELIGHTFUL time of the year & a MOST beautiful site to share these thoughts......thanks to those who had a hand in making this site possible for all of us to come and enjoy and continue our soulful growth in our life journey. Praises Be !!
Love & Blessings, Sherry
I can't believe I'm doing this, but here goes... A little over six years ago I left my husband and our three children stayed with him. The older two were in their teens and the youngest one was 11. It was a difficult decision at the time, I prayed and prayed and understood
at the time through prayer that it was the best decision for the highest good of everyone concerned. I had already begun my spiritual journey of learning, discovery, healing... This was met with criticism, judgement and put downs. I wasn't strong enough to deal with it. I couldn't imagine living the
rest of my life with someone who didn't understand me and made fun of what was sacred to me.
I have missed the children terribly. It seems to have gotten worse recently. I feel bad about not being there for them. My daughter and I have a good relationship as well as my younger son. The middle one was very angry and hurt. I miss the broken dreams we had for the future. My
husband has found someone else and is quite happy. I am pressently with someone but it's not quite the same. I feel like everything I ever dreamed of as a young person is gone. There is no real stability or sense of "family". I miss that terribly. Although I do trust in divine order and that all
happens as it needs to...there is such an ache in my heart. Tears...again... Grace
Dear Grace, My heart goes out to you. My life certainly has not turned out as the "fairy tale" I imagined and hoped for when I was younger. My life is far from what I imagined... A wonderful husband and family... living a wonderful life. I'm in my late 30's. Still have not
met Mr. Right. And, am no where close to having the family of my dreams. I pray that my dreams may still come true before it is too late to have children. But, what I've learned from the experience... is that life is what we make it, each and every day. Even if it is not the life we "dreamed" it
would be. It is the life we have created and chosen... for a reason... because it is right for us, in the here and now. I am happy with my decisions, and would not want to change the way my life has turned out. I am quite happy and satisfied... living from my heart, in a way that is right for me, in
the moment. I know God has a plan for me, and I am living my life in a way that is right for me. I trust and have faith.
God bless, MM
I awoke today with this phrase in mind today, "A necklace of nice moments" isn't that a beautiful phrase? I have no idea where it came from. Maybe I made it up, but either way, its beautiful.
I choose to live by choice-not chance to make changes-not excuses to be motivated-not manipulated to be useful-not used to excel-not compete I choose self-esteem--not self-pity I choose to listen to the inner voice--not the random opinion of others
I chose this as my statement of life after the last time I attempted to kill myself with an overdose and had to have my stomach pumped again. I have chozen to live -----by choice*not chance Simone Parkinson (Canada)
I thank you for your very kind words. I was hoping someone would reach out with some words of wisdom or inspiration.
I have also learned that sometimes what we think, desire or dream we want really isn't the same when it happens. I thought I used to believe there is a Mr. Right...now I'm not so sure. The times on my own were of a very different nature.
I second guess my choices constantly and carry around a tremendous amount of guilt and doubt over the choices I have made. If they were right wouldn't things seem and feel better. Starting life over at my age often seems an undaunting task.
Oh how I dislike sounding so negative! Many people have it so much worse. If I could only shift the perceptions, beliefs and judgements that seem to overpower and overwhelm me. True ineer peace and happiness seem so far away.
Being connected to my inner guidance voice would surely help but I seem to be afraid to go within for fear of hearing what a failure and loser I think I have been. I'm thankful for the blessing of a few close friends that remind me that this is not the truth.
I'm thankful for any and all words of inspiration as I work at rediscovering and reconnecting with my true inner self.
Thank you, Grace
A pre-snow day in the Northeast. I am looking forward to waking up to a beautiful blanket of fresh snow, I work from home, live on a lake and enjoy the coziness of working and looking out at the beauty of a freshly fallen snow. I feel comfort to be in my little cottage, very
protected and safe. A great feeling..
well my sister got married last night. I can't believe it. i am going to miss her so much. this is the first time she will be away, plus she is moving to texas. the wedding was very fun and i think she is very happy. my parents did not talk much at the wedding but it was
more than i have seen them talk before. it was a little emotional for me and my sisters to see our sister get married, but i am very happy for her. have a good day. beth
A beautiful day in the Northeast. The blanket of freshly fallen snow has indeed arrived. I feel light, cozy and in tune with the universe this morning. A gently hush of quiet accompanies me this morning as I gaze out onto a beautiful lake from my office window. I am blessed
for the day.
Life is good ,Life is great when god gives you grace. Happy is the man whom god is the Lord always rejoicing even when times are hard I know the Lord he heard my cry he come to help and carry me on.I cannot make it alone I need God help to carry me on. The Lord is my helper,
my hopes and my shield the love he give is always so near so i keep it real with the lord at my rear.so i stay clear of what i can see because i know my lord watches over me.Life is Good because Jesus Love me. Peace rosa
Grace, It is never too late to start over and reinvent ourselves. Follow your heart and listen to your soul. You have the answers within you. Be guided by spirit always and live in joy. May the peace and light of the Divine be with you always. Blessings, MM
When I do things that deep in my heart I know to be wrong, I now notice that my heart soon fills with pain and sadness and a terrible emptyness. I feel so lost and alone. I have recently noticed that if I sincerly pray that God help remove the pain and I do not do the same
wrong things, then soon my heart is filled with happiness. I have never considered it could be so simple. Is it just coincedence? Is it really God trying to show me the way? I want to believe so much.... so much.
Chris, God is showing you the way. It is not coincidence. God has blessed us all with the instinct of knowing what is wrong and right. That is why we feel the way we do when we do things - either good or bad. When we do something wrong or hurt someone, we feel their pain. We
we extend our hands out to those who need help, we feel their thankfulness. It is a blessing that has been given to us that many people do not realize. Truly pray to God with all of your heart and promise to change or to try your best to change, and He will answer your prayers. Their is something
awesome and powerful beyond this world as we know it and we refer to that awesome presence as God. I believe that if people would just take 5 minutes out of each day to thank God and realize our blessings, then they will be so much happier. By thanking him and praying for others also, God feels
happy and we in return feel his happiness. It truly will make a difference in our lives as well as others. I just wanted to share some of my feelings. I hope everyone is having a wonderful day. -lynn
Have you ever been at a crossroads in your life. A place where your just not sure of "where do I go from here?" I found this site today on my on-going quest to discover my purpose at this time in my life. I really like this page. A place to express yourself with no judgments
placed on you. Up to this point in my life, I have felt a sense of direction. But now, I feel.....like I don't know who I am. I love my Lord, I love my husband and my children, and I love my work. But I stll feel something missing. Is this normal for a 36 year old woman??? My kids are becoming more
independent and so I now have more time to pursue...something. I just wish I could put my finger on what that something is. Does anyone have any suggestions?
To the person above,
What is in your heart to give to the world? Perhaps you would find fulfillment through giving to your community by volunteering, or perhaps you are an artist, with untapped talents.... Maybe there is great art waiting to be created with your hands...
Good luck. I hope you find what is missing.
show you're soul, be who you are, let others talk amongst themselves
flowing in soul, found upon arrival, we will emerge at heaven's gate and fly as angels embrace us and move us upon the wings of sprit
hold on and then let go, no one flies without breaking away
our fate can not claim us, if we are not open to our destiny
everyday i wake up and thank the Creator for my life! i have come a long way in the realization of my self worth and the worth of others around me. i am not alone...no one has to walk this earth alone. as long as i have faith that i am a child of God....i am never alone in
mind, body, and soul! maria
I've finished my resume (finally). I'm good at what I do but it's so boring to me now, and I want to do something new and something I really enjoy. Problem is, I don't know what that is. I prayed one night last week for God to just make these choices for me because I am
confused about what I want to do and the confusion is torture. The next day my boss called me in his office and offered me the job I've wanted for years and will give me full freedom to do it the way I want. It's not the end-all solution but it's a chance to explore an area I do like and it will
improve my resume and my paycheck for the time being until I find what I really want.
I hurt for the hurt, who hurt for the dead, I hurt for the dead who died this sad day, I would Die for the dead so the hurt would be gone, Tears would fade, And lives would move on, But whats done is done. what else can we say?. We will never forget you, and someone WILL
Another beautiful day in the Northeast. It is clear, sunny and cold. A brisk Winter day is invigorating to me. I feel grounded, and feel like I am wrapped in a cocoon of light and love. I am working from home, looking out over a beautiful frozen lake, I hear birds chirping,
and have my dog and cat by my feet as I move through the day. I am blessed and am in the moment. Hope all who are reading this are as content as I am, or get the feeling of contentment when reading this post.
We do not have all the answers. Perhaps prayer is simply a time we set aside to acknowledge that reality. Mary E. Hunt
God give me patience with the ignorant people nextdoor and with my new classes. Give me luck at bingo tomorrow so I can treat my friend. Thankyou for all you have given me thus far in my life.
Ever have one of those days when you need to hold on to the steering wheel real tight? I feel I am in for a rough ride, and am afraid, yet know that I have to get through a difficult day. As I write these words, I submit my angst and worry onto the printed page and away from
my being. I am much more than my body, I need to remember this as I encounter my current hardships. Can anyone relate?
Prayer is conversation with God, and God is always there. Chao
i just found this website and really enjoy it so far i am a mom of 3, i stay home with my 2yr. old.i a 36 and when i turned 35 i realized something is missing from my life. i am not a peaceful person inside, my mind is always going, i've tried meditation but i really have
trouble quitening my mind. i stay worried, anxious, we are a one income family with 3 kids who always need something. i am so glad to find this site i really hope it can help me. i need to rediscover myself, find who i am besides, mom and wife. i am serching for inner peace. thank you for sites like
this where i can say howi feel to someone besides my husband and family who dont understand me. my home life is great its just something in me that seem unbalanced . your site will be a great help to me. thank you! carol
+ + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + to all of you souls who share that you are so lonely and you dont know if you want to go on. this i say to you. you are special, God put you here for a purpose you have something special for this journey of your life, dont
give up! someone out there needs something that you have to offer. talk to God, talk to yourself, really listen to something that whispers to you that is your inner voice that is God. its not time for you to leave this world yet you have so much to learn and to teach someone. SOMEONE NEEDS YOU
your friend who cares, carol******
dear crossroads, i too am a 36 yr. old and feel that something is missing. i think that i have forgotten to take care of myself. my kids are 15,11,and 2. 2 years ago my life went into a whirlwind, i thought i wasthrough having kids, but i was wrong. i'm going through teenage
problems, puberty problems and terrible twos problems. my new year resulution is to take care of me! i just have to get it together. i am glad that i am not the only one going through this! carol,
Crossroads almost seems a way of living these days. I feel like I have been at crossroads for almost ten years. That's a very, very long time. There have been momentary glimpses of peace and happiness, but none that truly last. We make choices and decisions each and every
day which impact not only that moment but often the years that come after that.
Although it is often very difficult and challenging, we are never really alone. It is our humanity that makes us feel that way. Taught that we are separate, taught that we are different. From reading the many entries before this, one can't help but recognize the similarities
between us. The circumstances similar perhaps, but the effects on our inner spirit nontheless the same.
A mother of three myself, they are now 23, 21 and 17, I have also felt overwhelmed, not understood, unappreciated and very lonely. How do we seem to get to this point when our hopes and dreams were so different from our reality...? For some, this is not a real problem...for myself
and others, there is a sense of failure in being all that I wanted to be and ultimately how things ended up to be. Healing and forgiveness with love are really the best tools we have. As we heal and forgive ourselves and others we become renewed.
I am grateful that there are others out there willing to listen and understand when others won't or can't. Being listened to with understanding and not judgement is so important. Thank you for listening. May your day be showered with blessings and a touch of God's love in some
jan.2002 you are right Grace, by the way what a great name.i think we are mourning for the woman we were suppose to be, the woman we wanted to be,the wife we dreamed of being and the parent we wanted to be. it's that way for me. i find myself annoyed and irritable all of the
time. the people i love the most gets all of my bad moods, and they do not deserve this. i just get so uptight over everything. i know that what you think and say affects the way you feel, but it's so hard to get rid of all of the negative junk going on in your head and heart. i read books about not
sweating the small stuff, and how to bring joy and a peaceful inner feelings into your life, but it's so hard to remember what you read when the kids are trying to kill each other and your anxious and worried all the way to the mailbox, thinking what bill am i going to get today that i cant pay. why
is worry always in me? i am not as bad as i use to be, but at times it still controls me. i dont wish for a new car or a new house, my heart longs for quiet, and serenity. calmness and a peaceful spirit, and grace. i want to live the life God intended me to live, and be a gentle loving person, but
it is so hard to try to do this buried under piles of dirty clothes, and dishes, and unpaid bills.my house is cluttered, my mind and spirit are cluttered. it is so hard to clean up you body,mind, and spirit, when you can't even get your house cleaned. i feel so scattered. thanks for listenig to all
of my complaining. its so nice to have someone listen to me. carol
To Carol and Grace I will recommand a book that has been very helpful to me THE POWER OF NOW by Eckhart Tolle. Good luck Chao
Oh finally relief, i just got done taking my last two finals of this semester. Now i can do what i want instead of study for awhile. My finals were pretty tough. one took two hours. I haven't been to the site for awhile i hope everyone is doing good. I have been feeling
pretty good it has been a week since my sister has left, but to tell you the truth, i am so busy with scool i don't have time to notice, but i do miss her. I hope everyone has a good day. Beth
Chao...thank you for the book title, I will look it up. I so look forward to words of wisdom and inspiration on this site. It's like finding a new friend. We are all on this incredible journey individually and also collectively. That's how we are able to relate to one
another and have compassion in times of challenge and struggle.
Carol...boy could I relate with the things you wrote about. You are definitely right on when you talk of mourning all the things we wanted to be, hoped to be and eventually became. It's kind of scary and overwhelming on some days. I truly remembered days when I thought I was
going to lose it with all that was happening. It's virtually impossible to meet everyone's needs and the many responsibilities and obligations we think we have.
The difference for me is that I am no longer in the family home. This in itself presents a host of challenges and a new set of brokendreams. One would think that it would be different, but the challenges and life's lessons just go with us...afterall they are, our lessons.
A friend once said to me..."the most important thing to remember is to just BE, not DO". I know when I take the time to just "be" things feel different. Afterall we are human beings not human doings. It has always helped renew my spirit by connecting with nature in some small way
like watching the sunrise or sunset streaming through the clouds, noticing the beauty of creation all around me, taking a gentle breeze at is filters through my hair, watching the rustling of the leavs in the trees... All these nourish my spirit and in that moment all else isn't very important.
Nourished and strengthened it is easier to face the things in your day that need to be done or dealt with.
Let's try and do one little thing each day that fits with the image of who we want to be and know we are becoming!
The little things we do can mean so much. So take the time today, or tomorrow, and do something little for someone, with no expectation of a return. See how it will make the person feel and yourself too!
I went to my mom's Sat. for a family get together. It was so nice to spend time with my 5 year old nephew, my 3 yr old niece and my 7 month old nephew. It is almost like I am getting to know them for myself for the first time. Up until 16 months ago, I was lost in heroin
addiction for 7 years. Of corse I would see them at get togethers and hear about them all of the time but it was like a dream. All I could devote any time or effort into was my addiction. I am so thankful to be clean and in recovery today. My sister told me that before they came over, she explained
to my 5 yr. old nephew Sean that he would be seeing Auntie Kristen that day. To my amazement, he replied to her "oh good, I love Auntie Kristen!" It is such a wonderful example of unconditional love that I just smiled and then cried. Life really is good! -Kristen
Thank you Grace, for your wisdom. sometimes it feels like i am the only one with troubles. i have noticed lately that i have a yearning for nature. i have found myself trying to bring nature into my house and my crafting. i have become obsesed with gardening and decorating
with nature, when i work in my garden i seem to forget my problems for awhile and concentrate on my plants. i am amazed sometimes that i can put a tiny seed into the dirt and something grows, it can become a beautiful flower or even food to nourish my body. Thank you for reminding me of this special
place that i can escape to for a little while. God Bless you! carol
Carol...it isn't really that nature is there as an escape as much as it is to nourish the spirit. If you practice emptying your mind of thoughts and chatter you may be surprised with what your inner voice and spiritual guidance have to share with you. The wonders of, and in
nature are boundless and without limitation, just as we are. Just connecting with that feeling in the heart area of the body is incredibly powerful and very healing. See if you can connect with that in even a small way. This opens you up to be a vessel of divine and universal love. Even a brief
moment is a beginning and something you can look forward to. Hope this is helpful. Grace
Beautiful words I came across today and share because we need to be reminded.
You do not have to go through pain and struggle to grow.
POSITIVE AFFIRMATION: I AM growing and changing easily at my perfect pace.
POSITIVE VISUALIZATION: I close my eyes and imagine that every aspect of myself is evolving into a more perfect form. I open my heart to accept the healing I need and trust I will easily receive it at the perfect time for me. I see myself as a whole healthy person enjoying my life
completely. I combine these thoughts with a feeling of joy and I let the images go.
Thoughts on choosing the moment. A good analogy for me to understand it is when I am in a hurry and traffic is fierce. I tell myself to relax and slow down. I'll get there eventually. Rushing through only causes more problems and an accident could make me permanently late.
So how do I apply this technique to the rest of my life? In the last four weeks my whole life has taken a tumble. I filed a report with DSS on behalf of my babysitter, so her stepfather filed on for me as payback. Since my babysitter was no longer working for me, I left my kids
napping while I got my older son from the bus stop. Now I am a neglectful mother and have to go through an assessment with a social worker.
The house we are renting (we found it by sheer luck) is up for sale. We have to be able to buy the house by April 30th or move. We had just gotten the kids settled after a cross-country move last year because my husband's company went out of business and he could only find work in
Two days ago I threw my back out. Today my husband broke his leg, which will make commuting to his job impossible. We have four children, ages 6, 4, 3 and 2. The six year old is in Kindergarten full time and the 4 and 3 year old attend Montessori school part time.
So, if I choose all this then the universe will work with me and not against me? If I slow down, maybe I will realize I will get there eventually. Where is there? Maybe my problem is that I don't have a goal in mind. I guess I just thought there was a place that was a little less
It's hard to choose all this when I consider the amount of suffering the entire family is going through as a result of these occurrences. And if we have to move again... It's really hard to see your kids in pain. I know the only way out is through, but I don't know how I can get us
My there is this: family, home, stability, self-confidence, joy and peace. Not every second. No hard and fast rules. Just something intangible that let's me know that all is well. Yet I watch the news and all is not well. I asked my two year old "Where is God when it hurts?" (I'm
reading the book), he answered quite wisely, "in heaven."
Oh God, You are here. Oh God, I am here. I know this because I know that if I am still here and I am, it is only because You are here too and first and always. Thank You for carrying me again yet another day.
i am so sorry all of this is happening to you. you need to say to yourself over and over (they say that to really understand and start believing something you should say it 21 times.) say to yourself " This too shall pass." carol
To the person who has so many challenges in her life... We have all been there at one time or another. Some of the challenges and struggles I have faced in the past 8 years are...well... overwhelming to say the least. When we are in the midst of these challenges and
difficult times, is when we seem to forget about the light...our trust...our faith...our belief. "Where is it?", we ask. When we have made it through, we invariably see how we have been blessed. Some times it may be years before we are able to see how our circumstances enriched ans what we learned
as a result. We truly are never given more than we can handle (although I've been known to question and challenge that many, many times!!). Our growth and healing does come in divine order. We experience exactly what we and so does each member of our family for our and their individual soul growth
and healing. If you can hold onto that with trust it may help you a little. We truly are not victims of life, we aare participants. maybe if you can figure out what some of it is about, you may be able to move through it with less trauma. Grace
I was born angry, resistant to life and I can see this in photos of my childhood. I just always knew there was more to life than what adults and the other kids were telling. I studied religions of the world and subconsciously began to erect my own theories. But it was all
bunk. Bunk with a few nuggets of truth. I discovered I had an affinity for the truth while my ego had an affinity for the sleek, dressed up lies about what was important. Well all this was taking me a long time and happened over a period of 30+ years. Though I was anxious to know my spiritual truth,
I wasn't in a panic to know it until after I was diagnosed with Hepatitis C in 1989 while living in England where they told me they knew very little about the disease but figured I had 6 months to live. Then, I paniced.I scurried to remember the pearls of wisdom of all the religions I had studied
hoping they would fill pieces of a puzzle still undone that would at last show me the true big picture. I didn't want to die without knowing. At the same time I was seeking there was a lot of medical intervention; a 10 yr old daughter who was afraid of death and who went into depression; so it was a
difficult time to continue my search with all that going on. When I resumed my search, I looked to my childhood religion of Christianity but also to Hinduism and Zen Buddhism. Everywhere I looked I found a grain of truth but not enough. I tried to understand the Bible but there were as many
interpretations as there are people. Meanwhile, I learned to live with Hep C and pain. Then in 1999 I got breast cancer and though that humbled me, I could hear or sense that the Universe was trying to talk to me. I listened intently but my ego always got in the way. I had ESP since early childhood
but I wasn't getting anything there either.My pain-body was growing heavy with the burden to know. Two weeks ago, in a support group, a member told about Eckher Tolle's book "The Power Of NOW" and the next day I got the book. It was all I had been looking for--all the answers I hadn't understood in
the Bible. Suddenly I awakened, reading the book night and day, slowly, over and over again pinching myself to make sure I was alive. I never felt more alive. I knew all he said about the past and current culture shapes our ego nature as true. That there is nothing but the moment. The psychic pain I
felt subsided and the physical pain, though a challenge, is manageable through breath work and the knowing he describes happens when you fully experience the NOW moment. So here I am covered with a itching, painful rash over my body (not the way I envisioned myself at the moment I knew the truth
about existance, but here it is. I can't sleep and decided to get onto the website and write about it. I am writing struggling to overcome the sleeping pill I took to get past the pain - but didn't work once I discovered for myself the knowledge Mr. Tolle shared. I don't know where I tomorrow is
going and I don't care. I have the NOW every moment and that is where I'll be. Well, thanks for being there for me to share with! Judy
The biggest thing I want to do: I want to learn how to bring God into my life and to let Him teach me how to handle life. I don't know how and it's kind of scary. I've been through hell in the past and some in the present and I don't know how to cope anymore. I am new to
this so I'm not sure what to say. Please bear with me. ~MP
The biggest thing I want to do: I want to learn how to bring God into my life and to let Him teach me how to handle life. I don't know how and it's kind of scary. I've been through hell in the past and some in the present and I don't know how to cope anymore. I am new to
this so I'm not sure what to say. Please bear with me. ~MP
So sorry for the multiple entries---don't know what I did!! MP
Only A Minute (For My Dad) There are times I miss you dearly the years and tears still flow I wonder if you can see me do you surround me here below There's nothing that I wouldn't give to see you and to say I really, truly love you Dad and miss you more each day I would
only need a minute to say what I want to say I would wrap my arms around you and beg God to let you stay Today, I sit, remembering you so and the pain cuts like a knife Wishing you were here with me to help me walk through life If I only had a minute here's what I would say, I miss you more than
ever Dad and I'll see you again...someday ~Michelle Flick-Phillips copyright 2001
PM You can start with prayer it's nothing more then conversation with God. And try sitting sill for a few minuts evry day. and anothe good thing to do is keep a jurnal. You may want to read Conversation With God by Neale Donald Walsch
"If God is your target, you're in lick, because God is so big, you can't miss. By Neale Donald Walsch
i am so excited today. my husband and i are getting to go out alone tonight. it has been soooo long, we usually ( actually i ) have a kid with us all the time. i miss being alone with my husband, i miss him when he is at work , and when he gets home one of the kids need
always needs something. my car is broke right now, so i amstuck at home allday with my 2 yr. old, and at 4:30 a tornado hits this house everyone arrives at the same time always needing something. i would so enjoy a weekend away with him, he works so hard to take care of us, and i work to take care
of everyone. but tonite we are alone and i am so grateful. carol
How fortunate you are Carol to be blessed with this special time together. May it be everything you would want it to be. Love needs special time for expression, nurturing and sharing. Grace
You are right on target Chao!!!! when you say..... "If God is your target; how can you lose?" My dear community always remember that we are not perfect, but if 95% of our achievements and goals are with a God-will in mind; He/She will never let us down!!!!!!!!! I pray
blessings upon all!!! ~~~ Simone
I've discovered that when we don't touch God daily, worship Him in love, tell Him with words how much we truly love Him and speak fondly of Him we begin to take Him for granted. We expect things from him and can even build resentment towards Him. Then the spriral downward
takes hold and we begin to think and feel negatively torwards everything and everyone in life. So, lets start anew today and Fall in Love with GOD.
I found out I was approved for a 5,000 grant to get me started with my own apartment again. I am so grateful! Because of my heroin addiction, It has been years since I had my own apartment. I was always staying with people who were not always safe to be around who also used
drugs. I have been clean and in programs for 16 months now and I am ready to move on. They say in the fellowship that blessings will come, sometimes quickly and sometimes slowly but they will come, in God's time. Well, I guess it is time and I am really happy about this!!! -Kristen
good for you Kristen. i have read some of your thoughts and you have been through a lot! you seem to be a really strong person. keep the faith and be grateful for the lessons you have learned. thank you Grace for the kind words, i am so grateful for the time with my husband.
i have read some of the thoughts posted on this site from women who are waiting for their special someone to love, and others that their husbands are mean to them and i am so grateful for what ihave
This day is yours to make your dreams come true...to make new wishes and create new possibilities. Just believe in yourself and go for it! Grace
The way each day will look to you all starts with who you're looking to. Chao
Chao, I purchased the book "THE POWER OF NOW" by Eckhart Tolle which you recommended. I have just stareted it. It was an adventure just finding it. It as the only copy left in the bookstore. Will have to let you know in a little while what I think.
Another excellent book I have recently read is "The Power of Love" by don Miguel Ruiz. I couldn't put it down. It is based on ancient Toltec teachings and is VERY good. My friend read it in two days.
In this moment I am inspired by this sight and my heart is open. If you are reading these words, open your heart and share the gift of love...given freely and without any conditons. Grace
take a moment. breathe. notice yourself existing exactly where you are. you are alive; let me repeat, you are alive. that is a miracle. do not forget. ~eli
Grace, I am glad that you found The Power of Now it will take you on an even grander adventure reading it. I was supperssed to here that don Miguel Ruiz had a new book he is one of my favorite tachers I have read all his books Beyond Fear, The Foue agreements. the Mastery of
Love and now I look forward to reading the Power of Love thank you for shering it. This one is for you Grace The first duty of love is to listen. Chao
Chao, I sincerely apologize. Iquoted the wrong title of don Miguel's book. It is "The Mastery of Love". When I bought "The Power of Now", I also picked up "Beyond Fear". The Four Agreements also has a companion book which is very good. I get a newslwtter in the mail from
Sixth Sun which is written by don Miguel. I think I initially found it on the Internet. I have many favourite spiritual sites that nourish my spirit with inspiration. Reaching out and connecting with kindred spirits is such a blessing. Grace
Achieving starts with believing.
"No one Saves us but ourselves, No one can and no one may. Others can point us to The Path, But we ourselves must Walk The Way." Bhagavad Gita
feb.2002 i am a peaceful person, i will live in peace, i will seek peace, i will spread peace. i am a peaceful woman, mother, wife,daughter, friend. i am a peaceful person. goodbye negative talk and thoughts, today you will not be in me. i have peace in me. welcome i have
been waitng. carol~ ~
No need to apologize Grace, I do that all the time :) The person who makes no mistakes does not normally make anything. Chao
I haven't written for a while, and i miss it. but everything is going well. I just went for a long walk with my mom and we had a great talk. She is really doing alot better. I like to see her happy. My sister and i had a good talk last weekend and we are getting along
better. I have been very busy latley so i haven't been able to talk to my sister in Texas. I hope everyone is doing well. Beth
Jeus is the true victor, forever in control. In every situation share the love that you experience someone. Take time out from youtr busy life just to listen-to whisper a prayer
I know I am out of touch with my soul and I know it is there and waiting to be touched, felt, and nutured and myself along with it. I need to feel the wind again, I need to feel something but the pavement again, i need to hear my own thoughts again and cleanse my mind of all
that cannot be changed. I do not need to feel badly anymore or do i need to apologize to myself. I have lived and made bad choices. I think alot of bad ones. Probably more than good. But it is up to me to redefine myself so that I feel closer to my real feelings so that I can share and be closer to
others and explore myself through them.
Joanne was my neighbor for almost a year in the sober house I live in. Joanne is an alcoholic, middle aged woman who was very lonely. She received her 2 yr. coin in sobriety about a month or so ago. She decided she would move from the sober house and get her own
apartment...she said she was ready. A week after she left, she went back to drinking. After that, she lost her job and then just last week she was found dead in her apartment due to drinking too much. I feel a sadness when I think about it, even though I am sure she is ok and especially since now
she is free from her disease. She had a lot of living left though...it is a shame she did not get to see that. I will be moving out soon also....I KNOW I have alot of good living ahead of me and I will do my best to make the most out of it. Kristen
Kristen, it is understandable that you might feel that way. I have learned, from a spiritual perspective, that when we feel sorry we are truly not helping anyone (no matter what their circumstance) we are actually contributing to their problem by adding to it. When we trust
that there is a divine order to the universe and in all things, it is easier to have compassion for the choices we and others make. The best thing that you can do for Joanne is to ask that she be helped. In this way our spiritual family and teachers on the other side will be able to help her at soul
level. This would be a loving thing to do. Hope you understand what I am trying to share with you. It is very freeing when we work at understanding and healing our own weaknesses. HELP IS ALWAYS THERE! Love and light, Grace
Well, as I heal from this jouney of an illness, I have discovered my true self. I have disoovered to know what a "code of honor" feels like and what a wonderful world this is with guidance at every turn. I have become someone who knows the importance of the "will" because I
know I have an extremely creative potential in this world
A PRAYER REQUEST: I AM A 24 YEAR OLD STAY AT HOME MOTHER OF A 2 1/2 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER AND WIFE TO A GREAT HUSBAND SINCE 1999. AS A CHILD, MY MOTHER ABANDONED ME AT THE AGE OF 4 1/2. THE ONLY THING I WANT TO ACCOMPLISH IN MY LIFE IS TO BE A GREAT WIFE AND MOTHER SO I CAN GIVE
TO MY FAMILY WHAT I NEVER RECEIVED AS A CHILD.
THE DOCTOR FOUND A SUSPICIOUS MOLE THAT CHANGED COLOR AND SHAPE AND SO HE WANTED TO REMOVE IT. THE REMOVAL HAPPENED YESTERDAY AFTERNOON AND IT SEEMS THERE WAS MORE GOING ON UNDER THE SKIN THAN HE ANTICIPATED. NOW I SIT HER WITH 5 STICHES ON MY BACK, WAITING THE WEEK TO DISCOVER IF
THIS WILL BE CANCEROUS OR NOT. I AM SCARED AND PRAY THAT THIS WILL PASS WITHOUT DRAMA OR ILLNESS. NOT MY WILL, BUT GOD'S WILL.
THESE ARE THE TIMES THAT I FEEL THE LOSS OF NOT HAVING A MOTHER TO TURN TO THE MOST. PLEASE THANK GOD FOR YOUR MOTHER OR CHILD AND THANK GOD FOR THE GIFT OF HEALTH AND TIME TO SPEND WITH THOSE YOU LOVE.
PLEASE SAY A PRAYER THAT ALL WILL BE ALL RIGHT AND MY HUSBAND WILL NOT HAVE TO BECOME A WIDOWER AND THAT MY DAUGHTER WILL NOT HAVE TO BE ABANDONED LIKE I WAS. PLEASE PRAY THAT MY HEALTH WILL REMAIN SOLID, BECAUSE FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE - I AM NEEDED.
THANK YOU AND GOD BLESS! -t.d. 02/07/02
I think there is a lot of emotional and spiritual healing happening in Cape Town (the word spiritual comes from 'Spirare' which means to 'breathe' or 'respire'). I think we're all beginning to find our way back to ourSelves, back to being able to "breathe" again - making
shifts back to that point where WE are the cause and LIFE is the effect. And that cause is ALWAYS mental. ALWAYS.
Why am I speaking about this? I guess that for me I LOVE being at these parties (only been to 3 or 4!) because the energy, the experience of co-operation and unity and respect and love, aside from the drugs giving this whole effect, is incredible.
The quote 'Go within or go without', another 'You have taught what you are but have not let what you are teach you', I feel we're all moving within and taking our power back and responding to life,which is our "responsibility" [response-ability, as opposed to 'reacting' to our
We are one. And not just with each other but one whole united with every aspect of creation, which include your circumstances, situations, events, dis-ease, everything and anything that could possibly come your way. And when you put belief into changing just your MIND and your
thought patterns (the most refined form of energy), your entire life just becomes a TRIP like no drug can put you on! It's unreal!! But so Real! My lesson from the text I'm working with for today is - "I am affected by nothing but my own thoughts". BRILLIANT !
I truly do feel like I am IN the world, but no longer OF it.
You need to "believe before you can see", and all of this is theory and words for now........until you DO it and believe, then you WILL remove investment in physical sight and begin to invest in spiritual vision, which is literally staggering.
It is all about removing our investment in fear and anger and this separation consciousness and investing in love and joining and finding ourselves THROUGH finding, forgiving and loving "others". We are one and what we do or give to others we are doing to ourselves. ALL judgment is
self judgment. We are one? Therefore, everything we give, we do give to ourselves.
If a stained glass window reflects the "window of our soul", the sun the "true Source", and us on the other side of the window the "consious mind", when the sun shines through onto our conscious minds, it is deflected in many different directions, because it is first filtered and
changed through our beliefs, pre-conditioned responses, expectations etc.. ("We see things as they are not and not as they are!"). As soon as we come to a turning point where we have to ultimately change, we begin to let go, surrender and give up these beliefs and remove pieces of the stained glass,
or like a veil over a lamp, removing strands from this veil so that the light can shine through clearly, in one beam and uninterupted by our beliefs & pre-conditionings (fears).
Something to think on I guess ....(: It's ALL I think on! haha "the love of my life is.............love"
Some of my favourite quotes :
"What is to give light must endure burning" (Victor Frankl - Man's Search for Meaning)
"You have taught what you are but have not let what you are teach you" (A Course in Miracles)
"Rest in Peace is a blessing for the living, not the dead. Rest comes from waking, not from sleeping. (A Course in Miracles)
Re: the transformation the world is moving through, from the Aquarian Conspiracy - "..it makes the Rennaisance look like a stillbirth.." BRILLIANT!
"Come to the edge, he said They said, we are afraid Come to the edge, he said They came.......he pushed them, ..and they flew" (forgotten this poets name)
"To win these races you need to take your foot off the accelerator" (Marilyn Fergson - 'The Aquarian Conspiracy') BRILLIANT!
"It's only once the struggle is abandoned that it is won" (Marilyn Fergson - 'The Aquarian Conspiracy') BRILLIANT!
"Nothing Real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists Herein lies the Peace of God" (A Course in Miracles)
'Your world is not opposed to Oneness, it is embraced by it'. - "The Emmanuals Book 2"
...That last one was Dean ((: email@example.com
Dean, your words are interesting and thought provoking. You have done a lot of reading and studying, which many of us have. The challenge is putting it into practice and remembering to live consciously (aware and awake) rather than on automatic pilot (sleeping and unaware).
It takes great commitment, dedication and desire to live in the moment and aware because our entire life we've been doing the opposite.
t.d., all things do work in divine order for the highest good of all concerned. Sometimes we in our humanity interfere (enter FEAR) and things may not work out as desired. Asked (you do have spiritual guides and teachers with you all the time,to be shown what you need to learn or
understand. Once we understand what a circumsyance in our life is about, we may release it and be healed. That is how miracles happen and we are blessed. May your day be blessed. Grace
In the words of missionary Jim Elliott who died a martyr for his faith; "Wherever you are, be all there." - J.P.
feb.2002 i spent my weekend worried about money, i am so tired of money and bills ruling my mood. i worry about what bill is due and how i am going to pay it. we are a one income family of 5 and i am so blessed to be able to stay home with my kids, but the money mess always
has me worried. we live paycheck to paycheck and the kids are always needing something. i know there are so many people who are worse off than me, but the worry seems to consume me at times and i feel this burning in my stomache and my mind is always churning and worring. i dont want alot in my
life, i pray for peace, and serenity, and wellbeing, but its so hard to brng these into my life when ifeel so uneasy all the time. i feel scattered and unorganized , and unable toget a grip on my life. my husband wonders why i am uptight all the time, but he doesnt worry about things like i do, he
is easy going and i am fretting all the time. i have bee this way all of my life, so far, i just want to find a way to lose the worry that is trying to rule my life. carol
I only have the Universe to guide me through all the trials that arise throughout my life. I pray to maintain my sanity as I walk through this valleys of depression and anxiety. Despite it all I'm compelled to love. Chaiyin Auset. Peace & Blessings.
I only have the Universe to guide me through all the trials that arise throughout my life. I pray to maintain my sanity as I walk through this valleys of depression and anxiety. Despite it all I'm compelled to love. Chaiyin Auset. Peace & Blessings.
Today I realised something so profound it brought me to tears. I found out that as weak as i am God still loves me ! I found out that to become a saint we will fall again and again because...Saints are only sinners who fall down and get back up again!! Oh how wonderful to
feel the Love of someone who always has his arms stretched out waiting for us to grab ahold. Jesus is my strength , my courage thru him I can do anything.He is my redeemer. Thank you Father for giving so gracefully to all of us who are heavy laden. I would like to pass on this thought given to me
... "we have never, never , never done anything so horrific that God will not forgive us".If you don't know him get to know him by inviting him into your heart.You can do this simply by asking him to forgive you and wash you clean...and as it says in the word "the slate will be washed of all your
sins, and you will be made new". Please pray for me and my family ,as we are fighting the worlds war on drugs in our family. Thank you and God bless all that read this!!
I am also suffering from depression and anxiety. I am getting help... Seeing a therapist and trying some medications that have begun to help. I will pray for you and hope that you also seek professional help. There is hope and help for those who seek it. You have several choices in
life: live with depression and anxiety and miss out on the beauty of life, or get help and live your life to the fullest.
I know this first-hand, Chaiyin. I watched my father suffer from depression most all his life and my mother suffer from anxiety disorders most all her life. They were too stubborn and too frightened to get help. I am sad that neither got the help they needed during their lifetimes.
Their lives could have been something so differnt for them. They were wonderful people, but they missed out on many of the riches that life has to offer.
Bless you. S.S.
For several months now I have been keeping a journal of Good Thoughts. I have included observations, poetry, correspondence with others, etc., but the emphasis has been on the positive, because I thought that if someone were to read it after I am gone someday, I would want
them to be uplifted. I wouldn't want them to read dreary, depressing, or shocking things. I would want to leave behind something inspiring.
But today, and lately, I have felt overwhelmed. I feel burnt out, stressed out, and depressed. I find that I am jealous of others who had better childhoods than I did. Mine was very unhappy and my family very dysfunctional. But I can't stand to think I am so twisted as to resent
other people's good times! It's like I feel they are seeing through rose-colored glasses and their childhood wasn't really all that good.
I feel stuck - I don't have the resources to change. I don't have the physical energy, the inspiration, the free time, the money, to do anything dramatically different.
I love my family very much, but taking care of a lot of small children is draining for me. I feel trapped in an ongoing cycle and I feel like a bad mother. I used to spend time playing with them, reading to them, snuggling them. Now I am so busy trying to keep them in clean socks
and groceries! I have the responsibilities w/o the joy. And I hate to think of them spending their childhoods with this kind of mother...
"One day, I too will dance in heaven with my one." A lost girl.
Dear Sad Mama, i truly understand how you feel, i tought i was the only one who feels like this. i always feel so guilty for feeling this way. i to started a new journal on my last b-day , it was suppose to be a postive journal, but there is alot of times when there is not a
ounce of postive feelings in me. i feel burned out and frustrated, at times i feel like my home and kids are sucking the life out of me, they are always demanding something and never apprecitive of anything, my teenager thinks she has beenappointed my boss, she always gets mad because i wont go to
work so she can have more money to go spend, but it is so important to me to stay home for my kids, i have a 2 yr. old and i will stay home with him ,just like i stayed home with her. i have given up alot to stay home but i feel its the right thing to do . my older kids (15 & 11) are driving me nuts
, everything is about them, what they need or want. they dont listen and my 15 yr. old is a walking BAD attitude!! but i realize that it is my responsability to teach them , but tere are times when i cant stand to be around them, and i feel so bad and like i am a awful mom. thanks for letting me let
go of some pent up feelings. .........carol........
Carol, Thank you for responding and sharing your feelings about motherhood burnout. I also have given up a lot to stay home, but, as is the case with you, I am sure, have never regretted what was left behind. It's just that now I feel so stuck, knowing the serious importance
of taking care of myself in order to take care of my family, but not being able to find the time or other resources to renew myself. Lately, there has finally been an hour here or there when my husband can take care of the kids while I do something for myself - take a walk, go to a women's event,
etc. But it is too little, too late, it seems. :-( I truly appreciate the opportunity, but it seems that I need more regular, ongoing time to focus on my own well-being so I can be in a condition to give to the family... Sad Mama
I need to reveal what goes on with my kids. They are a bunch of young boys, and they actually destroy the house. They break their own toys, and each other's. They get into toiletries and squeeze, spray, cut open, pour out, and generally waste them. They do the same thing
with food - drink mix powders get sprinkled on the floor and cabinets, sugar poured into the baby's seat, coffee grounds spilled on the floor, peanut butter smeared on the chairs. They write on the walls, furniture, clothing, appliances, toys, and everything else, with markers, crayons, pens and
pencils. They rummage through my purse, my dresser drawers, my desk, and my husband's possessions, as well. They peel at paint and wallpaper, pry at boards, unscrew screws. They pull the clean clothes off the hangers, and throw them out of drawers. They also throw down the clean sheets and blankets
from the closets. This is all in addition to the normal child behaviors of throwing dirty clothes on the floor, leaving candy wrappers and banana peels around, not flushing the toilet, etc. They fight outrageously not to have to shower or bathe, and when they finally do they flood the bathroom floor
with water. I am at my wits end, not knowing why they persist in this destructiveness! They are otherwise nice children. They do well in school, and have good reports on their behavior from everyone else. No one would believe the way they carry on at home like wild animals. It totally wears me down
and depresses me. Any suggestions or words or wisdom? Sad Mama
The privacy and solitude of my personal journal has been a refuge of solace, an oasis of inspiration and a neverending source of essential learning for most of my life.
This is the first entry I am making beyond the privacy sanctuary, the first step outside my front door to admire the new day. Intensely aware.
Leaving that privacy you mention, to write where the world can see, has been a positive experience for me. It helps me see things objectively, rather than just nurse my feelings.
Sad Mama, I have just read your entries and have absolutely no problem relating to you struggles and feelings. As I read your words, it hit me that things seemed to be better and flow more smoothly when you did those fun things with your children.
My children are no longer children, they are young adults. I too was caught up in all the "things' a mother needs to fulfill her responsibilities. In the process I also began to neglect doing those special things that bring you and your children joy. Unfortunately for me it's quite
a bit too late. I used to rationalize the many things I did and kept busy with. Today, none of those things have or had real importance.
If I could do it again, I'd spend more time with the chhildren doing "fun" things. As a teacher, it's the same with my students. Do I focus solely on the academics or do I break down and enjoy the teachable moments that arise. Even here I have forgotten, so wound up with
professinal duties and responsibilities.
In my heart I feel and know that this is NOT the way.There is so much more to life. Nurturing the spirit within ourselves and especially our children is a noble purpose. I encourage you to take some time today or tomorrow and forget about what you thinks needs to be done and do
something special with your children. Try and connect with the child within you to help.
Hang in there, ask for guidance and help. It is all around you. Grace
Grace, Thank you for your kind and supportive words and suggestions. I really appreciate your giving me the benefit of your experience. :-) Sad Mama
My God!!!!!!!! Sad Mama, where in the world is your head??? You are the matriarch of your kingdom! It's true you should show your children the love you have for them but you must also teach them that there are limits and boundaries which we must accept in our lives. You are
your children's mother, teacher and protector. They are to honor this no matter what! If they do not learn this at home they will have no value nor respect for the rest of the things to come into their lives. @@ A mother also
I am reclaiming the love that we have for one another~~~ Simone
I was there; and I was all I am.~~~I love you! ~~~Simone
i find myself irritable and aggravated all of the time. for some reason i let little things get to me. someone, usually my teenager,will say something to me and it just rubs me the wrong way, and i just goover and over it in my mind, what i should of said or what i will say
next time. for some reason my 15 year old and i cannot be together for long with an argument starting. i was not like that with my mom , i realize we are not the same person and this is a different time, but she gets to me so bad. i feel closer to her than my mom and i were, i didnt talk alt to my
mom when i was a teenager, i never talked back or sassed her, i didnt want her to think bad about me , that was a big problem i had , and am still working on . i would be obsessed about what people thought of me, i didnt want anyone to think bad of me or not like me. well my daughter doesnt seem to
have this problem , in a way i am glad because i missed alot of livng worried all the time, but sometimes she drives me crazy! she tries to boss me around and iwill not take it and here we go, the argument is on. i know children go through a phase of trying to gain some independence, and trying to
find their place in the world, and seeing how far they can get without their mama, but it just gets so hard sometimes. i am tired of being angry and irratated ALL the time. i dont seem to be having fun anymore, its been a really long time since i have felt carefree and easy going. i just want to
enjoy my life, i am so ,so tired of feeling this way. i feel so heavy all of the time. thanks for listening, it feels good to let this out. .....carol....
I Love You Man!
I sometimes stare at my ceiling before going to bed and just watch at how my candle's reflection dances all over it. This is unusual, yes, but this is the only time that I have to ponder about the day's events. It is sad though, because lately.....my moment's in this
surrounding atmosphere have led me to believe that maybe these events during the day are nothing more than tests that are given to me and if they are tests, who gives them? Have I failed? I wish answers came attached to questions. Yours truly, Unnaturallovely
over and over again seperate from them but remember when together hard in front of a cathode ray tube set it on fire to eradicate the chance of ever seeing it again
be somone else they'de never know tell them waht to do like they'd do to you
climb the walls look down in silence optical sensitive daggers learn them what matters
no questions dont let them ask why should they know the truth why should they know what they mean to you
To carol with the teenage daughter: I too have those same feelings about a teenage son. This has been the most difficult time of my life. But, I keep my hope in my God who promises that He who began a good work in my son will be faithful to complete it. Let's be sure to pray
diligently for our children. Also, I got some advice today that my help you. Do not allow yourself to think negatively toward your children. Every negative thought or worry should be replaced quickly with a positive affirming thought for them. And I can't say it enough....We have to pray for the
children....I understand your pain and heartache... Dearest Father, Please set your hand upon Carol and her teenage daughter during this difficult time. Give Carol peace and guide her toward laughter and fun. Bless her with an everlasting joy that not even teenage years can destroy. Amen
I have surrendered to the pain of this world.
I feel shattered and empty. After 6and half years of separation I sat in my lawyers office to finally settle things tonight. Looking back, four hours passed by in a blur. I signed papers and don't seem to understand how things ended up the way they. I can't answer the valid
questions of may family. I feel so lost...so incapable...so broken. I have no answers for myself. I feel I didn't make the right choices under pressure. My value as a mother for twelve years was undermined, and other things as well. My heart and soul ache...was everything done truly in
fairness...I'm not so sure.... Grace
@@ A mother also:
I completely agree with what you are saying - it only makes me sadder. The problem is that I don't seem to have the strength to teach them. There are six against one, and this one is very tired. :-( I turn my back and find they have done these things again. I talk to them, I punish
them, I try to make it clear. But I can't MAKE them behave. I am telling you that I don't *know* what to do... I am telling you that I don't have the resources to handle the situation when they get like that. I can't watch each one of them every minute, and the consequences I impose don't seem to
phase them. Where to start... Sad Mama
THANK YOU for the prayer for me and for all moms going through raising kids! my two older kids spent the night with friends thispast weekend and i was able to have some time with myself. i feel a sense of renewel and refreshed. this is something that moms have to fight for,
i time to ourselves. its so hard to find time to ourself, but it can work wonders. i have trouble getting my husband to understand this. when he wants to he can just go out to his barn (we raise chickens) or run over to one of his friends house, but if i try this i have to hurry because he has so
much to do, i cant get him to understand that i need time to myself. i told him that for my 40th b-day i wanted to go away for a few days by myself, and he took it so personaly, i just needto be with myself and remember the woman that i am, sometimes i feel that she is lost in the laundry and dirty
dishes, i wonder where she went. there have been times that i looked in the mirror and did not recognize the person looking back at me. some times its hard to remember the woman you really are when your kids are hanging all over you or trying to boss you around. i think its time for us mothers to
start taking time for ourselves, its so hard but it makes us feel so much better. i have to fight just to take a bath by myself, but it is something we need. thanks, carol
Helena Matias Dear Journal , I am a stay home mom that is going through some rough times. I feel frustrated that I have no income right now . However I am gratful that I am able to stay home with my children and be there for my daughter when she returns from school daily. In
my heart I know I am doning the right \ thing , however I had to give up a great income in
Being a mom is the hardest work in the world to all the mom's out there.
When you come to the edge of all you know, you must believe one of tow things... that there will be ground to stand on, or you will be given wings to fly. Chao
very profound words Chao. Thank you. I looked forward to an entry from you again. You seem to write words with wisdom.
Even as I am going through a tremendous challenge, in my own life's journey, I know your words are true. It is most challenging to remain centered when you wish things would be different than they actually are. Grace
Growing up - is it really 'just a part of life',or does the world force us into it? Personaly, I want to remain a child forever. In fact, I belive that God is a child at heart . . . Christina Schuster (17)
Grace, the challeng is not to wish things would be different but to accept what is. It easier to ride a hours in the direction that he's going. When you want what you get, you get what you want. Chao
Focus on being authentic in each moment. Speak your truth, act your truth, be your truth. Say those positive things you have been meaning to say. Make those connections to people you just never seem to have time to connect with. Tell people that you love them or that they
have made a difference in your life. Be open and honest in the moment. Grace
Chao, I understand what you are saying, however, that is much easier said than done. Bottom line is, I MISS my family very, very much. Time does heal some differences and then it's too late. Trusting that all is as it is needs to be is difficult when your emotions are
Today I celebrate my 44th birthday and I have lived a rich life of twists and turns, as unmaterialistically as I could because the spirit has always been my true home. Nothing has fed me as well as love and sharing all these years, tho I had to define this for myself through
difficult life lessons. My brightest blessing has been the beautiful boy I birthed who struggles with autism, but is usually so happy that he lightens our house like a guiding star. If the Universe has sent me this baby to show me the way to a higher level of existence, it could not have done it
better. My Andy is a light and a teacher of so many outside my home because he elicits the best in people, smiles, lovingness, nurturing, a sense of achievement because they can reach him and he shows them gratefulness. We are blessed in my family and I wanted to share that with you. Blessed be.
Grace, This being your trueself and conecting to you sprit is not an easy road to travel. In fact it's the road less traveled. Ask your self how many people you know that hve conected to there sprit. You may not know of any. Non theless your emotions are not the problem your
REACTION to them is. Since most problems are a mannifestation of suppressed emotions, it is recommended that you search within your self for the emotions you are holding and express them in a healthy manner (if you Miss your family, let them know) This will assist in your healing and trasformation.
Let go of any belief or judgment you may have about expressing emotions. Know that the expression of all emotions is healthy and natual. To get into your emotions, get out of your head (thoughts) and into your heart. Chao
By the grace of God I have 17 months clean today!!!! But, who's counting... I am very grateful!! -Kristen
THANK YOU, to all of you with kind and such WISE words and thoughts.i have read s much wisdom from everyone here, i only wish the people i talk to everyday had so much wisdom to share with me!! for so long i feltlike i was the only one that felt this way about life and
struggling to raise a family and have a good home, but now i dont feel so alone !!! when i get together with some friend or neighbor i always felt like i was so different from them, because they always seem to have it all together. i feel like a have a dirty little seceret, my house stays a mess, or
i am always late paying a bill,or one of my checks bounced. my friends all work and for some reason i always feel guilty about staying home, i cant go shopping like them, or dont have a nice house like them, but all of the material things dont mattr to me, i am so grateful to be able to stay home. i
just feel bad because i cant seem to get it together, i am unorganized and forget things and i felt like i had a problem. i am not a bad person, although i often feel like a bad parent because of the way my kids act and talk. i am so glad to hear such wisdom from all of you, you are just what i
needed. i look so forward to coming to this site and reading from all of you. your words help get me through my long endless days. THANK YOU for listening and sharing. GOD BLESS YOU ALL. MAY YOU FIND PEACE HERE AS I DO !!!! ~~CAROL~~ feb.28,2002
I feel disappointed that after all these years I still do not have the communication with my husband that I have wanted. I have a deep craving for companionship, and have been trying for 20 years to have that need met with him. He is a wonderful husband in so many ways; we
love each other very much and in many ways are very close. But I resent so much that there never seems to be time for me. Even when he is home he is busy. He talks on the computer to other people in chat rooms. He says that that is undemanding because he can participate as much or little as he
wants, whereas to talk with me he needs to give his whole attention. It's true that I would want him to attend, and not just uh-huh me - but when will that time be?? I am trying to develop other healthy ways to have my needs for adult conversation met. But it is a big disappointment that the day has
never come when he is un-stressed enough to just BE with me on a regular basis. -Wifey
Kristen, ...congratulations! This is a big thing for you and a tremendous reason to celebrate and rejoice. Go ahead and do it!
Carol,... as I read your thoughts and feelings, I can definitely relate. One thing I will share with you from my own struggle. As long as you focus on all the negatives in your life, they become your reality. Try to focus on something positive, anything. If there's something you
don't like and can work on changing it, go for it! If I focused on the things that trouble me I would be a gonner for sure. Hope this helps a little. It does work.
Wifey,...I also understand what you're talking about since I also experienced much the same not too long ago. The man I had spent 20 years with and the father of our 3 children, was no longer my friend, my companion, my support. It became more and more difficult until one day I
left. It was too much for my spirit to bare. I didn't have what it took to see it through. The loneliness seemed unbearable and the differences irreparable. It has now been 6 and a half years. I miss my family immensely and my heart often aches. Chao says I must ride with the horse in the direction
it is going. I'm sure that is the way. I picture myself on that horse but facing backwards. hindsight would say, nurturing that bond is so imortant and so is HONEST, OPEN communication. This may also not be easy or heard on the other end. Do what feels right for you, try and find a way of reaching
out to your husband. Blessings to you.
Chao,... my family(children) does know how much I miss them. I think it's akward for them. They are oldeer though (23,21 and 17). You are right,... I must be careful of the reactions I have to my emotions. They are very counter-productive and certainly do not achieve anything good.
Thank you for your words. I appreciate the truth and challenge within them. Grace
I buried my cat of seventeen years today. Her death also ended an era of my life. In those seventeen years love came and went and came again. My father and brother died. Friends moved and new ones entered my life. Babies were born and grew up. In those seventeen years the
only thing that was constant in my life was my cat. She stood by me. I thank God for her presence in my life and the lessons she gave me of loyalty, patience and love. I buried my cat today and I could feel her next to me telling me everything will be alright. Sheva
Dear Sheva, My heart goes out to you. Last Friday, I had to say goodbye to my precious little kitten, Misty. Misty was only in my life for two short months, but during that time, she left an indelible mark of love and joy in my heart. Like a butterfly, she flew in one window
of my life and out another. She became very ill, very quickly, suffering from numerous diseased organs. It is difficult to understand why God would give me only two months time with this precious little angel. Losing her has been almost as devastating as losing my eighteen-year-old childhood cat,
back in 1995. I remember crying for weeks. I still cry when I think of her love.
I am blessed to have two sweet angels waiting for me on Rainbow Bridge. And, I am blessed with two other precious kitties who fill my days with light and joy. We miss Misty so very much. We will always remember her unconditional love, sweet playful ways, and her beautiful, radiant
May God bless you, Sheva. May you feel your cat's love with you always. I visited the "Rainbow Bridge" Pet Loss Grief Support website this week, and it brought me so much peace and comfort. They have a wonderful Candle Lighting Prayer Service, every Monday night, in memory of all
the furbabies who have gone to Rainbow Bridge. May you also find peace there. www.petloss.com
Sheva and Valerie, I am sorry for your losses. The animals in our lives are more than just pets. They are our companions who are cherished so much and when they pass on it is painful. I do believe that you will be with them again. My cat Loretta is my girl, has been through
all of my ups and very low downs and I love her like family. Take Care...-Kristen
GRACE, you are so right, i realize that what you believe and think becomes your reality! Thank you for reminding me. my life is so great, i do have small problems and i seems to be real good at making them seem huge. i am so sorry for all of the heartaches you have been
through , you seem to be a very strong and wise person. i am so grateful for my life and for the love i receive. I AM SO BLESSED!!! ~~carol~~
The person who is born with a talent which he was meant to use finds his greatest happiness in using it.
But life is worth nothing unless I use it for doing the work assigned me by the lord Jesus. Acts 20:24 TLB
How will I mark this blank space? What mark shall I leave behind in rememberance of me?
If only I could remember to live each day with the same thought in mind. Perhaps then, what a glorious life it would be.
Tina-Marie,...the fact that you have even left the printed word here means you have left a mark, a small part of the spark and essence which is you. More importantly...how do you WANT to be remembered? You and only you can answer that. Thank you for sharing what you did and may you
and your day be blessed with something special. Grace
What does it take for you to hear the univesral whisper papito???????? ~~~ Simone
And Chao have you connected to your true spirit~~~ If so let me know!
Chao, I found your e-mail address way back in earlier entries and tried to e-mail you. The message was returned. Thought I'd try. Grace
2:46am Tossing and turning not knowing why subconciously my feelings are stronger than I
I do not know why I come to the computer and share my thoughts in this link Soulful Journal
My visions and dreams keep me with anticipation and find this quest is just a mission
For each teacher and student is just a path to journey and release tomarrows past
I am not a poet nor writer just a spirit staring at this site so filled love and laughter
Love & Light Van Doren~
Grace we touch our sprit everyday it's the essence of our being. My email is firstname.lastname@example.org if you would like to discuss this further. Chao
One of my housemates left the sober house I live at and was dead a month later from alcohol. Now, another one left to her own place less than a week ago and is already back to using. I found an apartment and I will be moving in 11 days and I can honestly say that I am a little
scared. I am not those other women, but we share a common bond...addiction. I have faith that I will be ok. This is just the next phase im my life that I need to go through. It's funny though that at 32 yrs. old, I have had several apartments before but this time I am nervous. I have been in
programs for over 17 months straight now and it's time to stand on my own regarding my living situation. I welcome the change over all...but I am allowing myself to be scared because I don't want to forget where I came from. -Kristen
Kristen...it's understandable how you are feeling. From a spiritual, healing and growth perspective I suggest and cancel out the thought that you have a common bond with these other two women. If you feel you do, you are more likely to go there. Cancel the thought, send it back to
where it came so that it has no power or control over you. Remember, thought is energy, if you feed it, it will grow. This really does work. Celebrate who you have become and are becoming. Let go of the past. A door has shut and a window opens with new opportunities and blessings ahead. Have faith,
cast your doubts to the wind. Grace
I have realized that nothing is ever the way we believe it is...things are constantly changing, people are constantly changing. Our finite minds cannot concieve what truth and spirituality "really" are until we are ready to open our minds to all possiblities. Then we can see things
for what they really are. And when we do, we grow, appreciate and experience life more full than ever before. Then we will have changed. Then, and only then, we will know our true selves. But, we must look inside for our answers, for there lies all truth. Always be true to yourself and one another.
as i write this in the present, you are reading it in the future, as you read this in the present, i wrote it in the past.
Kunal Gauba - Toronto, Canada
I went to visit my father in the hospital earlier this evening (he is 83). We had a nice visit, he was quite entertaining. On our way out I took a closer look at the mural on the wall since it had big angels. The quote said: "We are all angels with one wing, to be able to fly we
must embrace each other." Quite profound I thought and so I share it with you. Grace
Golden sunshine pouring into my window this morning. Grace.
Mountain glaciers brilliant in morning light, sea a deeper green than emeralds. Peace.
How can I seize the day, carpe diem, if it has seized me first?
Tara...the day has only seized you because you have allowed it to. NOTHING happns to us without our permission...even though we may not be conscious of it or want to take responsibility for it. We write the script to our play each and every moment of our day, whether we are
sleeping or awakened. For as much as we can shift a thought, we shift our reality. Grace
Be proud of the person you are, of your adventure, your story, the characters in your play are only those whom you invite. Chao
I like these words Chao. They inspire us to take responsibility for our lives and what is happening in them. Grace
I feel like you have to confront your fears and as you do you gain the power to move on. I like people with a strong will. Whol look at life as a journey, something like "the Wizard of Oz". Come on wake up, everything is energy; therefore, understand the power of perspective and if
you have depression is because you are only thinking of yourself. Look outside of yourself, this is the healing you need to confront, get away from your problems and yourself. Mayra
"We, as humans, are ALL enlightened. It is just that some of us actually have the light ON." Rev. Cassandra Anaya-Bagaço, Ph.D.
I am reading a great book...The Power of One... and share these two thoughts that I found were quite profound.
"The pollution of the planet is only an outward reflection of an inner psychic(soul) pollution: millions of unconscious individuals not taking responsibility for their inner peace."
"Anything done with negative energy will become contaminated by it and in time give rise to more pain, more unhappiness. Furthermore, any negative inner state is contagious: unhappiness spreads more easily than a physical."
"If taking any action about a situation(leaving it, changing it or accepting it totally), drop the negativity FIRST. Action arising out of insight is MORE effective than action arising out of negativity."
Good thoughts to reflect upon. Grace
I apologize...the name of the book is The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.
I have just spent a few days visiting my daughter and met some of her friends. It is wonderful to observe their free natures and spirits...actively pursuing their hopes and dreams no matter where that takes them. Their lives enriched by incredible adventures and experiences. Thank
goodness they are not bound to duty and responsibility...at this young age...like so many of us were. Even spirituality was discussed openly and without limitations. So neat! Just wanted to share this wonderful experience with my friends here. Grace
Having two loved ones leave the planet on the same day has only made me more aware that the only thing that matters is love. I am glad to see more people taking the time to tell others that they love them and appreciate them and to hug each other--hug therapy is great! Take time
for your life people and be good to each other and yourself. Loriel
The sun shines not on us but in us. The rivers flow not past, but through us, thrilling, tingling, vibrating every fiber and cell of the substance of our bodies, making them glide and sing.
"When something needs to be done in the world to rectify the wrongs, if one is really concerned with benefiting others, one needs to be engaged, involved."
~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama ~
What have I done today, and what will it matter in the light of eternity? 50 years form now, what will my 4 children remember about me? Will they remember how much time i spend at my job or how much I am available to them? I need to remember not to get so cought up in worrying
about what may happen tomorrow, that I miss what is happening today! Jandi
Melody of Soul
I see reminiscence in your smile charming my inner spirit into a dimension long forgone in a past that was unsaid ‘til I heard you speak to my heart in a melody of spine tingling sound checks of studio renditions that play upon my very soul.
Sharon Rose Aug.28/99
" If The Doors of Perception Were Cleasnsed, Everything Would Appear To Man as it is Infinite" William Blake
I can stop thinking about my real first love. ...Even after so many years he keeps in my mind. Would him ever know how important .... Me
Every heart is filled with dreams, prayers, hopes, and faith, and that a graceful life is given to those who are grateful. Grace
Hecate, Cerridwen, dark mother take me in, Hecate, Cerridwen, let me be reborn.
For you Simone " God is the one who prays and loves in us" Chao
March 26, 2002 What a BEAUTIFUL day here in Texas, its a little chilly, but thingsare coming back to life. The brown grass is turning green, the sticks in my flower beds are getting new leaves on them ,the birds are waiting for some seed in the feeders. I love this time of the
year, everything starts coming out of its winter sleep. I feel the same way , i feel a different type of energy around. i am ready to get out of the house and start decorating my yard, it has been waiting for me to take care of it. When i work out in my garden i feel an appeciation from the earth, i
am rewarded with beautiful flowers, and food to eat and share with others, just a little water and food and some TLC,and i am rewarded with beauty . I feel so alive!! .......carol
I have been searching my whole life at varying degrees of intensity, and now - at 46 - I have finally discovered what I always knew: that I am not my possessions, or relationships, or position, or stature. I am. I give thanks each day to the Keeper of the Deep Places for Eckhart
Tolle's ability to use words which speak to me, and not to my mind. All striving is over. Joy, peace, love - all are available NOW, not at some point in the future when I finally get enough [whatever]. Read The Power of NOW. Better, get the unabridged CDs and listen to Eckhart read his own writing.
And experience the end of suffering. Rick D.
Here,here for the Power of Now. Most enlightening. Chao
"In the struggle between yourself and the world, second the world" by Feanz Kafka Chao
Today marks 18 months in recovery. I am grateful! -Kristen
Congrats, Kristen! That is wonderful!
What a fabulous day. It is a blessing to be alive and to share all that I am and can be with others. If I am faithful to do this, that is all that matters. Jandi
I must also say that the Power of Now is a very good book. I'm not quite finished but the parts I read today on the drive to Milwaukee (from Canada) were great. Such a different way of looking at things. Grace
Sorry for the double send...I'm not using my owm computer. Some of the best things I have learned in the past year have come from the Unarian Academy of Science... life altering principles affecting healing and self-mastery. Grace
I am manager at a elderly group home, and I am also their primary caregiver. I love those people with all my soul and protect them with my heart. I guess, I would call this soulful living. To my seven sweethearts I am their sunshine and I am honored to share in their lives daily
they truly are a blessing to me, and my husband also. Regina Norton
18 months in recovery. Thats grate this one is for you Kristen.
We are close to waking up when we dream that we are dreaming. Novalis Chao
I am waking up and it has become a true miracle in my life........ Happy Easter Everyone in the SoulfulLiving Community~~~ Simone
Enjoy this wonderful day! Have a Happy Easter everyone! -Kristen
Today, I begin a new journey, a journey that will make my life a whole new and worthy. I admitted that I don't love myself, and with the help of friends. I am now redeveloping my relationship with God and taking the first step to learn to love myself.
That's the best and only step we should begin with. Grace
"I can do all things through Christ, which strengthens me. As I wait upon the Lord, my strength shall renew and I shall mount up with wings like Eagle. I shall run and not be weary, I shall walk and not faint. For the Lord is my shepard, I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in
the green pastures. He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul. And though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil. For Thou are here, Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me. Thou has prepared a banquet before me in the presence of my enemies. Thou has
anointed my head with oil. My cup overflows. Surely Goodness and Mercy shall follow me for the rest of the days of my life and I shall dwell in the House of the Lord forever."
This has become my prayer of strength and encouragement as I go on this journey.